What the hell do I have to do to lose weight? Huh? HUH???

[LunaNorth]

I’ve stopped drinking - 38 days AF so far, with no plans to restart.

I’ve completed C25K, three weeks ago, and have kept up running, three times a week since.

I go open water swimming once or twice a week.

I do an hour-long yoga class every week.

I have three dogs that get walked every day.

I have a Fitbit, and always make sure I do my 10,000 steps and always do more active minutes than the target.

I’m also coeliac, which curtails my options when it comes to eating out and takeaways. Lockdown put a stop to meals out, too.

All this effort, and I haven’t lost an ounce! I don’t have scales, granted, but my waist has INCREASED by an inch and my clothes feel exactly the same tight.

Wtf? I’m so fed up. Yes, I do eat a lot, always have, but it’s mostly good stuff, and with the not drinking, no gluten, tons of exercise, I had hoped I’d be allowed the odd treat. Clearly not.

Is this it, then? Does middle age mean living on lettuce and a dream if I don’t want to resemble a pit pony?

And please don’t take away my carbs. I thrive on them. I’ve tried low-carb and it gives me a headache.

I want to avoid all diets if possible. I’ve done SW and WW in the past, as well as 16:8. I just can’t sustain it.

Is anyone else in a similar position? What do I have to do?!

Calories are just fuel - if you want to lose weight you need to create a deficit. That might be through low carb, intermittent fasting, loads of exercise or just eating smaller portions - you just need to find what works for you.

It definitely gets harder after 40. I track my calories on weightlossresources (like Mfp, but I prefer it) and link to calories burned on my Fitbit. It's hard work though. I do a few months of logging when I put on a few pounds. I'm currently trying to lose the last two pounds gained in the early weeks of lockdown when my activity levels dropped significantly but my food intake didn't. Most of it has gone but the last couple of pounds are being very stubborn.

@LunaNorth

I’ve stopped drinking - 38 days AF so far, with no plans to restart.

I’ve completed C25K, three weeks ago, and have kept up running, three times a week since.

I go open water swimming once or twice a week.

I do an hour-long yoga class every week.

I have three dogs that get walked every day.

I have a Fitbit, and always make sure I do my 10,000 steps and always do more active minutes than the target.

I’m also coeliac, which curtails my options when it comes to eating out and takeaways. Lockdown put a stop to meals out, too.

All this effort, and I haven’t lost an ounce! I don’t have scales, granted, but my waist has INCREASED by an inch and my clothes feel exactly the same tight.

Wtf? I’m so fed up. Yes, I do eat a lot, always have, but it’s mostly good stuff, and with the not drinking, no gluten, tons of exercise, I had hoped I’d be allowed the odd treat. Clearly not.

Is this it, then? Does middle age mean living on lettuce and a dream if I don’t want to resemble a pit pony?

And please don’t take away my carbs. I thrive on them. I’ve tried low-carb and it gives me a headache.

I want to avoid all diets if possible. I’ve done SW and WW in the past, as well as 16:8. I just can’t sustain it.

Is anyone else in a similar position? What do I have to do?!

If you message me, I'd be happy to work out your deficit for fat loss and you can try it for a couple of weeks ☺️

@Wallywobbles

Read or listen on audible to the Obesity Code. Fascinating. And then you will know why. Will it leave me bereft of hope?

No. Rather the opposite. More like an aha.

I listened to Healthy as Fuck before hand. She looks at the emotional side a bit more. I'm listening to the books to help me be motivated.

Basically I'm 50 in Jan and I'm over 100kgs. In my late 20s I was 55 kg. And I've yo-yoed ever since.

I've lost 5 kings since the beginning of September. I seem to have fallen into 16/8 just by not eating my first meal of the day before I'm actually hungry.

Sadly I think breakfast maybe gone forever.

But I'm a very good (modest too) cook. With a mass of cookbooks. And we are eating well. The problem in part is 4 kids.

This lunch on a regular basis. Thai peanut coleslaw.

www.mastercook.com/app/Recipe/WebRecipeDetails?recipeId=17649580

I just figured out the calories in my usual breakfast.

Erm...it’s all becoming a bit clearer

@LunaNorth

Fasting makes me so grumpy that DH banned me after one day

You fast at night! It's so much easier.

That peanut salad looks gorgeous. I love peanut anything particularly chocolate peanuts

Smaller plates and cooking smaller portions works well for me.

Here is my experience.

I have always been a total gym bunny but recently have felt a bit apprehensive about exercising. It makes me quite tired for the rest of the day and I need to eat because otherwise I wouldn't be able to function.

Last month we got a dog and I find myself on the move all the time. With gentle exercise such as long walks I find that I am not as hungry, I am energetic instead of lethargic and much more able to stick to healthy eating. I do eat carbs but in moderation and only good ones. I don't drink which helps. I bought new trousers in July which were very tight (but hey, they were expensive and on sale!) and was astonished to discover that they are now comfortably loose.

OP you do mention that you have dogs so maybe cut the other sports a bit? Maybe it will help you eat less and eat better. I am 41, by the way.

Smaller portions, definitely. The daft thing is, I hate that over-full feeling, but inflict it on myself anyway.

I’m an emotional eater too, do that needs sorting.

I imagine I have a fair bit of work to do.

*so

When I need to lose some weight I use MFP and log every single calorie. Rather than working out how many calories you think you need based on your exercise etc just pick a sensible amount and then wait and see if you lose weight. If you don’t Lose weight then reduce the calories.

I usually start at 1500 calories and then end up reducing it to about 1350-1400. I lose weight slowly and surely. I usually aim for a pound or so a week. Obviously the calories that you need will be different than what I need. I wouldn’t lose any weight at 1800 calories a day. I exercise daily but not as much as you do.

I also find it helpful to start dieting by having an introductory getting-ready-to-diet stage. I cut down on all the crap and eat less for a few days before I start dieting properly. I think it helps me get in the zone.

@MandalaYogaTapestry (lovely name, by the way).

What you’re saying makes sense, but the running and swimming are really important for me mentally. It sounds daft, but a run makes me feel much calmer and more capable. I don’t think I want to give it up.

I walk the dogs for miles on my rest days though!

Thank you Luna 🙂🙂

Believe me I get it, I am a runner too. I am known as one of the strongest women on my gym (not boasting, it's true). I love the mental health benefit of sport but I also need it to do the work of helping me stay in shape. So if I put in all that time and effort and then develop a round tummy... not good and feels very unfair!

So I have to agree with others, it's all about what we eat. Maybe it is indeed due to being older. Are you eating sugar? Cut that, bad carbs (white flour, pasta, chips) and unhealthy snacks (crisps, protein bars and other pre-packed stuff). The obvious culprits really.

With the rest of the food - just be sensible. Diet Coke is 0 calories but you know it's bad for you - cut. Ketchup, mayo (sugar, fat) - cut. Remove fat from bacon. Skip butter. Milk instead of cream in your coffee. Fruit for desert instead of Muller Light. Etc, etc.

Truth is, I think with all the information around us, we all do know what's good for us. So the trick is try to stick to it rather than look for ways to cut corners. Anyway, that's what works for me.

That all makes sense, @MandalaYogaTapestry.

I guess I know what I have to do, really. Exercise was never going to be enough on its own.

Posted too soon.

I do have an occasional pudding or chilli peanuts or red wine. Life is for living! But it's occasional.

I’m 65. Started lockdown at 16st 8lbs. Currently 13st 11lbs and losing.

No magic formula, I use Nutracheck plus a Fitbit. Eat 1400 calories a day and walk 5 or 6 miles a day. It’s much harder to lose when you’re 60+ but I’ve found that just plugging away at it works.

I eat mostly healthily but some days I eat 1400 calories of rubbish. If I go much below 1400 I end up getting over hungry and have a mini binge but straight back on it the next day.

You didn't mention eating.

Exercise, especially those gentle walks and swims, will only burn 200-300 cal. You could eat that with a couple of biscuits.

Burning 1800 calories a day is fine, but not if you eat 3000.

You need to eat less, and eat more low-calorie things - vegetables, etc. Eating 1800 and doing 2000's worth of exercise means a nice, slow weight loss. Eat 1500 and do 2000 will be a bit faster but need better tracking, because you can easily have a few extra chips, eat 2200 and lose the benefit.

Exercise is beneficial for many reasons but in terms of weight loss, you can't outrun your fork.

It's the eating. You have to reduce the quantity. It might be good food, but overeating is overeating. I tried to exercise away my excess baby weight and fuck all happened. Had a series of dental procedures that reduced my enjoyment in food and lost a few pounds in a fortnight. I saw the light. I no longer snack at all, have reduced my portion sizes and have lost over a stone in about 8 to 10 weeks.

@Aurorie11 I'm 5'7 and 222lb. I have a bit of fat but also very muscular. Size 14.

Truth is, I think with all the information around us, we all do know what's good for us

I disagree, sort of. There is so much “information” often contradictory, that it can be difficult to process it all.

Don’t eat carbs. Don’t eat fat. Gluten. Fasting, breakfast is the most important meal of the day, you aren't eating enough to lose weight, starvation mode, eat 5 meals a day, you need to fuel your metabolism, insulin is bad, ketosis, avoid sugar...

Most of it is based on a very weak grasp of the metabolic science. It sounds good on the surface, and people think aha! That’s what i need to do- cut carbs so I don’t produce insulin, then I won’t store fat! Easy!. Nope. Our bodies have millions of different pathways and it’s never that simple.

Bottom line is everyone is different. Dieting is as much psychological as physical, and it’s about finding a way to reduce the amount you eat that’s sustainable.

Cutting carbs, fasting, low fat etc aren’t any sort of magic bullet. They work by helping you eat less. Choose the one that you find easiest to do.

Same with exercise. I am a muscular build and weights and vigorous exercise increases muscle mass and helps burn calories. Walking dogs or running makes no difference. For someone with a different body type the opposite might be true.

It’s difficult to wade through all the “expert” advice sometimes.

It’s the food love! On the upside you are so healthy in other areas that if you reduce calories it should come off reasonabley quick.

I get that you don’t want to do slimming world as a whole - but could you incorporate some of the principles? Such as using fry light, fat free products etc? It would help?

Exercise, especially those gentle walks and swims, will only burn 200-300 cal. You could eat that with a couple of biscuits.

An hour's walk burns 300 to 400 calories. Biscuits is a bad example. They are a, not particularly nutritious, high calorie food. 300 to 400 calories can be a filling meal. I can have 2 fried eggs, small bit of ham, half a slice of toast and cup of tea for that (frequent breakfast) or green salad with with chicken and mayonnaise (frequent lunch) for that.

I do occasionally have a nice biscuit. The limit for me on a normal day, though is 50 to 60 calories, twice a day, when I have my coffee. So I might have a good quality piece of chocolate, chocolate truffle or a biscuit. If the biscuit is the type that is 100 calories I break it in half!

I don't have issues with hunger, eating like this. If I eat too many carbs I do get hungry. But I am a bit of a foodie so a taste of good quality stuff suits me down to the ground. I am also a creature of habit. Chocolate / small dessert such as apple crumble with clotted cream (in a ramekin) with my coffee.

There are some really helpful messages here, thank you all. I’m glad I started this thread.

@bluebluezoo, I agree with what you say about conflicting evidence being confusing. What I would add, though, is that in my case, all the conflicting advice constitutes a massive raft of excuses that I can pick and choose from at any given point in a day.

So my greedy monkey brain can eat a 500cal breakfast, going ‘most important meal of the day!’, then a load of cheese and biscuits for lunch (‘fat is important!’) and a ton of pasta for tea (‘slimming world allows all the carbs!’).

Hence, fat.

I think I’ve finally come to the conclusion that the same cognitive dissonance that allowed me to drink too much is what is allowing me to eat too much.

Time to sort my head out.

Because I don't eat a lot of dessert or biscuits I can justify getting higher quality stuff and have got a taste for it. So a lot of the cheap biscuits don't really tempt me, I actively don't like them anymore. I was given a small packet in A & E once (I had a high temperature once when undergoing cancer treatment) and I couldn't stomach more than a bite. Far too sweet! They were ginger biscuits that I liked years ago with my tea.