What’s the worst piece of advice you’ve been given?

[TheGeoffLinton]

Inspired by hearing this on a podcast, but now I can’t actually think of mine!

My mum's best mate did my then boyfriend's and my horoscopes. Most perfectly aligned charts she'd ever seen. Soulmates.

No... twat. And now exH.

Married to a Gemini now, wildly astrologically unsuited. I quite like this one.

With primary school bullies - just ignore them they'll get bored.

Reader, they did not get bored.

They simmered down a bit after I smacked one on the nose though

Don’t go to uni, become an Avon lady. My dad’s advice to me circa 1985.

@Carrive MILs..
No. Your mil.

@underneaththeash

Not for me, but I've heard two both in baby clinic several years ago: 1; Mum: She's feeding constantly at night all through the night constantly, I've not had any sleep for 3 nights...La Leche League Zombie - That's normal, it will pass they are just getting up your milk supply. (mum crashed car the following day with both baby and daughter in it going to school). This wasn't me.

1. Mum: My eight month old's eye seems to be pointing out sometimes, is that anything to worry about.

Health Visitor: No, Me (Optometrist) - runs after mum and says yes, you need to be referred.

This is true though

MiL: put salt on your birth wounds.
Me: No.
That was that!

That I should ask the doctor to test my 20month old for ADHD and autism because she fights her sleep, sometimes wakes in the night (I massively stress the work sometimes she sleeps through mostly) and is overall too giddy

MIL also told DH he shouldn’t tell anyone he’s got depression because it’s embarrassing not just did him but for the family

MIL- you should cut the Lo's onesies by the ankles so he could wear it next year too and it will save us buying new ones

Why is this terrible advice - I did this! He went through a phase of being long and thin and anything that fitted his body his poor wee legs couldn’t stretch out.

Some of this “advice” is things I did and worked though. Definitely found mixed feeding worked and boobs adjusted, definitely cut feet off baby grows to make them last, would expect the driver not to drive if too tired, salty water was suggested post birth by the hospital...

My therapist told me to have a child as it would improve my mental health. It didn't...

Ignore the bullies they are just jealous.

Sleep when the baby sleeps. Totally unrealistic.

Go to baby groups and nct classes. For me it had the opposite effect. It made me feel so shit and inadequate.

Being vegan helps your weight stay low. Bollocks. i gained so much and felt so ill and lethargic.

A white shirt is a wardrobe must.

Curly hair is umprofessional. Long hair doesn't suit mums or over 30s.

Oh and weight falls off when breastfeeding. Some women on here say this is true but it wasnt for me so im putting it down as shit advice.

Just ignore this person/people/issue/incident and focus on something else.
Never works for anything, ever.

Don’t have children they will wreck your life and you just aren’t suited to children

Didn’t have dd till late 30s and found I loved being a mother and dd and Ds are the best thing I have ever done.

Wished I had started earlier

First baby slept through the night at 5 weeks, health visitor (with no children) wake the baby or it will not get enough milk. I refused, the baby is now a healthy 6 year old.

To fix my abusive marriage.

When late dh was experiencing psychosis and I was still in the grip of addiction my mother told me to have a child with him, "It will bond you!" Thankfully I didn't take it.

Dont worry about it...

Oh, thanks! Youve solved everything!

Marry him. Ruined my fucking life

From dd teachers in reception and year 1, to wait and see if she catches up and clicks
She needed interventions back then and is thriving now with proper help from outside tutors.

Awful advice from actually teachers with no right to give that advice because they have absolutely no experience in sen!!

Second to buy a diesel car, pumps out utter muck, dd has asthma issues etc.

@clumsyv

MIL- you should cut the Lo's onesies by the ankles so he could wear it next year too and it will save us buying new ones🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Nothing wrong with that advice. Why wouldn't you do that?

Don’t go to university its a waste of time and money.

Don't stop smoking or you will have a huge baby and high blood pressure.
A nip of brandy each night kills bugs and germs so no colds.
Bite them back of they nip while feeding.

My mum

"What about being an air hostess?" - my careers teacher at school when I said I wanted to either be a dairy farmer or a writer.

You cannot IMAGINE anyone less suited to being cabin crew than me. (Although I did make a damn good dairy farmer and now write books...)