Breaking rule of 6 over Christmas

[SarahSinuses]

Hi, so in my family we will have to break the rule of 6 as there's me, DH, DM, DF, DB, DS and DD (who is only a baby so don't understand why she counts).

We had planned from ages ago to rent a big house so we can spend a week together comfortably because since DD was born we don't really fit in my mum's house.

I was saying to my mum that we have to cancel the rented house stay because there's no way the owners won't ask if we're all from the same household, and just be a little uncomfortable and cosy at her house.

Other option I suppose is to go to Wales where children don't count.

So, what should we do?

1. Go as planned to the house already booked
2. Cancel and stay at my mum's (very crowded)
3. Cancel and book in Wales where children don't count (lose lots of money probably)

Thank you!

@userxx
But we're not talking here of an individual that lives alone and is entitled to form a support bubble are we?
The issue here is that many people 'HAVE' to break the law of 6 because they want to spend Xmas with more than 6 of their assorted relatives. 98% of us would probably like to do the same.
Many of us won't though, because it will cause the spread of the virus exponentially.
This doesn't make us 'officious' btw (to the poster who claimed it did). It makes us more conscientious and community minded.
I dread to think what mid January will look like...

If the numbers of the virus are still the same around Christmas I won’t be seeing my parents. Not because of the rules or the tiers or because I think I’m right and everyone else is wrong or because I’m officious or scared. But because I could not live with myself if I gave it to them, and as a younger person who goes out to work in healthcare, with children in school, I recognise I carry a higher risk to them. It’s not community minded or because I never break rules, it’s literally about keeping them safe. It’s easy to get caught up in what’s allowed and what’s not, but the reasons for the rules are more important. I wouldn’t have the whole family descend on vulnerable family members in a place where social distancing wasn’t possible, it feels too risky to me. All parties need to have considered and accepted those risks.

If numbers are looking better and there’s a subsequent relaxing of rules then we’ll meet, but only distanced and we won’t stay at each other’s houses. To me it isn’t worth it.

Tbh OP I don't care if you break the rules, I've broken them plenty myself. It was more the assertion that you "have" to break the rules like that absolves you of any wrongdoing that riled me.

You are going to break the rules/law at Christmas, many others will too, but it's a choice not a necessity.

In the same way as I'm choosing NOT to break the rules. And so are my family. Sad is it is for us, we can't go into eacothers houses.

I'd go for option 1. Go to the house you've booked.

Imagine the spike in mid January if we all broke the rules and had a huge family Christmas. As families tend to celebrate across generations why would anyone want to put their elderly family at higher risk?

So no I don't think everyone will be breaking the rules, if that's how you justify it to yourself then you are foolish.

We've had a rubbish year because of a virus, the government aren't trying to 'ruin' your Christmas, they're trying to keep the death rate as low as possible while maintaining as much of the economy as possible. Grow up!

I think you can cross Wales off your list; we are going into a two week lockdown tomorrow (no meeting outside your household inside or outside and stay at home) and for sure we will have stricter rules than England following on when the two weeks ends.

*Imagine the spike in mid January if we all broke the rules and had a huge family Christmas. As families tend to celebrate across generations why would anyone want to put their elderly family at higher risk?

So no I don't think everyone will be breaking the rules, if that's how you justify it to yourself then you are foolish.

We've had a rubbish year because of a virus, the government aren't trying to 'ruin' your Christmas, they're trying to keep the death rate as low as possible while maintaining as much of the economy as possible. Grow up!*

Thank you. People who are going to break the rules need to imagine how they're going to feel if one of their relatives are one of the people who become ill in January

These family members and elderly people we're planning to spend the holidays with are not passive victims of kidnap you know @Bluesheep8 and others.

They are actively choosing to come together with us. Life is fleeting, something will get you in the end.

We want to be together, it matters to us, because we don't know what's ahead.

Elderly, vulnerable, young, strong. We are actively wanting to come together. So we will.

@worriedandannoyed - the OP has said her father is seriously ill and they expect this to be his last Christmas anyway. Under those circumstances, would dying of covid in January after spending a wonderful last Christmas surrounded by family (including new grandchild) be worse than dying in the spring, having gained a few extra weeks/months by being away from his loved ones?

Quality of life matters. They are only breaking the rules by a baby that's not mobile.

OP - focus on giving your dad the best Christmas, and also giving your mum the best memories of her last Christmas with her DH.

I apologise, my comments are aimed more at these who've said well everyone will be breaking the rules!

I appreciate that, but still dying alone of Covid is a terrible terrible way to go for anyone.

For those saying that in Scotland children don’t count, whilst that’s right you’d be meeting even less of your family as we can only meet with one other household and only outdoors. So before you move location be sure that they don’t have tighter restrictions.

And given none of us know what the restrictions will be at Xmas I’d not be risking loosing more money for something that likely won’t be allowed.

Are you in tier 1?

If so, I would go for it, I can’t get too excited about 7 including a tiny baby.

Just do it, I imagine in the real world most people will spend it with their families. Just the other day there was a similar thread to this and the poster had unanimous support - you’ve obviously got unlucky with the rule police coming out in force.

The rule people?? No. The people who don't think a jan/Feb lockdown will do the nation any good!

Just do whatever you feel is right OP and don't worry about what anyone else thinks. Let those who wish to stick to the rules do so, and you do you.

Hi, so in my family we will have to break the rule of 6

No, no. You won’t have to do anything.

You should be celebrating separately as you cannot have more than six and yes, kids count.

So you’re 6 plus a baby - that’s fine OP.
You may have an issue with the house though. I’d just squash into your mums house.

We’re breaking it. I don’t care. It’s my family, they are paramount.

The sheer childish petulance, and level of denial here is just so depressing.
Remember, if the hospitals are overwealmed, there will be little chance to get medical treatment for any other serious illnesses and accidents that your children, partners, parents and friends may suffer, that require urgent medical treatment.

The hospitals were nowhere near overwhelmed in April @MadinMarch and there is no evidence they will be this time.

@Ecosse
Why are you only mentioning April? In any case, we were all in full lockdown at that time which slowed the exponential growth enormously. Also many more people were following the guidelines during lockdown.
It's not true to say no hospitals were overwealmed. For example:-
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-52812457

We use my parents for childcare as is ‘allowed’ by the rules. Will covid know it’s Xmas then and mean that we shouldn’t meet with the people who look after our kids all the time anyway 🤷‍♀️

Op god knows this might be your last Christmas, just enjoy it and don't give a shit. I will be 7 people altogether for Xmas and if they are locking us up because this virus is so deadly, I'd rather be surrounded by my family one last time during Christmas and die of Covid remembering my perfect memories. You only live once.

We’re breaking it. I don’t care. It’s my family, they are paramount.

Is their health paramount though? How would you feel if one or all of them developed covid? I'm not asking this to be in any way goady, it's just the question I ask myself when I start thinking "well everyone else is breaking the rules"