Feel like crying - this is the final straw - please come and tell me I'm being silly

[cottonwoolbrain]

And its an utterly ridiculous thing to get upset about. The butcher has sent us a HUGE leg of pork instead of the rolled joint of gammon we ordered because they've run out of gammon. I now have a 14 pound leg of pork lurking ominously in the fridge along with the turkey (far smaller than expected). Butchers have given me a big discount and left a very apologetic note (they delivered it earlier).

This is on top of DSD being stuck in Scotland, all the general problems everyone has this year of not being able to see their family

DSS's announced at 8pm last night that he has to work Christmas day 8am - 5pm (he'd been told he wasn't but someone else dropped out and they told him he had to). That means cooking dinner rather than lunch when all I want to do on Christmas afternoon is collapse.

BOTH showers chose Sunday to break and now I have a strange man standing in my bathroom muttering about things that sound expensive - they're going to need replacing and possibly retiling around them. One of them thankfully sort of works if you don't mind going from hell fire to ice in the space of a few seconds

Worse electrician turned up without warning to instead of tomorrow as he'd had a cancellation and found me in my pyjamas looking worse than something cat dragged in - he'd texted ahead but my phone was off so he was met by a very confused slightly smelly woman with her tits hanging south and with no idea who he was or why he was there.

I also had a seizure in the night (mild thankfully but enough to make me in a lot of pain, dizzy and utterly exhausted with a cracking headache so I probably come across to poor electrician as utterly dolally.

DD (15) is not feeling very well - not covid symptoms and DS (8) is running about like a mad thing wanting to know when I will wrap the presents and trying to climb the Christmas tree

I feel completely out of control, desperate to see my mum and now I'm distraught over a leg of f*cking pork :(

DP has gone to work away from this madness

(Oh and I've lost my favourite socks!)

Lots of sympathy your way. Do you have a slow cooker? Cut some of the pork and put it in the slow cooker. Pulled pork, apple sauce and stuffing rolls on boxing day easy and substantial. Sliced roast pork works just as well.
Take it easy today

Cut the pork joint in half and put half in the freezer. Look on BBC Good Food for a recipe for it. Consider cooking the pork in advance so there's only the turkey to deal with on Christmas Day. Get up for the kids to unwrap their presents on Christmas Day then go and have a nap before you get on with the cooking. Get everyone roped in to prep the veg on Christmas Eve to reduce the workload on the day.

You can do this!

Would it suit you to do turkey on cmas eve for dinner instarad, then you can flop on christmas day?

Pork, crackling & apple sauce for New Year's Day?

I like the sound of that so much that if I was nearby I`d have that pork & have that for Christmas Day!

Haven't had it for years & am fancying it now!

I'd love a fridge I can fit a turkey and a huge pork leg in - I regularly have a hissy fit over 'fridge tetris'

My mum always does pork and stuffing cobs on Christmas Eve which is lovely. Hack a bit off and roast on Thursday, freeze the rest for when you can think about what to make with it.

Pork and gammon are totally different IMO. I'd be really annoyed if I were you, it's like getting a duck instead of a chicken. Both tasty but they make completely different meals.

tomorrow is a new day- but I have definitely cried over much less!

@BaronessBomburst

Can you pay the plumber in pork?

Pure gold.

Do ask

OP I feel ya... I'd be bribing the 8 year old to 'be your legs' I used to do this with my ds - he's 12 now so not as obliging, but I get him to fetch and carry for me. How ill is 15 year old - s'he needs to help too - all hands on deck. And make a list for dh for when he gets home :) There was a woman sobbing in m&s last night because there were no turkeys left... Lots of people were trying to comfort her and the staff were saying they might have more in tomorrow, and one found her a big chicken, but she was inconsolable :( I'm sure it wasn't really the 'turkey'. everyone is feeling it this year. Would the pork fit in the freezer - I think just stick it in there until you're mentally ready to deal with it - that would freak me out, plus you probably have no space in your fridge...!? Hope you feel better soon Xxxx

Cut the leg of pork into joints the size of which you want and freeze some. Turkey and pork as a combination is lovely and often used as Christmas dinner, yum! Crackling is gorgeous. You also know that even a small turkey goes a long way.

Don't cry, your meals will be splendid (can I come?).

OP you can TOTALLY do this! Your ten-point plan sounds extremely productive, and most importantly you're keeping your sense of humour and MNing when things feel horrible
Lots of good ideas here about using the pork. I'm sure you'll figure out what is best. (I would LOVE pork and crackling on Christmas Day too!!)
Hope the day is better than you expect. You've got this.

Have you got enough drinks and enough chocolate? That's the important bit.

I have stocked up on crisps and biscuits, (and a few frozen pizzas!) in case it all goes tits up with Christmas food. My kids would probably love that.

You are holding on very well OP!

That is so annoying. I'm not keen on pork. I did a bit of my knitting DH kept talking so I got it wrong so had to unpick . Grrr. Freeze the pork if you can and get gammon somewhere else.

Sorry to hear about your seizure, no doubt that left you exhausted and with everything else as well, I’d be the same (and I feel for you on the disappearing sock issue so frustrating). Let yourself rest, it’ll all come out in the wash, though I appreciate it’s one thing after another at the moment it will pass and the meat will be fine, the showers will get fixed and Christmas will happen. But give yourself a break, ask for help and remember ‘good enough’ really is good enough.
Hope you feel better soon.

The pork leg that broke the camel's back.

It's funny really, and you describing it lurking ominously in your fridge really amused me.

You're coping really well.

I once sat and sobbed for an hour, because I could not find the keys to take the bike rack off the car. Keys that only cost £10 and 48 hours to replace.

In hindsight, it wasn't about the keys at all. It was about the end of 18 months of stress and grief and worry.

One foot in front of the other, next step, next step, next step. That's the way through hell.

Here's hoping your week takes a turn for the better

Try to have some sugar OP, glass of coke or juice etc it always helps me after a seizure.

I hope you feel better soon, a joint of pork will not defeat you! 😀

P.s. slow cooked pulled pork is super easy and delicious.

Have you enough space in your Freezer/containers to portion Sir Pork Leg and dish in a few potatoes and gravy and trimmings so that you can enjoy throughout our inevitable lockdown?

'good enough' really is good enough

Absolutely, stop putting more pressure on yourself Op. You need to de stress and look after yourself. And no you don't need to "hang those pictures you've been meaning to sort out" !

I don't suppose the tradesman gave a moment's thought to you being in your pyjamas.

it's the little things ...

• discovering today that a car tire has a slow puncture
• 'someone' opened up the packet of Aunt Bessies Yorkshires (for Xmas day) ate some and didn't reseal the packet so they might be a bit on the weird side when I cook them.
• there's a mouse behind the dishwasher, the cat is disinterested, the dog couldn't be arsed when it ran in front of her nose - because she was eating (more worried it would take her food I think).

@cottonwoolbrain
Ugh...I feel your pain.

I noticed one year how chilly DS's bedroom was ..Breath plumingly cold.

Tried bleeding radiator...No joy.

Called out plumber.. £180.
He said ''Your system is really outdated, you'd be better off getting a combi boiler ''......

He spent hours trying to fix it. so in the end I paid for a new system..water tanks taken out, and hot water every time you turn on the hot tap... Bliss.

I was horrified at the expense, but in retrospect, well worth it.

Don't worry about how you look... as long as they get paid, and get tea/coffee they really don't care how you look.

DS does work for clients which involves going to their homes, and all he ever mentions is if they have a nice dog, or if they were extra generous and offered a plate of sandwiches and a cup of hot tea!

Never have I heard him or colleagues mention a woman's appearance.

Alternatively freeze the pork leg until Easter? Try to pick up some gammon in a shop between now and Friday?

PS just saw you didn’t eat and have absences after a seizure.

Please re-order your list with

1. Eat (and drink)
2. Ask elder sibling to watch something on tv with younger while you have a nap.

Things will look better when you have had some food and rest. Seizures are (can be) exhausting and disorienting so give yourself a break. Christmas is days away so you have time in your side.

And if pork is pissing you off, stick it on Olio, make someone else’s day and put it behind you.

Cook the turkey Christmas Eve, and put the pork in around 11 on Christmas Day, ready for when DSS gets to you in the evening- slow cooked pork is just wonderful.
Everyone who's there Christmas morning/lunchtime gets turkey sandwiches etc, hot meal at supper time.

My friend was always starving after a seizure (often the only way she realised she'd had one) so make sure you eat lots of lovely things today while you put your feet up and Google slow cooked pork timings

Cook your big pork, then slice it up, and distribute it to all the needy people in your area, then you might forget about the rest of your problems.

Distribute your pork to the needy How pious.