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Original poster

Best revenge stories

98 replies

JacktomyDaniel · 11/09/2020 21:22

I know, I know. The best revenge is to move on and better yourself but after sharing joke (ish) revenge options with a friend tonight, I'd love to hear yours!
Entertain me. I'm bored 😂

OP posts:
BuggerBognor · 15/09/2020 17:59

This reply has been withdrawn

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Lollypop701 · 15/09/2020 18:35

A friend gave her cheating now ex husband a full body massage with veet... he had a shower after 15/20 minutes due to the smell. apparently he looked like a mangy dog he was. hair fell out more in one place than another etc. She had his stuff packed at the front door ready to go

Bigyellowsunshine · 15/09/2020 20:37

@BuggerBognor Oooooooh now that’s interesting. I’m off to google....

Inappropriatefemale · 15/09/2020 20:44

Now all of us that have commented here have done the same sorts of stuff for revenge, namely destroying things, putting substances in their things and alike, whoever said revenge was best served with their head up high is either very very controlled or they’ve never been hurt! We are all/have been at some point ‘psycho’ birds 😂😂😂

rosegoldwatcher · 15/09/2020 20:44

Fiction, but Minny baking a 'chocolate' pie for her horrendous boss Hilly in The Help.

iklboo · 15/09/2020 20:57

Ex left a note on the kitchen table for me to find after work telling me he'd left me for a woman in USA he'd met on the internet. I reported all his bank & credit cards stolen so they were blocked and they'd only send new ones to our house as he had no proof of address over there.

Since he'd taken out joint loans without my knowledge & left me with ££££ of liable debt I thought it was only fair.

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously · 15/09/2020 21:12

How can someone get a joint loan without your knowledge that you are then liable for?

purrswhileheeats · 15/09/2020 21:33

I had to wait for six years to learn of my workplace bully's downfall. She was an utter bitch to me from day one, all passive aggressive stuff like throwing my lunch out and spreading rumours that I was shagging the boss. Half the team sucked up to her while the other half seemed terrified of her, I was a young graduate at the time and didn't have the confidence to stand up to her. She had a lavish lifestyle, expensive cars and an apartment in Spain - all seemed a bit much on her not so fancy salary. She would delight in humiliating me in front of other members of staff.

I eventually left (not because of her). Years later it transpired she was fired for shagging the boss and her husband was sent to prison for having a cannabis farm (explained the luxury cars and property in La Manga). It was the best day of my life when I found this out, she fucking deserved it.

MorvaanReed · 15/09/2020 21:33

Ex Partner, nothing dear about him, was a binge drinking creep, constantly chatting up other women in front of me and trying to take my money. He was one of those who started out acting the perfect boyfriend, charming and considerate until he thought he got me properly under the thumb. I was a lot younger than him, confidence got knocked by him blowing hot and cold and it took me a couple of months to kick him to touch.

I was working in a dodgy area and decided to do a self defence course. I needed to practice the moves, just going through the motions, not actually throwing people about.

I asked him to help. This was when the relationship was already hanging by a thread.

He kept resisting, sneering about how I'd never be able to defend myself against a man.

I threw him across the room.

Well, if I'm honest, I threw him to the floor and he sort of tumbled/rolled the rest of the way. But I prefer my version. Regardless the dent to his ego was ENORMOUS.

Inappropriatefemale · 15/09/2020 21:43

@purrswhileheeats

I had to wait for six years to learn of my workplace bully's downfall. She was an utter bitch to me from day one, all passive aggressive stuff like throwing my lunch out and spreading rumours that I was shagging the boss. Half the team sucked up to her while the other half seemed terrified of her, I was a young graduate at the time and didn't have the confidence to stand up to her. She had a lavish lifestyle, expensive cars and an apartment in Spain - all seemed a bit much on her not so fancy salary. She would delight in humiliating me in front of other members of staff.

I eventually left (not because of her). Years later it transpired she was fired for shagging the boss and her husband was sent to prison for having a cannabis farm (explained the luxury cars and property in La Manga). It was the best day of my life when I found this out, she fucking deserved it.

Sounds like a classic case of jealousy! In a way as much as it’s frightening and hurtful to have someone this jealous of you then there must be something pretty special about you for her to have acted this way, or maybe she was simply jealous of your looks and youth, so many women can be like this and it’s an awful realisation that there are people out there like this and it’s usually from folk you wouldn’t expect, thankfully there’s more good than bad people out there but I believe that each and every one of us have to encounter someone like this in order for us to learn that not all people are normal, and it can make us stronger.
iklboo · 15/09/2020 21:55

How can someone get a joint loan without your knowledge that you are then liable for?

Forged signatures on the paperwork. He worked opposite shifts to me so was home for all the post. A joint loan becomes jointly and severally payable if one party defaults.

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously · 15/09/2020 22:10

If he forged your signature, then surely it has no legal obligation on you. If you are still repaying this, I think you should get legal advice. There are handwriting experts who can prove forged signatures. If you never saw or agreed to it, I'd fight it.

FeellikeEeyore · 15/09/2020 22:12

One of my ex-bf's was a really private person (part of the reason for our split). When we split i "returned" all his belongings to his workplace and marked the envelope URGENT FAO: (HIS NAME) ONLY. I often wonder what he thought when he opened up the letter in full view of his colleagues, in his open plan office to crotchless knickers, his dirty boxers, fluffy handcuffs and vibrator. It felt good.

BashfulClam · 15/09/2020 22:23

My friend removed the fuse from every Appliance that she could open the plug on. It’s not something you check these days and he’s wonder why some things were working and others not. She also removed every light bulb as she bought them so he’d have to sit in the dark with no tv once he realised the bulbs were gone.

CandyLeBonBon · 15/09/2020 22:40

Managed to work out the password to the dating site I'd discovered him on and added a paragraph about him being a lying cheating scum bag and warning off other women.

shreddednips · 15/09/2020 22:49

Some of these are wild, mine is tame in comparison. When I was about 18 I went on holiday with 9 boys, only girl. One of them was obsessed with 'hilarious' pranks and left a massive jobby (one of his own) on the toilet seat in the bathroom. He'd done other stupid things but this was a new low. So my friend and I secreted as much wafer thin ham inside his stuff as I possibly could. In all his pockets, tucked inside his rolled up socks, in every compartment of his wallet, literally in any cranny you could fit a piece of wafer thin ham (pretty much anywhere it turns out), we put it. It was very hot and we had no air conditioning. He was picking ham out of all his stuff for ages once he noticed the smell. I really think he deserved it.

Inappropriatefemale · 15/09/2020 22:56

@shreddednips

Some of these are wild, mine is tame in comparison. When I was about 18 I went on holiday with 9 boys, only girl. One of them was obsessed with 'hilarious' pranks and left a massive jobby (one of his own) on the toilet seat in the bathroom. He'd done other stupid things but this was a new low. So my friend and I secreted as much wafer thin ham inside his stuff as I possibly could. In all his pockets, tucked inside his rolled up socks, in every compartment of his wallet, literally in any cranny you could fit a piece of wafer thin ham (pretty much anywhere it turns out), we put it. It was very hot and we had no air conditioning. He was picking ham out of all his stuff for ages once he noticed the smell. I really think he deserved it.
You say wild I say typical of women that have been fucked over in one or the other Grin
FraughtwithGin · 16/09/2020 05:14

I once baked a batch of chocolate chip biscuits using Ex-Lax.
I was told they were delicious...

sashh · 16/09/2020 06:19

Not my revenge but I was part of it.

My carer's hobby is soap making, he makes an amazing chocolate and oatmeal scrub bar. It looks just like a slice of nutty chocolate energy bar.

A work colleague had given up chocolate for lent, her relative (I think it was BIL) kept eating chocolate in front of her asking if she was missing it.

So she took the soap home and told everyone she was saving it for Easter. Everyone respected this except dick head relative who took a big bite.

I had a dispute with Morrisons.

Most supermarkets take the money from your account when you get a delivery. Morrison's don't it can take a couple of days but I didn't know that so them taking money put me over my overdraft limit and cause me to get bank charges. I don't have a lot of money so this was a disaster.

I tried going through the complaints procedure and had a couple of email saying, WE NOW CONSIDER THIS MATTER CLOSED. Yes they included the capitals.

I ordered another delivery and then cancelled the card.

They requested payment, I emailed saying they had told me on a number of occasions that the matter was closed.

They did not come back to me.

Izzabellasasperella · 16/09/2020 07:48

@Inappropriatefemale you did all that because he went to a club!? Way over the line imo.

awsomer · 16/09/2020 08:01

I hope you reported him for fraud @iklboo ? Why would you just accept that?!

awsomer · 16/09/2020 08:06

@Inappropriatefemale I feel like there must be background to yours.
A) it was way over the top (being 20 doesn’t equate to being a dick)
and B) you broke up with your DP (while pregnant) - your relationship must have already been on the rocks?

ThanksMateThanksMate · 16/09/2020 08:10

My (notso) DF was a terrible bully of a man.
I planned many little revenge victories just to stay sane until I could go nc.

His "precious" special jar of luxury jam that no one was allowed to MOVE let alone eat got spat in regulary.

Also "dipped" his toothbrush a few times.

Going complete Non-Contact is the best revenge /safest life ever. Hallelujah!!!

Bigyellowsunshine · 16/09/2020 10:15

Just remembered something that happened to me years ago - I’d split with my then fiancé and moved out of our house. He packed up all my stuff and moved it to my parents house. When I unpacked it he had only given me the left shoe of every single pair I owned and thrown then right ones away. Well played Grin

iklboo · 16/09/2020 10:43

I did but as they (and I) had no idea where he was - I think he may still be in the US - so far nothing.