If you don’t let your kids watch telly - please tell me HOW YOU DO IT!

[Mhschoolq]

After lockdown and trying to work with young kids, there was a bit too much CBeebies for my liking so now I’m weaning them off (a bit cold turkey!). I’ve gone three days and I’m going barmy.

During lockdown they were watching maybe 1.5 hours a day in the afternoon.

There isn’t much on play-wise out in the world atm (playground has been done to death), and on the days DS doesn’t have nursery, I’m struggling by about 2pm.

I know lots of parents don’t do telly at all. Share your wisdom! What do you do to keep them entertained and stop yourself from going mad?! Normally we would play with friends or go out and we didn’t do telly too much (pre-lockdown), but we can’t do that anymore. And DS absolutely cannot play independently. I have to play with him / read to him / entertain him every single second of the day from 6am-7:30pm.

What’s wrong with Peppa Pig?!

Go out, a trip to the park, feed the ducks, Sainsbury’s, then do a craft activity, independent play and let them help with housework. I don’t think 1.5 hours is overly excessive as long as you’re doing other thing too.

I think, like almost everything, it is balance.

TV can be really interesting and stimulating and my children have learned and been excited by a lot of great television. But, left on all the time it becomes a mind-less time filler.

It sounds like you are doing a great job already, I wouldn't throw the baby out with the bath water.

I really feel your struggle. My son is just 2, and I can literally have done play dough, duplo, tidy the kitchen, pretend cooking, colouring, bubbles etc etc and the clock is telling me it’s only 9am. TV is literally the only effective time killer, everything else is abandoned after three minutes!

The major problem with TV is what they're not doing when they're watching it, i.e. physical activity, interacting with humans, playing. So a little bit is ok, but hours (IMO) is not. We do allow telly, but only in 2 slots of an hour. So on Wednesday and Sunday they know it is a TV day and they have stopped asking for it in between. When they did ask, we would remind them that it's not a TV day. I find having designated days also helps with my willpower in saying no. You are at a difficult stage in that your eldest is still quite young, but he will lose the habit quickly if you stick to it. This is an opportunity to teach him to play independently and if he really can't, to get him to help you do stuff. Make sure you stop regularly and offer to do something with him, e.g. 30 minutes cooking dinner, 10 minutes reading a story. It is more work! But worth it IMO - my kids just play or read on the days that aren't TV days.

Could you get rid of the TV for a while? If not, instead of total cold turkey could you record a specific programme and allow one episode a day at a ‘good’ moment? I think some TV is fine, your sanity is important.

I think the advantage of getting rid of it is they do benefit from going through the boredom wall, on their own. Otherwise you end up being like a childminder, and I think home shouldn't be like that.

I am probably a bit indoctrinated though as my own parents got rid of the telly!

TV was a lifesaver when DS was 2 and I was pregnant with SPD over a long, hard winter. Lots of CBeebies, Thomas and Fireman Sam.

When I felt human again when DS2 was 3m and we'd got past the chicken pox month, I began putting a timer on the TV and making sure I was out of the room when it clicked off... it turns out that his intense tantrums and intense concentration for tgings like TV are connected with his autism.

TV and tech still need managing for the reason above. Timers and apps help to make it less personal and my DCs accept that their time is capped and may have conditions attached.

TV in itself is not terrible. Too long at any single activity is not balanced. DS1 has learned so much first through thngs likeHo Jetters and Ctonauts and now documentaries (loves Smithsonian Channel documentaries about the Pacufic War) especally as with strong dyslexia, he finds TV far more accessible than books.

We didn't have a television at all when the children were small, so they never got used to watching it in the first place.
Both could play independently from a young age, neither are big on playing outside tbh.

We didn’t have TV when DD was a baby/toddler. She just used to amuse herself with toys and books - however, she didn’t know any different. She doesn’t watch much TV nowadays, although does watch stuff on YouTube and likes it on as background noise when she’s playing.

This is what I read OP, it’s quite interesting: www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.ft.com/content/0eee3338-7928-11ea-9840-1b8019d9a987

I was really strict about tv with my 2 oldest and as a consequence they became obsessed about when they could watch again . By the time I had my third it had all slid abit and the tv was on more ,he was much less interested and ignored it a lot. Now as young adults they all are busy and out and about, not particularly bothered about tv. My nieces and nephews had tv on alot and are high achieving and busy people. Do what works for you I guess and do a range of activities everyone enjoys and is interested in as well as watching tv .

We are almost no screen family. It is only used here for live sport.
What did I do instead? A mixture of planned stuff (IG has lots of good ideas for fun stuff l- check out the fiveminutemum as well) and letting them get bored. I am not there to entertain my children all day. I am and was happy to listen to a little whining to get them used to independent play. The kids are now nearly 9 and 4 and they play together and alone pretty well. I’ll play for a bit and then withdraw, or I’ll set something up and let them find it.

Unless you’ve missed a digit I wouldn’t worry about 1.5 hours.

I've just started cutting TV down, my 2.5 year old watched so much in lockdown. We watch it while eating breakfast and chilling in the morning, maybe an hour to 1.5 hours, then it's off and that's it. We do housework, I try and sit and play with her for an hour, we are learning independent play 🙈 then it's lunchtime, then crafts or a walk, or park or see friends and family. It is so hard just now with no playgroups or anything. TV usually goes on at half 4, so I can cook tea then we all watch something educational after bath time to wind down before bedtime.

TV and technology is a big part of our kids lives now, as long as then can play, and you are involved in their learning too, a bit of TV is fine. As others have said, chose.more educational things like cbeebies and Mickey mouse clubhouse. My daughter has learned to play doctors from watching Doc McStuffins!!

We don't own one, so we just muddle through! DC are involved in helping with household jobs a lot if they're not interested in playing.