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Original poster

Am I making my children 'uncool' by making their clothes myself?

91 replies

pastabest · 12/10/2020 22:27

They are 2 and 3.

I love designing and sewing funky leggings and hoodies etc for them but I suspect there is a time limit on how long they and society will find this acceptable.

In my head I'm going to be this cool mum who can whip up a fairy dress or a dinosaur hoodie whilst they are small and move onto creating the latest fashions In the seasons colours for them on a whim for a night out as they hit their teens.

In reality I know wearing homemade clothes would have been social suicide for me from age 5+ when everyone wanted to fit in and wear Nike or look like a spice girl in clothes sourced from New Look.

I've always been a bit awkward (and weird) so don't know if home clothes making is currently still a complete no no or if it's more acceptable these days.

OP posts:

reluctantbrit · 13/10/2020 08:02

Depends on the child and the clothing you make. My mum made lots of summer dresses and skirts for me, always the style I liked and I chose pattern and fabric. So, it worked very well. I have absolute no skills unfortunatley so I didn't continue this.

My friend is a great seamstress and also teaches her DD, they do lots of tops, skirts etc together and it looks great but the girl is not a follower of anything "popular" so I think she isn't bothered that it is not from any in-brand. She is 13 now, it may change at one point.

I would go with the flow, when they get older teach them skills and see if they are happy but maybe mix and match what you do. You will be the envy of school mums. One of DD's classmates is actually a professional seamstress and she was roped often into helping with the annual show costumes and her children had great book day costumes but she was always happy to help others as well when we were stuck.

Catlady6000 · 13/10/2020 08:02

I think when they get to teen years it’s all about how you frame it! When I was in my teens in the 00s my mum made my ‘prom’ (leavers night) dress, after I’d spent months shopping for one and none of them being up to my very fussy taste. My mum made exactly what I wanted, and all my friends were amazed that I had a ‘custom made’ dress for the night. At the time I wished I’d tapped into her skills sooner to make more going out outfits!

RationalOne · 13/10/2020 08:15

My 14 Year old would fly to the moon before she wore something homemade. If it’s not from Urban or Brandi Melville she won’t wear it.

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LadyLoungeALot · 13/10/2020 08:20

Depends on the style. When I was 16, I had a very talented friend who made most of her own clothes and they were fab- we were all jealous!

AdventCaroline · 13/10/2020 08:33

My Dd and her best friend both still love homemade clothes - they are 13.
Dd's friend's mum is a great seamstress, but Dd has to rely on her grandma.

They're not into branded stuff, but they do care a lot about patterns, fabric and cut. They both tend to go for very bold colours, and eye catching patterns, which I think is very unusual for young teens.

MagpieSong · 13/10/2020 08:45

I think it’s about the style and quality. If you’re great at making clothes and choose styles that are in keeping with what’s cool (not necessarily on trend as some items are cool without being on trend) then it’s fine. I wouldn’t want a child who was that bothered about labels. There are plenty of designers who made or altered clothes as kids, its possible your kids will see you making things and want to learn. Also, it depends on who and what is cool in your school. The hippie or boho look was in when I was a teen, so easy to make clothes to suit that!

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 13/10/2020 08:50

I’ve got a degree in fashion and worked as a pattern cutter for years. I can pretty much sew or knit anything.

Dd 14 would not wear anything l made. End of conversation!😁

ghostmous3 · 13/10/2020 08:52

Once they reach 8 to 10 then they will turn thier nose up at handmade clothes

I'll never forget one lad I went to school with in year 8. Not only did he have the humiliation of his mum being a teacher at the school but he also had the added mortification of his mum knitting the school jumper complete with logo.

He wore it once and never wore it again. I felt sorry for his mum all that hard work but ohh poor lad 🙈

RainingBatsAndFrogs · 13/10/2020 08:53

What a fantastic skill to have!

Stay responsive to your kids, they will probably go in and out of wanting home made clothes, and you might need to respond to their idea of style rather than your creations.

But that is the same with bought clothes: kids reach an age where their own taste matters.

If they turn into arty / boho chic / steam punk/ some East Asian fashion that I can’t remember the name of they may end up begging you to make clothes.

But do not expect your Yr 7 to want to go to a classmate’s birthday in patchwork dungarees.

31133004Taff · 13/10/2020 08:55

@pastabest - sounds like you’re switched on to what your children might opt for and respect their choices. Enjoy this while you can. Life comes full circle. You hear of so many brides thrilled to walk down the aisle in a dress handmade by the matriarch.

Myglorioushairdo · 13/10/2020 08:56

I think it's completely fine until your children ask for something else to wear. Let them decide and don't force. They'll be OK. Happy sewing 😁

terrywynne · 13/10/2020 09:01

I had homemade clothes as a child and as pp have said a lot of it comes down to style and skill. Some things were less of a bit as a I got older. Skirts I carried in wearing on wearing homemade ones until I was at university! I loved having the best costumes for school plays or fancy dress into secondary school. And I had homemade ball gowns at sixth form and university - unique and could get a good fit!

Key was that I did have shop bought clothes too! And as I got older I was allowed to choose patterns and fabric (with guidance as to what fabric would work/be an appropriate skill level).

formerbabe · 13/10/2020 09:05

My DD is ten and would love homemade clothes.

My ds is 12 and would probably run away from home if I made him clothes. He only wears black and white in synthetic fabrics from sports shops

MinesAPintOfTea · 13/10/2020 09:09

At 8 DS still demands to know if things are being made for him (no, the floral liberty fabric is for me...) He loves quite a few things I've made and wears them all frequently. Pre-covid he used to come fabric shopping with me to pick what fabric he wanted, and he makes some things for himself (with the machine on tortoise).

When he stops being keen, I'll not force the issue, but right now it's far better than when he was a toddler because he appreciates cool clothes

We have had to have a chat that I'd rather patch clothes up than see things go unworn though

GameSetMatch · 13/10/2020 09:20

At 2 and 3 I doubt you children care if they are ‘uncool’ as they probably wee themselves often so it’s hard to be cool! Just make them clothes if you enjoy it until one expresses they want shop bought clothes. My six year old would love a handmade dinosaur hoodie but probably wouldn’t want handmade jeans. Just go with the flow.

Jeremyironseverything · 13/10/2020 09:26

You'll be able to make book day costumes, and costumes for the history trips etc. There will be plenty of dress up days at primary.

Original poster

pastabest · 13/10/2020 09:30

Thanks all

I think most of the clothes I make would pass for shop bought unless you looked at the seams on the inside

I mostly make hoodies Tshirts and leggings in plain or patterned stretchy fabrics. The 3 year old is very opinionated about clothes and chooses her own fabric - she's made some odd choices that have ended up looking great, like some leggings from some leftover fabric from some black and gold fabric I made a top for my mum from!

I tend to make them a lot of dark coloured, clothing as an alternative to all the frilly pink and purple that's in the shops. I use modern patterns from Ellie and Mac, Made by Jacks Mum, Patterns for Pirates etc so fashionable cuts etc.

To everyone that's saying it's an amazing skill and they wish they could do it - as long as you have even a basic sewing machine it's ridiculously simple once you know the basics and all of the patterns companies I mention above all have very detailed simple instructions that take you through every step, even which type of fabric to buy. Give it a go! It's addictive...

OP posts:

Bluntness100 · 13/10/2020 09:32

This depends. If they look home made then yes, it’s social suicide. If they look professionally made then it’s no issue, no one is going to know.

The issue I suspect is they look home made, or you’d not ask the question?

earthycarrots · 13/10/2020 09:34

It wasn't cool back in the 1970s and 1980s so I doubt it is now.

sashh · 13/10/2020 09:36

I didn't have many home made clothes but I had some and learned to sew. As a teen I started making my own clothes.

As kids get older they do want to wear what their peers wear, but they still want funky cushions and bedding.

But then they still want world book day outfits and then it's prom. Some spectacular prom dresses are actually really simple.

If you can sew you can also create things that can adapt, so a prom dress that is actually 2 pieces with shorts underneath so you can go from prom to a nightclub by removing a skirt.

And never underestimate the cool factor that CAN come from different clothes.

This goes back 20+ years ago my friend took her daughter to a party, the dd was about 12 and had recently been a bridesmaid so wore her bridesmaid dress. My friend looked around at the party and all the other girls wearing short skirts, with handbags and thought, "I'm going to have to take her home to get changed", but the girl whose party it was went, "Wow DD you look like a princess", cue the party girls circling her to see her 'princess' dress.

Obviously it would have gone wither way.

Hardbackwriter · 13/10/2020 09:37

In that case I think you probably have more time than if you were making more 'quirky' stuff or using less 'normal' fabric - it's the stiff fabric and cut of a lot of home-made stuff that makes it look obviously different, which can be either a great and deliberate look or an embarrassment, depending on your point of view!

Ultimately, though, I think you just have to listen to them as they get older and although it's fine to let them know that you enjoy making the clothes don't make them feel that you're so invested/proud that you'd be really hurt if they want shop-bought instead - it's all very well to say 'well they never said they didn't want to wear them' but that's not an easy thing to do for some personality types if mum's making it clear that she'll be devastated if you reject her lovingly-made creations.

IkaBaar · 13/10/2020 09:48

My DM has kept herself busy in lockdown making clothes for DDs’ dolls. She even made slings for DDs to carry them in. If they won’t wear the clothes you make as they get older you could always make stuff for their dolls. Apparently the swimwear was partially challenging!

MasksGlovesSoapScrubs · 13/10/2020 09:50

No. I love a funky pair of leggings for DS or dungarees.

BlueJava · 13/10/2020 10:09

I think it depends on the child. Some want the latest Superdry or Vans or whatever, my neice sews her own which I think is amazing!

Frenchfancy · 13/10/2020 10:14

I make all my own clothes and make for my teen Dds but only if they ask.

Dd2 (19) loves chiffon type shirts so I make her about 1 à year. I also make her PJs. The latest set had dinosaurs in spacesuits on the top which she loves so much she wears it as a t-shirt.

DD3 tends towards hoodie and her favourite is on I made. I also make her jumpsuits as she is tall and it is hard to find ones that fit.

Tbh I limit what I sew for them because I am a selfish seamstress and I prefer to use my limited sewing time sewing for me.

I always found sewing for young children a thankless task, they grow out of clothes so quickly and don't really appreciate good fit and great workmanship.

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