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Original poster

I’m in pain because I did something stupid!... Tell me your stories of stupidity!

50 replies

Dorobie · 11/09/2020 23:03

Go on! Make me feel better 😫

I’m a teacher, I got to school at 7 this morning, one of very few in the building at that time.

I was in my classroom... at far end away from anyone else in the building. Nowhere near the staffroom etc.

I stupidly stood on a table to switch the projector on. The table is triangular shaped with the legs and it instantly toppled over, I fell flat right on top of it and then spent a good 15 mins in a ball on the floor using ‘birthing technique’ breathing to calm me down!!

It fucking hurt! My leg and back landed on the side of the toppled table, I have a massive bruise appearing on my thigh and at the time I thought I’d broken a rib!!

Worse thing though was the fact that no one was around to find me if it had have been worse!

Luckily I’m fine, got up and carried on with my day and did ‘t tell anyone 🙈

OP posts:
dudsville · 11/09/2020 23:06

OOOOOWWWWWWW, that sounds painful! I'll have a think for my story and come back with it but for now you have my full sympathy!

Original poster
Dorobie · 11/09/2020 23:12

Thanks!!

I’ve been hiding it from my DH as I don’t want to tell him out of embarrassment 😬

OP posts:
2tired2bewitty · 11/09/2020 23:13

Ooh, ouch, poor you. Hope it feels less sore soon.

Once at university one of my housemates, who was a bit of a martial arts nut, had got hold of a set of nunchucks so we all had a go at our best Bruce Lee impersonations and I managed to smack them into the back of my head Blush

weegiemum · 11/09/2020 23:14

That sounds painful.

I had spent a morning sorting through my yarn stash when I was sitting on the sofa with yarn all over the floor I had an idea I wanted to share with dh (at work). I jumped up to grab the phone off the bookshelf, got tangled in some really nasty acrylic stuff and toppled over, breaking and dislocating my ankle in the process. It was an open fracture, and the yarn had cut right through to the bone "like cheese wire!" The doctor said.

Luckily I had grabbed the phone so could call 999 (I was at home alone). I've never been so grateful to see anyone as the ambulance man with his gas & air!! They also gave me morphine, my foot was facing the wrong way!

A lovely neighbour saw the ambulance and agreed to take in the kids when they got back from school. As I was being sorted for the ambulance I got dh (who is a dr) in the phone so he met us in A&E and saw me before the 3 hr surgery!

I was in hospital for 10 days and in plaster for 10 weeks!!!

TheNavigator · 11/09/2020 23:15

I went to the toilet last night, stubbed my toe on the bed leg, splitting a toe nail. So sore and I was so brave quietly lying in pain not disturbing DH. I told him this morning how brave I'd been and he was not suitably impressed.

user1471522343 · 11/09/2020 23:16

When I was about 12, pretending I was 14ish and hanging out where the cool kids hung out at the park (basically a play park for kids but there was nowhere else to go) the boy id’d fancied for ages - from afar - turned up looking gorgeous. I did my best to be nonchalant, played casually with the chains on the swings, then tripped, fell on to the swing and winded myself. Did my best to stand back up and be nonchalant again but not easy and fooled no one. Still blush to this day when I think of it.

DubiousGoals · 11/09/2020 23:18

I plugged the laminator in, warned everyone else in the office not to trip over the cable ... then promptly tripped over the cable myself.

MrsJackRackham · 11/09/2020 23:21

I was using a stick blender and a bit of veg got stuck. For some inexplicable reason I turned it on at the same time as my finger was rooting around the blade Confused
I clutched my poor finger in fear for a good few minutes, too scared to look in case it was now a couple of centimetres shorter than it used to be. 'Luckily' I just shredded fuck out of it.

TimeToGetMeBack · 11/09/2020 23:22

Leg- wet metal stairs.
Arms- office chair with wheels

WeAllHaveWings · 11/09/2020 23:29

Looking point blank down a nerf gun barrell while trying the trigger to dislodge a stuck bullet. Optician could even see the scratches from the velcro end on my eyeball.

When much younger, A&E trip with burns on inner thighs. Not a good place to hold a hot curling wand while tying hair up. Bit nippy, couldn't wear trousers for a couple of weeks.

OldAndWornOut · 11/09/2020 23:32

I decided to do a backwards roly poly whilst enjoying a kind of "session" with the ex.

I lurched as I was almost over, and fell down arse up, wedged between the bed and chest of drawers.

I had hit one foot on every handle of the drawers, and had a big curl of skin (like a quaver) at base of each (black and blue) toe.

pumpkinpie01 · 11/09/2020 23:33

When I was a student , many years ago , my kettle was on my window ledge bed and was in front of window. Water was boiling and I decided to look for something down by the bed , I leaned over caught the lead and ended up with hot water all over my right ear . The nurse dressed my ear in a big square shaped bandage , god I looked stupid .

moanyhole · 11/09/2020 23:39

There was a hole in our ceiling at one point leading from an upstairs bedroom to the sitting room. We were in the sitting room and as I was about to go upstairs dh said to me dont forget the hole. I got all offended that he would think I would be that stupid. And yes up I went, forgot the hole and landed into the sitting room next to DH in his armchair. Bruised and battered and to his credit he didnt say I told you so!

IdblowJonSnow · 11/09/2020 23:39

When I was in Australia my friend braked his car when a dog jumped into our path. Unbeknownst to me, his didgeridoo which was in the back of the car slammed into the back of my head. It really fucking hurt and I dont doubt if we'd been going much faster it would have killed me.
All I could picture in my mind for ages was the word 'didgeridon't' on my gravestone. Sad

HowFastIsTooFast · 11/09/2020 23:40

Fractured my skull going over a ramp on rollerblades while attached by rope to the back of someone's bike (I was about 9 though).

In my old flat I regularly used to open the top kitchen cupboard, bend down for the fridge and then stand up straight into the corner of the cupboard door. Surprised I haven't got a permanent dint. Thankfully new kitchen is designed more sensibly and it would be near impossible for me to do the same trick.

largeprintagathachristie · 11/09/2020 23:45

In terms of standing on things you shouldn’t, I stood on a FOLDING chair (at the back of the room at a massive work event) and yep, the chair folded. Somehow I shot through the gap during the fall and then it folded up on me. It’s still talked about fondly years later by those who were around to witness it. Only my pride was hurt, though. Blush

OldAndWornOut · 11/09/2020 23:54
Grin I love these.
ComeBackLaterPlease · 11/09/2020 23:55

OP I did almost exactly the same thing, way way back in my teaching days.

After school hours, in my distant classroom with no eye level windows, where no one would be passing till the next day.

Climbed into a filing cabinet to do a wall display, and fell off, bouncing off a table and chair on the way down.

How I didn’t break my leg I’m not sure. The bruising was incredible.

Never told a soul.

Gingerkittykat · 12/09/2020 00:00

God knows why I decided to stick my hand into a pan of boiling pasta to pick a bit out to see if it was cooked.

As a kid got fed up sledging down the hill with the other kids so decided to sledge down the bit with a wall about 10m away from the bottom of the hill.

Again as a kid, I decided to sledge down the stairs and the sledge went through the wall at the bottom.

I'm not normally that stupid!

titnomatani · 12/09/2020 00:00

I really shouldn't say this but I'm loving this thread! The shredded af finger made me wince and chuckle 🙈

shazshaz · 12/09/2020 00:04

I lit a t-light and left it burning on top of a tv - stupid I know. Then I fell asleep and woke to find it had melted a big hole in the tv with loads of smoke & small flames inside the tv. In my panic I reached in and grabbed the flaming t-light before throwing water over the whole tv. I only wound up with blistered fingers but it hurt like hell.

Funatish · 12/09/2020 00:05

Aw mate, too many to mention... But most notable are:

  • breaking wrist leaving the bin out
  • breaking nose due to a dance floor conversation with my sister
  • breaking rib after laughing too hard and then falling
  • falling off my doorstep in very high heels
  • concussion after sliding on wet leaves

I am very clumsy

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 12/09/2020 00:07

I had unprotected sex once in the last 7 years and I'm now 5 months pregnant. I'll be paying for that one for the rest of my life 😂

KindergardenCentre · 12/09/2020 00:21

Simole sinus infection = dd.

Original poster
Dorobie · 12/09/2020 06:40

@weegiemum

That sounds painful.

I had spent a morning sorting through my yarn stash when I was sitting on the sofa with yarn all over the floor I had an idea I wanted to share with dh (at work). I jumped up to grab the phone off the bookshelf, got tangled in some really nasty acrylic stuff and toppled over, breaking and dislocating my ankle in the process. It was an open fracture, and the yarn had cut right through to the bone "like cheese wire!" The doctor said.

Luckily I had grabbed the phone so could call 999 (I was at home alone). I've never been so grateful to see anyone as the ambulance man with his gas & air!! They also gave me morphine, my foot was facing the wrong way!

A lovely neighbour saw the ambulance and agreed to take in the kids when they got back from school. As I was being sorted for the ambulance I got dh (who is a dr) in the phone so he met us in A&E and saw me before the 3 hr surgery!

I was in hospital for 10 days and in plaster for 10 weeks!!!

😯 This is horrific! What a total freak accident! Flowers
OP posts: