Feel like crying - this is the final straw - please come and tell me I'm being silly

[cottonwoolbrain]

And its an utterly ridiculous thing to get upset about. The butcher has sent us a HUGE leg of pork instead of the rolled joint of gammon we ordered because they've run out of gammon. I now have a 14 pound leg of pork lurking ominously in the fridge along with the turkey (far smaller than expected). Butchers have given me a big discount and left a very apologetic note (they delivered it earlier).

This is on top of DSD being stuck in Scotland, all the general problems everyone has this year of not being able to see their family

DSS's announced at 8pm last night that he has to work Christmas day 8am - 5pm (he'd been told he wasn't but someone else dropped out and they told him he had to). That means cooking dinner rather than lunch when all I want to do on Christmas afternoon is collapse.

BOTH showers chose Sunday to break and now I have a strange man standing in my bathroom muttering about things that sound expensive - they're going to need replacing and possibly retiling around them. One of them thankfully sort of works if you don't mind going from hell fire to ice in the space of a few seconds

Worse electrician turned up without warning to instead of tomorrow as he'd had a cancellation and found me in my pyjamas looking worse than something cat dragged in - he'd texted ahead but my phone was off so he was met by a very confused slightly smelly woman with her tits hanging south and with no idea who he was or why he was there.

I also had a seizure in the night (mild thankfully but enough to make me in a lot of pain, dizzy and utterly exhausted with a cracking headache so I probably come across to poor electrician as utterly dolally.

DD (15) is not feeling very well - not covid symptoms and DS (8) is running about like a mad thing wanting to know when I will wrap the presents and trying to climb the Christmas tree

I feel completely out of control, desperate to see my mum and now I'm distraught over a leg of f*cking pork :(

DP has gone to work away from this madness

(Oh and I've lost my favourite socks!)

(Oh and I've lost my favourite socks!)

This is your priority. Forget everything else.

@BaronessBomburst

Can you pay the plumber in pork?

No, just lettuce 😂🤣

Lettuce!

OP, I’ve cried about much less in the last few days: DH bought me a Christmas card (I can’t buy him one as I’m in isolation), the prawns have a use by date of Christmas Eve are two sob-fests I’ve had since Friday.

You’ve totally got this.

Well the bean chilli is simmering, the washing machine is on and the rest put away and my kitchen no longer looks like a serious Kim and Aggie case - just a mild one.

DS has calmed down and is making paperchains with DD.

Painkillers kicking in now too.

Oh and a really good looking man turned up with a parcel for DP... this time I was dressed - good thing he didn't hang about or I'd have gone weak at the knees and collapsed in the porch

I will think about all the great ideas for dealing with the pork. We normally do have gammon and baked potatoes with various salads on Christmas eve but pork and stuffing baps is starting to sound very appealling.

Right muffins

Finally fantastic news... found my socks in the tumble drier... things are getting better.

PS @1forAll74 I find it more efficient to donate the equivalent cost of Christmas lunch ingredients to my local food bank... they know where the people who need help are and what they need.

Get off here and go chill with a nice cuppa. It could be worse for all of us

OP you need to laugh about it. There’s not much else you can do.

I think that's enough to make anyone cry!

So much good advice and empathy here that I won't add more - just be kind to yourself!

Sounds awful OP, hoping you get some rest and relaxation after all this

I cried this morning for a similar reason - the capon we ordered for Christmas was cancelled (held up in France, I assume). I called another butcher and all he had was a 5kg turkey someone had in turn cancelled on him and he was stuck with it. 5 kilo turkey for 2 adults 2 kids! I will have to cook the crown only, and freeze the legs for another day!

Pork and stuffing baps with crackling and applesauce will be amazing!!! Food of the gods.

You sound very privileged!

@lazylump72

OH and forgot to say..your lost socks..offer the kids a tenner to whom ever finds them! Gaurenteed they will turn up!!!!!

Ha. We do this with missing things and the look of horror on their faces when asked to do something changes instantly, when its a for a quid to whoever finds it.

Go from them standing in the middle of the room staring into space yelling 'I cant find it' because it has not jumped out at them, to mad dashes and it found quickly. Weirdly, they seem to take turns with that part, one time DD will shoot off and DS shrug, opposite others.

Followed by wailing about how unfair it is that one of them has a pound and the other doesn't when the other didn't even bother looking..

Also, its often something that seems silly that is the last straw for people. Have previously found myself crying over running out of milk When I was pregnant, I was a little hysterical one day because I started thinking how vegetables are alive and we kill and eat them and noone feels bad about it, because its just veg, and sometimes they lose their lives just to be cooked and thrown in the bin...surprised DH didn't section me to be quite honest. Tears over pork would be very rational compared to a few of my breakdowns, so you are not alone!

If possible, try to set aside a bit of time to yourself, to read, or have a bath or something. It does all seem a bit much sometimes, especially these days.

1forAll74
Cook your big pork, then slice it up, and distribute it to all the needy people in your area, then you might forget about the rest of your problems

ODFOD! This was a really supportive and useful thread till you and bloody Airyfairy turned up!!

OP, ignore the couple of tossers on here with the unhelpful crap...that was a great response back btw! You're doing a fab job, and sound like you're back on track again.
And I'm all over the pork and stuffing rolls on Christmas Eve, they sound banging!!

I'm sorry OP but your post really made me chuckle!! What you really need are some MN suggestions of what to do with a pig's leg. Does it have the trotters still attached?

Right then. Get your kids 'crafting'. Empty jam jars at the ready. They can make your world famous jars of Pork Rillets. Very artisan. Of course, they will probably get fed to the cat, but it will keep the kids busy and get rid of the pork.

@Airyfairymarybeary

You sound very privileged!

I am... I really am very very lucky in lots of ways but that does not mean things don't get on top of me from time to time... I'm priviledged, but I'm also human.

Conversely, I think all those of you who are allowed to drive have privilege - I'd love to be allowed but its not happening is it.

@Arthersleep

I'm sorry OP but your post really made me chuckle!! What you really need are some MN suggestions of what to do with a pig's leg. Does it have the trotters still attached?

No the trotters thank goodness appear to be been amputated.

Perhaps I could turn this into a project along the lines of a mumsnet chicken - realistically it should feed the whole family well into February and if I fail, I'm clearly a frivolous housewife who frittered away the last ounce of marrow (can I make pork fritters???)

@Airyfairymarybeary

You sound very privileged!

Not particularly, but it's preferable to what making a comment like that on this thread makes you sound like.

If it makes you feel any better OP, a few weeks ago, I had a scaffolder show up about 7am when he’d said he’d be there about 8.30am. I was still in bed, in my silk PJ’s which were not very forgiving on the nipples when I opened the door and an icy blast made them stand to attention. He really didn’t seem to mind and was far too polite to mention it. But we both knew he saw.

I've just reread the entire thread and want thank you all for replying. I was really miserable when I posted, everything just seemed utterly overwhelming and exhausting.

So many of you made such kind and helpful posts - it really did make me feel better and as if things might actually be possible to handle after all.

I've had a look at the triceratops leg . I think it will fit in the roasting tin I used for the turkey and luckily, I've got extra tin foil so I'll try cooking it tomorrow very slowly with maybe a bit of apple juice and garlic... I will not be defeated by any challenge my butcher chooses to throw at me (Hope he's not reading this, he'll probably send the whole pig next time grunting away in its sty)

A big thank you all of you who took the time to cheer me up I really did need it this morning.

Merry Christmas one and all

Op, you sound lovely. Look after yourself.

the poor postman has seen me straight out of bed from a sound sleep before when I have forgotten I have an order coming. well to be fiar it did take about two months to make its way over from china.

another poor sod of a poster opened the door to the postman with one boob hangingout as she had been breastfeeding and forgotten to put it away. (not me)

Pork monstrosity in the oven - its going to take five hours and I had to use the turkey roasting tin as it was the only thing big enough to take it - it wouldn't even go in my large slow cooker.

Hope you're all getting on well and finding some semblance of joy and Christmas spirit on this miserable rainy day. Wish I could invite you all round for a pork sandwich (I've got lots of cheese for vegeterians) - think there'd be plenty for you all.

There’s something very lemonade from lemons going on there cotton

Hope your week keeps getting better & better