That's it in a nutshell really. But here's the long version...
Low level picking has been going on for a while, work with a difficult character, but always managed it just fine. Love my job.
It took on a 'proper' bullying form from Sept/October and have kept a really detailed record as it was getting really bad.
Micromanaging, changing the rules/instructions all the time, making my head spin, personal remarks at times. Walking on egg shells every day for 8 hours.
Got moved by bully 1 up into another office to do one part of my job (this felt like a form of punishment) and then told to return once job was job. I loved working up in new office as wasn't getting bullied by anyone. It was bliss. Other people started to comment on my job (data related) being so much better now I'm out of the very busy environment with bully 1 that I was in before. Many staff said it was a brilliant idea to do the data part in a quiet area. I was very pleased.
On returning from my nice new office, back to where I was before with bully 1, the atmosphere is palpable. Silent treatment, answering anything I say with 'whatever' or 'doesn't matter' or 'who cares'. She is an angry person. The days drag. I don't want to be there.
But I keep going. I even ask her what's wrong several times, she shrugs with 'it is what it is'. I ask if she wants me back to work earlier (it's busy in our roles) and she says 'it doesn't work like that'. I try to see how I can appease her. It falls on deaf ears.
I remain doing my part 1 job elsewhere (half the day I am happy) then return to the horrible atmosphere where I do everything 'wrong' for the rest of the day.
Then one day HR appear when I'm coming down from job 1 and says in front of anyone walking in/out 'what is taking so long, why are you taking this long'. It's 2 on 1 in a public place, asking me why I'm not doing my job quick enough (no time frame had been set - I was doing my job neither rushed or slow, just normal).
I defended my position and said how everyone thought it was so much better now, but the two of them were quite pushy/aggressive with how they spoke to me. I said I felt really confident if ofsted were to walk in now, my data would be spot on. I got told by bully 1 'that's got nothing to do with you' (the week before, she had said 'don't throw that very old paperwork out, you'll need that for ofsted) - just one example of the rules always changing to suit. Head spin.
Anyway. I spoke to Bully 2 (HR) who just happens to be besties with Bully 1, outside (with people walking past) and said how horrible the atmosphere was and how Bully 1 had been really difficult to work with. She said talk it out with her, get a third party as well (her!)
I went back and spoke to Bully 1. I explained how difficult things had been lately and felt terrible if I'd left her in the lurch, but was doing my data part of my job so much better. It was a good chat. Bully 1 was actually very positive. Said she felt so much better for talking. She said 'let's carry on as normal, you do data and come back when you're ready, no issues'.
All over. Phew.
Back in the next day, it's gone from really bad to really really bad. Atmosphere is horrendous, and she is one angry lady.
She demands I stay with her. I say I'm behind with data now (we had something serious happen that needed sorting out) and she said 'it doesn't matter!' I say just let me go for an hour, and she says 'no, you'll stay here'. I say I'd rather work there and she said 'I'll bet you do!' You're staying here.
I had to leave for 5 minutes as I was starting to cry. I went to see the person I had been working with for the data side. She was lovely about everything.
Returned after a few minutes as was panicking about Bully 1 being more angry.
Got on with my day. Very hard.
HR (Bully 2) wants a meeting.
Meeting was over an hour of listing things about me. I got told Bully 1 shouldn't have had to ask me to come back down (from other office) I should have used my empathy skills that they thought I had. I had betrayed Bully 1. I owed Bully 1 everything as she fought for me to get the job, and no one else wanted me. There was a long long list of things (nothing performance related, as I do my job well) but it was all other things, personal as well. She said if I loved the data part so much they might think about readvertising my role and I could reapply for it, but it would only be 10 hours a week!! Said why did I run crying to nice person, now I can't be trusted.
Had to apologise to Bully 1. Felt like I was fighting for my job. I had to say sorry for betraying her and talking to the other person I cried to.
I was battered. Started feeling very unwell next day stomach cramps, severe nausea, kept being sick in my mouth (sorry TMI) and migraines etc. Time off for few days and then over weekend my left side arm, left side body went all numb tingly, my heart had been getting faster and faster and my chest was really starting to hurt. Breathing became short. Went to walk in centre, then told to go to A&E. Had ECG. Told to get doctors appt.
Doctor said blood tests, rule out physical things, and then started talking to me about work.
I explained everything. Over the course seeing doctors, I've seen 6 and they've all said 'that's bullying' you need to escalate this.
On beta blockers now, and been on them for 3 weeks now. Been signed off.
Went to see deputy head, he said you need to take this further. This has happened before and people have left. He doesn't know how Bully 2 still has her job in HR.
So went to Bursar and told him everything. This was informal, and hadn't gone down proper grievance yet. All confidential. No empathy shown, defended Bully 1 (she's very well respected here, and maybe she can be a bit abrupt but she gets things done around here). He was only interested in when I would be returning to work. I said I don't think I can work with Bully 1. 'Oh so your return is based on where you work'
I cried in the meeting as it was quite difficult. It was being suggested it would be easier for my health if I left!
It was also very dismissive and thought it was just a simple spat that could be talked through. Anyway, he said, let's leave it for now, and we'll have another meeting 2 days time.
In 2 days time, I expect he's had a think about my role and whether I can move departments.
This has not happened. He's actually spoken to both Bully 1 and 2, told them I have a complaint about their conduct, and now he wants me to leave with a settlement.
Taking this further will 'cause untold pain to lots of people' and surely I don't want that? Also it won't be good for my health.
He wanted an answer pretty soon, I said no. He said can we have a verbal yes so he can get the paperwork moving, I said no. I need to think.
2 months wages is not enough time to find a job, I'm not even well after all of this (and I am a strong person, have been through a lot, but this has floored me). And why am I going? I get bullied, I say I'm being bullied, then I get asked to leave to prevent heartache to the actual bullies.
Sorry this is so long. If there is anyone out there who can advise or help, or just sympathise would be nice.
Thank you 