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What’s your honest opinion...

70 replies

BillieBlack · 04/12/2020 21:35

If you saw a young adolescent male with long hair (past shoulders), rose gold glasses, and a pink coat what would think? Honestly.

OP posts:
thosetalesofunexpected · 05/12/2020 02:47

Hi Op
Our society is more open minded than used to be,
Obviously there are a few Arsehole judgemental around still

Your son should be,dress as he pleases, please only individual he sees in the mirror.
He will soon find his tribe, I mean people who think in a similar way to him.
Nothing wrong with being a bit different,boring world it would be if everybody was the same.

Sexnotgender · 05/12/2020 07:42

@BaNsh

I would think he is gay or trans or has some identity and sexuality crisis. I would think he must have hippy parents, maybe he self harms and has mental illness.
Fucking hell. No wonder people are so messed up.

They’re just clothes. Seriously a boy wears pink so he must be transConfused have a word with yourself.

SurreyHillsGirl · 05/12/2020 07:48

Wouldn’t bat an eyelid. But MN isn’t really your target audience as we are all so cool on here, no one is going to say, ‘I would think he is gay’ or whatever ignoramuses or bigots might think.

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SurreyHillsGirl · 05/12/2020 07:49

Oh no I was wrong, someone did actually say that Hmm

Snakeplisskensmum · 05/12/2020 08:28

It's always the older generation that have these opinions, I don't think the younger care as much?
My son decided he wanted a pink hoody at 13...we'd never done gender based colours so I bought him one and he wore it without any issues at all. Apart from my Dad who thought he looked 'gay' 🙄 my son just laughed at him and told him that his opinion didn't count as he's dinosaur 😂

Sexnotgender · 05/12/2020 08:30

Apart from my Dad who thought he looked 'gay' 🙄 my son just laughed at him and told him that his opinion didn't count as he's dinosaur

Whilst your dad was obviously in the wrong I wouldn’t be laughing and encouraging ageism by your child.

DinosApple · 05/12/2020 08:31

That's the sort of thing my brother would wear. He's arty, 6ft4, long hair, tash, sometimes pinches his girlfriend's clothes - coats, scarves especially. How is your son at standing up for himself? It's a tricky road to tread.

Dbro literally gives no fucks and wears what he wants, is confident in his heterosexuality and outspoken. His confidence has grown with age (bullied at school), but in arty circles his style is not unusual.

Dbro is good at calling people out on comments- What's it to do with you? And 'You look gay' is met with a withering look and 'And, why do you care? Are you homophobic?'
It definitely helps that he's 6ft 4 to be honest!

Seatime · 05/12/2020 08:57

I think it sounds like a great look and would brighten my day to see. The bullying is another more serious issue. If he knows it will bring more bullying then he understands the consequences. I had quite an extreme 'cure-head' look at one point as a teen and kids on my street would say, 'halloween is over' as l walked by. I was resilient and thought, what a pack of idiots. If he has the courage of his conviction he will be fine. Build up his self esteem by telling him you love him and making a fuss of him. We all need that at times.

SlightDrizzle · 05/12/2020 08:58

@BaNsh

I would think he is gay or trans or has some identity and sexuality crisis. I would think he must have hippy parents, maybe he self harms and has mental illness.
Because he’s wearing a pink coat and has long hair???
TheYearOfSmallThings · 05/12/2020 09:09

Social correctness aside, it would depend where you live and whether he is going to be out on his own wearing this look.

I know plenty of areas where the name calling could easily tip over into physical attack, especially if he walked past a group of teenage boys wanting to impress each other. Even if he looks older, 13 is extremely young to be walking around with a target painted on you.

AhoyMeFarties · 05/12/2020 09:44

@BaNsh

I would think he is gay or trans or has some identity and sexuality crisis. I would think he must have hippy parents, maybe he self harms and has mental illness.
Only on MN 🙄 There is a young man near me who dresses like this. He is absolutely stunning.. The only reason I noticed him was the fact he had the most amazing hair I have ever seen I love a bit of individuality
Waxonwaxoff0 · 05/12/2020 09:50

I'd think it's great. I love people who are confident enough to wear whatever they like even if it is a bit different.

BaNsh · 05/12/2020 10:00

The op asked for honest opinions. That's what I would think and I know i'm not alone. We all judge on first impressions and clothes, particularly such look at me statement choices do send out a message.
He'd get name called and bullied for it, a walking target.
Say within the confines of Goldsmith uni or in Soho he will be right at home with the other gender fluid self hipsters but, I don't know, take the wrong turning in some neighbourhoods and he will get taunted or turned over.
I can only think of liberal, clothes are just clothes, hipster parents that would let him go out like that. Why would you send him out in the world at 13 looking like a walking target.
The fact is he lives in a society where like it or lump it people judge you and treat you according to what you look like. Why anyone would willingly make themselves more of a target baffles me.
A blackor Asian boy would so not get away with it. All those saying its fine i bet are white, live in nice middle class areas. Very priviledged and detached.

FestiveFannyGallops · 05/12/2020 10:12

I'd think good fir him and probably envy his style and confidence. My 5yo ds has long blond hair and one classmate says he looks like a girl but most people just say what beautiful hair he has. It's being cut next week fir the first time since January but I'll still keep it long as he likes it and it suits him.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 05/12/2020 10:23

@BaNsh I'm not middle class nor do I live in a middle class area.

WorraLiberty · 05/12/2020 10:29

A blackor Asian boy would so not get away with it. All those saying its fine i bet are white, live in nice middle class areas. Very priviledged and detached.

Why wouldn't a black or Asian boy 'get away with it' @BaNsh?

BillieBlack · 05/12/2020 15:21

@BaNsh yours is the opinion I was expecting as that is what I’ve mostly encountered.

I can only think of liberal, clothes are just clothes, hipster parents that would let him go out like that.

I’ve never really considered myself to be liberal or hipster but I am of the opinion that clothes are just clothes. I find it a little confusing that its fine for girls to wear khaki/navy/grey but not fine for a boy to wear pink.

OP posts:
BillieBlack · 05/12/2020 15:23

He doesn’t ever leave the house alone, actually he rarely leaves the house at all other than school.

OP posts:
SlightDrizzle · 05/12/2020 15:24

@BaNsh

The op asked for honest opinions. That's what I would think and I know i'm not alone. We all judge on first impressions and clothes, particularly such look at me statement choices do send out a message. He'd get name called and bullied for it, a walking target. Say within the confines of Goldsmith uni or in Soho he will be right at home with the other gender fluid self hipsters but, I don't know, take the wrong turning in some neighbourhoods and he will get taunted or turned over. I can only think of liberal, clothes are just clothes, hipster parents that would let him go out like that. Why would you send him out in the world at 13 looking like a walking target. The fact is he lives in a society where like it or lump it people judge you and treat you according to what you look like. Why anyone would willingly make themselves more of a target baffles me. A blackor Asian boy would so not get away with it. All those saying its fine i bet are white, live in nice middle class areas. Very priviledged and detached.
And the self-harming and mental illness you charmingly bring up in your first post? Hmm
dontgobaconmyheart · 05/12/2020 15:37

I'd probably think it was a cool outfit and envy the confidence to wear it, if I noticed at all. I wouldn't think anything else at all, certainly nothing negative. Someones outfit bears no relation to their sexuality for goodness sake, only an idiot could think it believably does.
OP some members of your family, and some on this thread are just simply homophobic, which is their failing.

It sounds like he will be at home 99% anyway so would his outfit matter in terms of who will see it? I think some context on the type of area you live in and his age would help a bit but there's absolutely nothing wrong in the clothes he wants, or wearing them.

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