For a birthday near Christmas- which one to give “big present” for?

[LittleRa]

DP’s birthday is 16th December. It’s not a “big” birthday this year (i.e. not 30th, 40th etc). I’ve got him one “big” present- an Apple Watch (an older model, not the ridiculously expensive newest one, but still), plus a few smaller things- a hoodie, a board game, large bar of his favourite chocolate.

Should I give the big present for his birthday or for Christmas (and then the smaller presents for the other one)?

PS I don’t want to give the big present as a “joint” Christmas and birthday gift as I’m sure people with December birthdays hate when that happens!

Do you get big presents on both?

I'd go for the birthday, makes it a bit more about him.

DHs birthday is the 15th December, so I relate to your dilemma well.

I'd give the 'big' gift for his Birthday.
Birthdays are solely about the person.It's his special day.
Other gifts for Christmas.

PS I don’t want to give the big present as a “joint” Christmas and birthday gift as I’m sure people with December birthdays hate when that happens!

I actually quite like it. I’ve always appreciated having a birthday near Christmas as it means I can ask for a bigger present combined.

I don’t think it matters which way round. Is he a big fuss birthday kind of person? Does he see Christmas as more for the kids?

If he likes a big fuss over him individually, go for birthday.

@5zeds

Do you get big presents on both?

To be honest we’ve been together four years and we usually always get each other trips or experience type presents. For example for the past four years for his birthday we’ve been to Manchester for the Christmas markets- I’ve paid for train, hotel and meal out for his birthday. Then I get him a physical present for Christmas. This is why this is the first year I’m pondering this! Similarly, my birthday is in August so he usually gets me a summer weekend away or something like that, or we’ll get each other gig tickets or theatre tickets.

Big gift for his Birthday.

I have a December birthday, and would prefer the bigger/most thoughtful gift for birthday.

He’s not really a big birthday or Christmas kind of person, in terms of wanting any kind of fuss for himself. But I’m pregnant and due in March so I feel like it’s the last big present for himself before everything inevitably becomes about the baby (not to mention financially!) I think I’ll go with birthday for the Apple Watch as people have advised and then give the other bits and pieces for Christmas. I think he’ll be surprised at the Watch! He’s getting me blue tooth headphones for Christmas for when I’m holding and feeding the baby all day and night

OP I’m a Christmas Eve baby and I say birthday! Purely because it’s more of a special occasion to me because its more like ‘just my day’ whereas Christmas is all about the family if that makes sense

100% birthday...his special day and you get more presents on Christmas anyways

@5zeds

Do you get big presents on both?

this... isnt it normal to get a 'big' gift on both?

I buy xmas and birthday gifts for adults equally, neither is 'bigger' than the other regardless of a June birthday or a December/January birthday.

Being a December birthday shouldnt mean only one 'big' gift between them so which one doesnt really matter because it seems like your still missing a 'main' gift for the other.

I'm going to go against the grain but we tend to do big gifts at Christmas and smaller things for birthdays.

Birthday all the way. My DM has a Christmas birthday and she's sensitive about her lack of 'special gifts' because nobody bothers because they're Christmas skint or does the whole rolling-into-one thing (whole other thread).

So I give her the special gift for her birthday.

Both! DD2 is actally a Christmas birthday, having been born just when the rest of the country was sitting down to their Christmas dinner.

She eyeballed what her older siblings were getting under the tree and woe betide us if hers didn't add up. She also demanded birthday wrapping paper on the birthday presents so she knew which was for what.

@NewlyGranny

Both! DD2 is actally a Christmas birthday, having been born just when the rest of the country was sitting down to their Christmas dinner.

She eyeballed what her older siblings were getting under the tree and woe betide us if hers didn't add up. She also demanded birthday wrapping paper on the birthday presents so she knew which was for what.

Fair enough

My Dc have bdays on 23rd and 14th. Big pressies are always for birthdays here

I have a December birthday. I would prefer a big present on my birthday than Christmas.

@NewlyGranny

Both! DD2 is actally a Christmas birthday, having been born just when the rest of the country was sitting down to their Christmas dinner.

She eyeballed what her older siblings were getting under the tree and woe betide us if hers didn't add up. She also demanded birthday wrapping paper on the birthday presents so she knew which was for what.

Luckily he’s turning 28 not 8 so hopefully won’t be eyeballing anyone else’s presents With the Apple Watch costing £379 I can’t afford equal gifts for both Christmas and birthday 🙈 I could rethink getting the watch and just give similarly priced gifts for each so it’s not disproportionate, eg hoodie for one and board game for the other?

As I said unthread, we usually give more “experience” based presents for birthdays (weekends away, train tickets, hotel), so it’s hard to compare this year. My birthday was August and he got me a Chilly’s water bottle, a pair of fluffy slipper socks, a nice notebook and pen set and chocolates. For Christmas he’s getting me blue tooth headphones which I’ve asked for.

I don't get the 'but don't you do big presents for both' replies. If the OP and her DP did big presents for both then she wouldn't be posting.

OP Could you do an experience later in the new year once this lifts and then give the watch for christmas? If not then I'd go birthday for the bigger gift.

@LolaSmiles

I don't get the 'but don't you do big presents for both' replies. If the OP and her DP did big presents for both then she wouldn't be posting.

OP Could you do an experience later in the new year once this lifts and then give the watch for christmas? If not then I'd go birthday for the bigger gift.

I’m pregnant and due in March and with all the uncertainty around the restrictions I think I’ll give booking any trips etc a miss I was keeping an eye on things to see if I could make a booking for the tasting menu at a local posh restaurant he wants to try but found out today we’re going into tier 3 so it’s a no go unfortunately.

My birthday is only a few days before Christmas and I would prefer a larger birthday gift than for Christmas please!

@LolaSmiles

I don't get the 'but don't you do big presents for both' replies. If the OP and her DP did big presents for both then she wouldn't be posting.

OP Could you do an experience later in the new year once this lifts and then give the watch for christmas? If not then I'd go birthday for the bigger gift.

If they did big gifts for just one instead of both then she wouldnt be posting because she would know which one is the big gift.

the fact she is asking strongly suggests its common for both but she only got one and now cant decide which ones 'not as important'.

Big presents on both, mine born on 26th and 31st of December, it's not their fault so get treated separately like they were not in December. X

All those saying big gifts for both do you really spend £400 on your DP for both birthday and Christmas?

Surely that ends up equating to buying stuff for the heck of it?

Op I'd go with Christmas, and you can do something for Birthday at some point in summer.