What’s your “ How did this crap get published?!” book?

[MrsGrindah]

Just finished The Pretenders by Agatha Zaza. Gosh it was dreadful.Cannot understand how drivel like that gets a publishing deal. There was a scene where, in the middle of a “ dramatic” moment, one of the side characters crosses the room to his wife and “ took hold of the corner of her blouse” . What?! Who does that?! I can’t even picture it.

Agree with Martina Cole books - I read one of her earlier books and that was entertaining enough, then got given a pile if them by my auntie - the later ones are absolute drivel, she clearly can't be arsed to come up with a new plot and characters each time so recycles everything at random until the books are nothing but plot holes.
I like some of the other books mentioned on here though - really enjoyed where the crawdads sing, also the goldfinch (though I know that's a marmite book)

I also read about 10 pages of A Clockwork Orange. A load of incomprehensible nonsense.

Ruth Jones wrote an utterly shite book called Never Greener. Was really disappointed in her - thought it would be much better and more literate.

Wolf Hall. I cannot be doing with first person present tense narratives. Gave in around page 24. It was annoying as clearly the research had been done, which is the reason I normally give up on historicals. If it's a period I know a good amount about, I will normally chuck it the moment the first potato appears pre-1580's ish, and so on! As a TV series it was brilliant.

50 shades...so dire I gave up.

DH did an MFA in Creative Writing. The majority of published authors seem to be either the family of people working in journalism or publishing (children, spouses, in laws), or already have a proven fan base (Mrs Hinch, Twilight). It isn’t down to writing ability, publishers get sent thousands of unsolicited books so they basically don’t read them.

Also any of the last half dozen or so by Phillippa Gregory. And the final four Harry Potters. Her editor at Bloomsbury was clearly scared to wield the red pencil and get her to cut them down to a manageable size.

@LadyJaye

The Midnight Library by Matt Haig - brilliant premise ruined by terrible writing and a protagonist so unsympathetic I wouldn't have weed on them if they were on fire.

However, a marvellous triumph of hype (and the machinations of the publishing industry) over substance.

Oh no! This is top of my To Read list!

The Terracotta Dog by Andrea Camilleri. I've never been able to watch any Mobtalbano after reading this sexist, dated, offensive shit

Don't read The Midwinter Promise by Lulu something.
Romantic drivel, centred round someone with a fear of pregnancy, which is not mentioned on the jacket anywhere. It's not only key to the story, the details could easily traumatise anyone of child-bearing age.

@LadyJaye

The Midnight Library by Matt Haig - brilliant premise ruined by terrible writing and a protagonist so unsympathetic I wouldn't have weed on them if they were on fire.

However, a marvellous triumph of hype (and the machinations of the publishing industry) over substance.

I forgot this one. I read it on holiday. It almost made me chuck my Kindle into the pool

I read a terrible book called housekeeping many years ago, cannot remember the author but I gave up 100 pages in as they were still describing the house. Also NW by Zadie Smith, I had no idea what was going on!

A little life.

Anything by Sophie Hannah. I read about 3, fooled by the exciting premise of the blurb. Each book was a load of convoluted nonsense that gave me a headache, I've learnt my lesson now.

The Cherry Tree Cafe by Heidi Swain. I've not read anything else by her but I thought it was badly written. There was another one that was awful that I read recently. One where the husband finds people for his wife to kill then she tries to kill him... or something like that. Will have a Google.

One where the husband finds people for his wife to kill then she tries to kill him.

Is that 'My Lovely Wife'?

@NeedToKnow101

A little life.

Anything by Sophie Hannah. I read about 3, fooled by the exciting premise of the blurb. Each book was a load of convoluted nonsense that gave me a headache, I've learnt my lesson now.

Whenever I see a troll thread on here with a complicated backstory I always wonder if it's Sophie Hannah doing some research!

My Lovely Wife by Samantha Downing.

The slap. Can't remember the author but it was terrible

Everything by Laura Jane Williams

50 shades was truly dire. Of course, I haven't read it - I'm still traumatised by finding out that my mother has read it.

My mum declared she'd read more saucy sex scenes in Danielle Steel books. Wasn't sure what the appropriate response to that or when my Dad followed it up with "good for you dear" 🙈

The DaVinci Code. Utter tripe.

In non-Covid times, I buy a lot of books from charity shops and there are always multiple copies of 50 Shades and its sequel. The Da Vinci Code is another charity-shop shelf-lingerer. Funnily enough, they never have that battered, creased-spine look of eagerly-devoured books. Flicking through my sister's copy of Fifty Shades was all the acquaintance I needed with that particular masterpiece.

I liked the da Vinci code! It was just throw away fiction.
I agree that the niccki French novels tend to get bogged down a lot. Start off ok but a series soon becomes a bit tedious. The
Same with Peter James novels. I gave up years ago.

Haven’t read the whole thread but I am delighted that Labryinth by Kate Mosse was one of the first replies. I read it years ago and am still resentful of the time I wasted on it. Drivel.

Mrs. Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children - it was meant to be set in Wales, the author had clearly never been anywhere near Wales. The written accents were completely wrong, as was the geography. Why set it in a country he knew nothing about?

I liked The Crawdads though, I didn’t realise they were making it into a film, and I also liked the ‘monkey sister’ book.