Private School or Reduce Down Mortgage?

[MamaOfWobbles]

If you could afford Private School for your young child but it would mean you couldn't reduce down a 35yr mortgage, what would you do (this is assuming little one is in private school from reception to year 13)? Would you send your child to private school or would you sort the financial security?

Would you always choose private over state if you could afford it? I'm wobbling because in state the reception is just like nursery whereas in private it suddenly seemed so formal.

To me it's a bit like cars, you can make the same journey in an old banger or a brand new car. The journey maybe smoother I'm the new car but the destination is the same.

But that will also depend on what your local options are like and what your childs needs are.

Thanks all - I'm of a similar line of thinking as we're in an area where the schooling is 3 tier (not two unless you go private). So I'm thinking state until Y4, then switch at Y5 (as the middle and upper schools aren't great). Our first schools are all 1 or 2 rated with class sizes of about 17-20 children

It depends on the specific schools available near you. I've taught in state and private schools. The best private school I've taught at was truly wonderful. Worth every penny if you could afford to send your child there. I've taught at another (very well-regarded and expensive) private school where I wouldn't send my dc if yiu paid me. Equally, if you have really good state schools nearby, I wouldn't even consider sending the dc private.

I don’t think private schools have much added value for primary years if your child is bright. I would do a halfway house and pay mortgage down + private from secondary. Use these years to save as much as you can. Some of this will depend on your age and job security / income.

I would definitely choose private school, then focus on your mortgage to get the term down. The difference is significant, moving children in senior is too late in my opinion and a good private senior will be fed by its prep with a long waiting list for anyone else.

How can there only be 17-20 children in a primary school class? I dont think you have that right.

Sara2000 absolutely possible in more rural areas. My DD is in a composite class in Scotland of primary 1-4 and they are still only 18 of them! Between 3 and 5 pupils each intake on average. And we are not even that remote...20 minutes drive to the nearest city and close to 2 big towns.

I think the advice is more private primary for and 11+ area. We are not in an 11+ area and I wanted dd to go to private secondary. But she refused to go. Her secondary school is outstanding and very good.

I’d rather give my child a secure home than a potentially better education. Is your state provision utterly terrible for your child ? I’m not convinced by the thinking that private education is always superior to state. If private education was the best fir my child - having looked at other options - I’d consider it, but all things being equal, I’d go with the mortgage.

I've always been keen to send ours private from secondary but this
From my close friend who went to private, I get the impression that unless you’re very well off and live the lifestyle of those who easily afford private, it’s not a very nice environment friendship wise. Her parents earned a decent amount but she always felt like the “poor” kid because she didn’t live the same lifestyle outside of school. is my husband's kicker in his argument against. We have a comfortable lifestyle, this includes over paying on the mortgage every month. If they went private, all of that would stop. Yes, they'd be at private school, but they would be the 'poor' kids as all the money would go on fees.
We are very fortunate to have two excellent secondary schools within a five minute walk (people from neighbouring villages that send their children to prep schools tend to come back to state for secondary round here), so my DC are in the fortunate position of getting an excellent education and also having the experiences that we can provide for them.

In your position, I would find a good state school and reduce the mortgage and look at how you can provide the extracurricular activities they may get at private school.

Working in education, I would not invest in private school until your child has been in a good state school for several years of primary and the teachers there - who will generally have more experience with SEN and diversity - have told you, no holds barred, what your child is like as a student. Otherwise, how do you know what sort of school to choose? I would want, for example, to send a dyslexic child private if I could afford it, but I would likely be looking for a very different school than if I had a not-too-academic-but-v-sporty child, or if I had a budding physicist with autism.

Pay down the mortgage until you know what to your dc needs.

As someone who has taught in both (2 private, a grammar and 3 state schools) I wouldn’t bother with private until secondary school. I see it as a waste of money, however I have seen the benefits of private and would like to send mine private when they hit secondary age if I can afford it despite currently teaching in state.

The 7 years of mortgage repayment time it will give you will also benefit you all financially

It would depend on the specific school. Personally unless the state school was not good, I would try it out and see if I could supplement with tutors outside.

I was very lucky to go to a good private school and loved it. But it is much more expensive now - and unless I could comfortably afford it for all my children or there was a specific educational need, I wouldn’t consider it.

Sara2000 in rural areas that can happen if the number of primary age children in the area reduces over time. There's an outstanding state primary near me which currently has 24 in its largest class.

@Sara2000 we're rural and so the schools are small. We do have a few ones that take the full 30 in a year but that's rare around here

Op like others say, do state till 8 then re assess.

I would like to challenge calligraphy however on state teachers knowing more about sen.
My dd has been struggling in reception, she's now in year 3. Loads of teachers had her and not one raised anything with me at all.
I had to pay outside tutors who happened to be ex private teaches who immediately got visual aids out. Told me to get x y and z checked and have actually helped me to understand and help my child.
. Since then I had connected with so many other dp who say state school has left them in the dark, teaches don't know anything about sen, no one knows what to do.

So I wouldn't relax or put any faith at all in the state school teachers recognising any sen.

My grandfather used to say to his (4) children: "I cannot leave you x thousand a year, but I can educate you to earn it."
This mantra has been passed down through the family over the generations.
As regards schools, I would select the one that "suits" your child best and fits with your ethos and values.

PS re dc not being able to keep up financially out of school, I find this comes from the parents not the other way around.
I've never known children choose friends based on how big their houses are or whether they ski.

Friends at dc level at least, doesn't work like that.

Yy fraught, at the end of the day its what suits the child.

I would pay for private school.

Get him in your local state school for the first few years in order to build strong local friendships

Private, always private. All schools can change drastically in a short time, so the excellent primary your child joined at reception can be shit come year 6, but with state you are stuck. If a school goes down, everyone tries to get out so there are no spaces. If the school is great but doesn’t fit your child, it can get very hard to get a place somewhere else, its potluck. With private, you are in control. You can select the school best for your child, and as a paying customer your chances of being heard are much much bigger.
Plus smaller class sizes, better extra curricular activities etc

Requiring a 35 year mortgage suggests you cant afford private education? Certainly not at this point in time.
Go state until the end of primary and then asses your options at that time.
In the meantime work on shortening that mortgage term as your paying way over the odds in extra £££ than if you borrowed the same amount over say 25 years.
With mortgages the name of the game is to borrow over the shortest amount of time possible.

I'm amazed at the stereotype people still believe about private schools. They are nit filled with children whose parents are loaded. They are not filled with snobs.
If there are good state schools nearby and you think your child will do well send them there. If as time goes by your financial situation changes and the schools later on are not so good, then you can go private. It's not either/or.

What is you motivation behind it?

I struggled to put my child through private school because of the smaller class sizes, she was very quiet, the youngest and struggled with confidence so I thought it would be best, maybe it was?

Academically she is of no advantage, she passed a handful of GCSEs so it depends what you want and if your child doesn’t come out with it brilliant set of results you can’t hold it against them for your decision to send them.

I’d probably be mortgage free now but nowhere close and currently downsizing to try and reduce my mortgage so I’ll be in a better position in 10 years time.