If you don’t let your kids watch telly - please tell me HOW YOU DO IT!

[Mhschoolq]

After lockdown and trying to work with young kids, there was a bit too much CBeebies for my liking so now I’m weaning them off (a bit cold turkey!). I’ve gone three days and I’m going barmy.

During lockdown they were watching maybe 1.5 hours a day in the afternoon.

There isn’t much on play-wise out in the world atm (playground has been done to death), and on the days DS doesn’t have nursery, I’m struggling by about 2pm.

I know lots of parents don’t do telly at all. Share your wisdom! What do you do to keep them entertained and stop yourself from going mad?! Normally we would play with friends or go out and we didn’t do telly too much (pre-lockdown), but we can’t do that anymore. And DS absolutely cannot play independently. I have to play with him / read to him / entertain him every single second of the day from 6am-7:30pm.

I’m trying to find more nursery for DS, within my budget (currently goes twice a week - short days 9-3, when I work) Because I think we’re both so bored! Can’t even go swimming etc.

I'm not a shining example but my kids watch a lot more than 1.5 hours a day on non-nursery or school days and I'm a bit 'meh' about whether it's a big problem. They have learned some sign language from mr tumble and some letters and numbers from alpha/number blocks etc, so it's not all completely mindless. I figure as long as they are at school/nursery and playing most of the time, some tv is fine.

I won't allow peppa pig though!

How old are your kids? My boys are three and five and play with Lego/jigsaws etc or in the garden quite happily together and that keeps them occupied. My youngest can't entertain himself but his brother can so it's not all down to me. The oldest likes drawing and jigsaws and will happily do those himself.

I also have a baby and she entertains the boys too, they crawl round after her and stuff!

To be honest my approach is to ignore them a bit (in a nice way, not neglect but sort of 'off you go and play!') and let them sort themselves out. They need to figure out that I am not a children's entertainer and they need to occupy themselves sometimes.

Overall though, tv is not the enemy- just make sure they are programmed you are happy with.

I do t think 1.5 hrs is loads personally. I think some studies were done in the US recently with the findings that WHAT children watch is far more important than worrying about how much they watch. So publicly funded services which have educational content - CBeebies etc - good. Crappy stuff with too much noise and lights and no education - bad. That was the idea. And it makes sense, numberblocks and educational stuff like Go Jetters has value.

Also bear in mind you need a break too! After childcare/school mine can watch TV on Mon, Wed and Fri. They’re fine with that. I never put on the TV in the morning as I found it caused more upset - whinging and demands to watch it earlier and earlier. So it’s an afternoon thing for us once we’ve done playing and been outdoors and so on.

They’re preschool (older is almost 4, younger a baby) and there have been days when the tv has been on for longer than 1.5 hours - but that was the average. DH and I took it in turns to entertain the older in lockdown because he howls and screams when the tv is turned off (younger is so little they don’t care, but I do feel bad about them staring at the tv) , which makes it not feel quite worth it! But we stick to CBeebies as all the programmes seem quite benign.

At the moment, DS is addicted and asks for it constantly when we’re indoors - hence the cold turkey.

I might try ignoring him and getting on with jobs a bit more!

He is very active and - like I said - doesn’t play on his own, so he doesn’t even go into the garden to play unless there’s someone there with him.

I just don't turn it on? At that age: lots of reading to DS, colouring, getting him to "help" make a cake or even dinner.

You've picked the toughest time of year to stop though: just as an hour in the garden becomes harder. Although on days like this when DS was 2 I used to send him out with all his rainwear and wellies on to splash whilst I sat on a chair at the back door with a brew (shoes on for when I had to nip out and grab him)

I feel pretty guilty about it, Gulpingcoffee as I’ve read studies about how it isn’t great also. Really trying to wean off and leave it for an occasional movie treat or when I really, really need to get something done!

I can't get over excited about too much tv. Mine will play duplo/trains/cars/kitchen for ages, but they love the tv too. I live quite near a few museums so I've started booking the very early slot once a week. Gets us out of the house and away from the tv. Toddler enjoys running about on their reins. Feels a bit safer covid wise, and its good for my mental health to get out. When older DC were this age we'd hang out with other parents/kids in play cafes but that's not an option anymore. I miss it

I don't restrict TV/Kindle, she's 4, i'm comfortable with her usage, she generally watches TV for maybe 45 mins before wandering off for something else to do.
She can watch Octonauts, Go Jetters, Number blocks, Hey Duggee and Alphablocks, with the odd episode of Peter Rabbit. If you have Disney plus Micky Mouse clubhouse is ok too as it gets them thinking.
During lockdown i generally left out colouring books and pencils, blocks, jigsaws, leapstart book plus other bits and pieces so that were easily accessible and always in her sight

Yeah I really miss hanging out with other mums and kids it used to save my sanity and the kids loved it too!

I'm with @MinesAPintOfTea, it just doesn't go on. They play with toys/books, or hang out with me while i do bits.

That’s a good idea to have activities out on the table for your daughter to find, time. I don’t really do that. I am going to try it and a rotation of stuff!

Studies showing TV is bad for kids were done in the US where TV = mindless cartoons.

As long as you stick with cbeebies you can be sure they're learning loads, plus there's no ads.

I really wouldn't worry about it

Our tv is in our open plan living room / kitchen where we also tend to play and hang out, and I think if it were a bit more out of sight, DS wouldn’t fixate on it so much! (After his lockdown overload!)

Just wondering how old DS is?

Similar situation here in a way, but to be honest I don't really care all that much. TV serves a purpose - I've got to get stuff done around the house, and I also need to tune the kids out a few hours a day for my own sanity.

My strategy for not being in front of the TV all day is not to go home after the school run. Stay out, keep up the momentum. We go grocery shopping, garden centre, drive miles to try new playgrounds or playgrounds we haven't visited for a while, visit the shopping centre, go to Aldi and Lidl to look at their special offers, sometimes we drop by on unsuspecting neighbours, go to town square let them chase pigeons and other random outings.

The TV goes on after lunch, for a couple of hours until school pick up, but sometimes DC naps so there is no need.

The main driver for staying out of the house is so that DC and I spend quality time, rather than to avoid TV. Otherwise we just do CBebbies and I'm on my phone all day and no one feels great.

That's my other trick: we don't have a conventional TV that looks blank if not on. We have a pull-down projector screen and a projector on a shelf on the wall opposite. Out of sight, out of mind...

mypet he’ll be four soon (younger is a baby so I feel pretty bad about that!). That’s such a lovely idea about going out after school pickup and staying out!

mines a projector is a genius idea! Out of sight out of mind!

Thanks for this thread. So is CBeebies best? My DC just turned 2. Sadly she knows all the Peppa episodes 🙈 but she's learned loads from it and now has a lot of the PP paraphernalia 🤷🏻‍♀️

I do loads of other stuff with her, exercise in the morning by going out - we also paint, draw, read, build blocks, playdoh, soft toys, puzzles etc and my mum got her an amazon fire but I also feel guilty about her using that (she mainly does the puzzles on it or some weird vet game).

I really wouldnt worry about it OP. People will tell you TV rots their brain bla bla bla but like PP have said, it can be educational if it's not just silly cartoons.

My DD doesnt watch that much TV. Only because she is a live wire who cant sit still, but she has picked up on lots of new words (some sign language) from that god awful clown on TV so I cant say it's all bad. Most of the time I have her with me doing what I'm doing but kid friendly. Cooking dinner i give her pots and pans to help, sit her on the side to help me wash up, a cloth with some water to "help" me clean. Sticker books keep her occupied too. Mostly she likes running round in circles trying to injure herself, that's her fav pass time.

Mine are all fine now (much older, not very bothered for years) but with the first one there was an issue after school.

We put it in the loft.

We also have arts and craft box full of anything and everything and I get that out in the morning with a pot of PVA glue and make pictures etc. We collect leaves aswell to do prints at home, a good hour and half walk collecting, then an hour painting takes a nice chunk of the afternoon.

Follow people like @play.hooray and @mothercould on insta as they both give heaps of ideas of things to do....they are a godsend!

My eldest is a bit older but having progressed to CBBC I’ll admit I like watching some of the shows with him! They’re generally well made, strong sense of morality in the storylines and reflect his demographic. I don’t set a time limit as such as long as homework is done and bedroom not resembling a pit of doom. He’ll be just fine.

We don't have a TV set. DC can pick something to watch on laptop (Netflix, iplayer, Disney Plus or a DVD) after tea for 30 mins on a school night. On Saturdays, we have a movie night and all watch a film together. This was same throughout lockdown but they were used to it as this has been system for years.

We don’t do tv in our house, well my husband does though.

I can not stand the tv on in the background so if no one is watching it I turn it off instantly.

I don’t watch tv and my kids are at school and not allowed tv until gone 6.

My kids are school age though so it’s a different situation to yours.

Nothing wrong with watching tv and for how long if that’s what your family does. I constantly watched tv as a kid, loved it, now I never watch it other than the news occasionally.

This battle isn’t worth fighting until your kids are older, unless you have time to fight the battle with entertaining them as they are quite young.

Just don't have it on. We don't have absolutely zero TV and screens but had zero before school age and irregular now, i.e. maybe a film on a free day (weekend, half term) which would be a good 1.5 - 2 hours, but nothing most days.

DC have a choice to either tag along with whatever I'm doing (so help make supper or whatever) or play alone. Obviously I'll make time every day to play with them, but not all day long. DD was an only child for many years and just learned to entertain herself.

Obviously it's much harder when everything's closed as I did tend to go out most days before school age. Is there anything apart from playgrounds open near you? Libraries? Different parks (not just the playground bit) to feed the ducks, play pooh sticks, collect conkers? Anywhere to look at cows, horses, interesting shop windows? Just to vary the daily exercise route! Museums and exhibitions? Country parks with a children's trail? Taking a picnic to a local point of interest?