What's your favourite non-swearword?

[shreddednips]

DH and I are giving up swearing as toddler DS is getting quite chatty. We try not to swear in front of him but need to redouble our efforts. This got me thinking- what are the most satisfying non-swear alternatives?

My personal favourite is 'Schostakovich!' instead of shit. I also enjoy 'Jeepers!'

I say

Cheese and Rice!
Goodness!
Back the truck up
Drat
Crumbs
Fiddlesticks

And all manner of other nonsense. But I've got 2 and 4 year olds who repeat everything

Despite our careful non swearing, DH accidentally muttered 'little fucker' under his breath the other day when when 2 year old ran and deliberately sat down in a giant (6inch deep) puddle, right in the middle so he needed to wade in and get her. 4 year old instantly repeats, calling sibling a little fucker. Oops.

Luckily DH wisely ignored it and 4 year old has not repeated it thank goodness!

Bumfluff
Fudge
Fudgesicles
Rhubarb.
Knickers
Shizzle
Shizzle sticks
Fluffing nora

Rapscallions

Lawks

My word at work when something happens is usually "for ducks sake" especially in earshot of higher management

'What the baaaats' - stolen from my DD(5) favourite book.

Balls. And if it's really bad, Fiddling balls

Crumbs. As in, oh crumbs

@IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere

My DF never ever used anything you could identify as a swear word but for some reason when things were at their very worst - hitting his thumb with a hammer type situation - he would shout: District Nurse!

My kids would refer to each other as "You son of a motherless goat!"

District nurse just made me laugh out loud 🤣🤣 did you ever ask him why?

So many amazing options on here, I'm going to start testing some of them out and see which ones give me the most satisfaction. I swear like a sailor but DS has started parroting everything I say so it's going to be a whole load of district nurses and cloachas from here on in. Might stretch to a sod if I'm REALLY cross.

I had an American friend at uni who used to say 'what in tarnation????' instead of what the fuck which I think is delightful.

Also remembered my cousin shouting 'CURSES!' in genuine rage whenever he got cross at around the age of six, in the style of a pantomime villain.

For the love of God
Good Grief
Flaming Nora
What the Unholy Haddock

Bloomin’ is a favourite round here. Only realised how often I used it when DS (then aged 3) announced, “The garden is full of bloomin’ rabbits Mummy.” Glad I’d been careful to curb my construction industry language and also glad he was talking about the furry kind.

I'm most likely to make a random stupid noise to instead of swearing - such as blowing a raspberry at the car which cuts you up.
I also tend to use a relevant word such as "Bang!" "Smash" or "Ouch!" if I hurt myself or drop something. It's just as effective to release the stress if said with enough volume/emotion/emphasis/sarcasm.

By heck, crumbs, Christ on a bike, and shut the front door.

I had a list of great alternatives but when the time comes it's always sugar and fudge. I drop something, start to swear (mouth is making the sh shape) but catch myself quickly enough to make it sugar not shit.