Am I making my children 'uncool' by making their clothes myself?

[pastabest]

They are 2 and 3.

I love designing and sewing funky leggings and hoodies etc for them but I suspect there is a time limit on how long they and society will find this acceptable.

In my head I'm going to be this cool mum who can whip up a fairy dress or a dinosaur hoodie whilst they are small and move onto creating the latest fashions In the seasons colours for them on a whim for a night out as they hit their teens.

In reality I know wearing homemade clothes would have been social suicide for me from age 5+ when everyone wanted to fit in and wear Nike or look like a spice girl in clothes sourced from New Look.

I've always been a bit awkward (and weird) so don't know if home clothes making is currently still a complete no no or if it's more acceptable these days.

@movingonup20

Depends - my dd loves quirky so at 10 I taught her to sew, she's made dresses, tops etc. even an evening dress, and makes patterns

Omg that’s amazing... I’m totally in awe of your DD ... I can barely thread a needle 🤦‍♀️ I’d love to have that talent - well done !

My friend had some really funky home made dungarees when we were teenagers. She chose the fabric and style) Her parents also made her prom dress.

Once they start school, its time to stop. Thats when other kids will start noticing and as much as we would alike to live in a fairytale world where no one ever gets bullied, thats not real life and they will get picked on.

You might find as you are a mum that's quite into they are into it too (or it might be the opposite!)

Mine like sewing with me.

Even if they stop wanting handmade clothes for every day wear, I bet they will love your skills around Halloween. You will be able to make them some great stuff!

And you can always make stuff to give to friends with younger children.

I think making your children's clothes is a clever and creative thing to do and I admire you for it. I would say to mix and match with other clothes and this will showcase your talents rather than make them feel not like their friends it will actually enhance their look.
Bravo you x

I think it depends on how good you are, to be honest. I know my children wouldn't have thanked me for home made clothes as my sewing is very amateur, but if you can make clothes that look like they're from a shop, you'll be fine. Are you able to replicate clothes that they'd see in a shop?

I really strongly disagree that primary age kids get bullied over their clothes.

My kids have been at two different primary schools. One was massively failing with a deprived catchment and the other was pretty posh. At neither did anyone get bullied over the clothes they wore.

If they are being bullied anyway it might be something that gets used. But if they are not already a target clothes do not make you one.

It's like names, when I was at school every other girl had the same name so if yours was really unusual you really stuck out. Now it's rare to have a single repeat of a name in one class, so an unusual name doesn't really phase them and won't be noticed by kids. (Unless you live somewhere really unusually homogenous)

Basically, ignore the doom mongers.

It really depends on the style I think. My mum was an amazing seamstress who made wedding dresses and ball gowns. She used to make me dresses when I was younger and I hated it. But, the dresses she made for me were flouncy velvet and tartan numbers. I looked like a mini member of the Tudor dynasty, not a great look for Glasgow circa 1989s. 🤣

*1980s. Lol

@FlaviaAlbiaWantsLangClegBack - OMG, did you really design and knit a jumper with a dinosaur fighting a shark?! I am in AWE!! Any chance of a picture?

If you bring them up with an appreciation for the art of dressmaking you might be surprised. My mum is a fantastic seamstress and has made stuff for my sister and I our whole lives. When we were little she used to make us dresses for our Christmas parties then when we were teenagers she made our dresses for school discos and Christmas dances. She made my prom dress, my 18th birthday party dress, my 21st birthday party dress, my 30th birthday party dress, my pre-wedding dinner dress (she drew the line at my actual wedding dress although it was discussed!). When I was younger I would choose the patterns and the fabrics and as I got older I would draw a picture of a dress and mum would take bits from different patterns she had to make it for me. Now my sister and I have kids she’s made christening outfits, cardigans, baby shoes, you name it. She also makes us cushions, blinds and curtains for our houses - honestly she’s so talented and I’ve never (regardless of age) felt remotely embarrassed to be wearing something she has made me and proudly tell people who compliment me!

At 2 and 3 only you care.

At 12 and 13 it would be different.

I did make some fancy dress and world book day costumes which my kids loved until they got up age 7ish

If they are being bullied anyway it might be something that gets used. But if they are not already a target clothes do not make you one.

Dont bet on that. Not all schools but some are all about whats worn.
I had a lot of 2nd hand/patched up/ no name clothes and shoes in late primary school, was bullied for it.
High school came, i demanded i got my school pants from same shop others did, a NEW school top, cool looking shoes, no issues, largely same group who bullied me at primary school went to same high school.
The new targets were the ones with the uncool, school issue pants, the no name shoes, the 2nd hand school top.

I buy dd what she wants. Id not bother making her clothes cos for me not having right stuff was social suicide and i will do what i can to avoid that for dd

Oh, they're two and three! You're fine for a while.

My DD is three and her mother, my mother, and I all make her clothes, so she's drowning in home-made stuff.

Although my DD is tiny, I get the impression all of this is more acceptable than it was when I was little, because patterns have just got so much better. When my mum was making me clothes in the early 80s, it was either clothkits (for toddlers) or fuddy-duddy old-fashioned patterns. Now there are much nicer things out there. Also fashions have changed: back when I was little the aesthetic wasn't for home-made stuff, now if you look at children's clothes, even the mainstream brands have lots of things that look as if they could be home made.

I'd say just be ready to buy them tat when they fancy it. Either they'll want what you make or they won't, but they have to have the contrast to what's available in shops before they'll know.

@FlaviaAlbiaWantsLangClegBack

I knit rather than sew but in my experience they get more demanding and specific about what they want as they get older and get accustomed to what you can do

Why wear a nice Nordic style jumper when he can request a tasteless one with a picture of a dinosaur fighting a shark instead?

I suppose I'll have to wait and see what happens when he hits his teens. Could go either way...

Never seen any teen or tween clothes with dinosaurs fighting sharks, tbh.

Get you child and her friends into making things as it will stem a love of home made

My 10 year old is now giving me requests for his homemade Halloween costume or world book day and I love making them. But normally he won’t even wear the scarves I knit after he was 7.

My 12 still wears & requests the clothes I sew. (As do my younger kids)

It’s more fun now she’s older & will design what she wants (on paper - I draft the pattern).

Be careful what you wish for though; kids that are accustomed to tailored/personalised comfortable clothing can be very judgemental of the poor standards of the high street

Raindropsonrosesand that's his latest request if I can chart something out on graph paper we're both happy with then he can have it, otherwise I'm not spending time knitting something he won't wear!

PickAChew that's something to be thankful for

For older children, it depends on the item, I think....

Dresses, tops and dungarees, ok maybe (so long as the child is happy with it). Jeans, never! A nice pair of (fairly) designer jeans can probably offset a lot of damage from a homemade top or baggy knitted jumper.

My DD is 11 and we make a lot of clothes together but as I almost always wear things I've made myself that fit properly she still likes to be like me. I don't think that will last, I was the same with my mum but stopped sewing or wearing things she had made aged around 12 but came back to dressmaking in my 20s.
I have never made things that are quirky though, I only like to make proper fitting versions of what is fashionable a lot of people seem to think making your own clothes means going around dressed like something from 1955 or standing out some other way. I think it is about looking like everyone else but knowing your seams aren't going to split or fabric go see through.
My 14 year won't entertain the idea of wearing something not from a shop and hasn't done since he was about 8. He even used to hide his homemade quilt when he had a friend round.

I reckon you'll be fine into their primary school years.

Fashion is a lot more fluid and personalised than it was in my 80s/90s childhood. Plus back then the patterns avaliable hadn't moved on since some vague point between the 50s-70s.

DM made me a dress when I was 10 and she did a really good job.the pattern was age appropriate, and she got a lovely soft cordouroy that was socially acceptable.
I still remember the silky binding that she used over the seams.

I was bullied for clothes in primary school! This was back in the 70's.

I was the one in the Cloth Kits wholesome clothes and the hand-made (expensive but hippy) multicoloured shoes. My peers were in Harrington jackets and drainpipe jeans, certainly by age 9 or 10 anyway.

Just keep talking to your children, so that they can let you know if they want to fit in more or whether they like standing out.