Winter birthday, autistic 10yo and no masks...what can I do?

[windyautumn]

Ds is turning 10 in December. He's autistic (pretty high functioning) and can't cope with masks (I know he doesn't have to wear them) but hates us wearing them because we can't communicate properly and he can't read facial expression etc. We just don't go anywhere where we have to wear them as a family.

Anyway, he doesn't have any friends so he doesn't have parties etc. We've always celebrated his birthday with an outing as a family eg science museums, Harry Potter studios, Star Wars exhibits, gaming events etc. It's a big deal for him. A special weekend each year where we really make a fuss (and ignore the fact he has no one but us that care about him on his birthday)

What the hell can I choose for him. I'm stuck. Everywhere indoors needs masks. Not an option. Home party - not an option, see above. Outdoors is mostly shut in early December. Postponing is not an option - autism rules and all that.

Any suggestions PLEASE help!!

Is there an indoor water park?

Could you hire a hall somewhere and possibly get one of those companies that do the really cool science type parties ? Or a gaming bus ? They may be more lenient about masks

@NC4Now

Is there an indoor water park?

Hmmm that's a thought....are they relatively 'normal' in functioning these days or are there lots of rules? None of the fun pools here have opened yet but I could scout around for a water park further afield - thanks.

Keep them coming!!

@Babysadness

Could you hire a hall somewhere and possibly get one of those companies that do the really cool science type parties ? Or a gaming bus ? They may be more lenient about masks

The thing is, he has no friends, siblings or relatives. It's just the 3 of us. Any form of 'party' is a total stick the knife in to how different he is and how sad it makes him feel. These would be perfect if he had a small peer group 😢

I'm sure you can be exempt from wearing masks if you have someone with you that replies on seeing your face to communicate? Worth checking before you rule it out

Alton Towers is sometimes “somewhat” open in December. They would want a mask for indoor things and that might include some of the open attractions. The hotels are open most years, hopefully this. There are “Fairytale Woodland lodges” with their own entrance which we thought safer with Covid. If open in December they have a double bed and a bunk bed area for up to 5.
Check what is open- it won’t be everything in the adverts at that time of year. for an autistic child you can ask for a pass, and he and his small group wouldn’t usually have to join regular queues.

@LittleBlueBee

I'm sure you can be exempt from wearing masks if you have someone with you that replies on seeing your face to communicate? Worth checking before you rule it out

I guess....but seeing the way people are on here, I just can't see us not being asked constantly why we aren't wearing masks and DS would get really anxious and upset if he had to keep saying that he's autistic and has a social communication disorder. And people being cross! Even clear masks are a no go as we look strange and things are 'different' which raises his anxiety.

Other Merlin attractions like Legoland, Chessington also have some opening in the run up to Christmas. Same for zoos. Again, not everything that is open in the summer but it might be enough!

@OneEpisode

Alton Towers is sometimes “somewhat” open in December. They would want a mask for indoor things and that might include some of the open attractions. The hotels are open most years, hopefully this. There are “Fairytale Woodland lodges” with their own entrance which we thought safer with Covid. If open in December they have a double bed and a bunk bed area for up to 5. Check what is open- it won’t be everything in the adverts at that time of year. for an autistic child you can ask for a pass, and he and his small group wouldn’t usually have to join regular queues.

I was just about to ask if any theme parks are open in December because I felt like they would be closed right at the beginning of Dec but worth looking in to actually.

But his birthday is treats for him. If he isn’t on usual days allowed MacD drive though and to eat in the car, or pizza in the best room, that might be plenty!

Does anywhere do outdoor light festivald near you? They may still run. For example Kew have an outdoor trail with everything lit up - then at the end are food stalls. Its normally too crowded for my son but covid restrictions may work in your favour as open places are limiting numbers more to keep crowds down.

Zoo, outdoor adventures like Go ape, segway, go karting, or maybe a theme park?

Have to wear masks at theme parks.

Expensive for a birthday but a weekend at centreparcs? Lots of outdoor activities that you can choose weather-dependent, think the pools are open now too.

Harry Potter walk around London, there are a fair few themed walks.

@OneEpisode

But his birthday is treats for him. If he isn’t on usual days allowed MacD drive though and to eat in the car, or pizza in the best room, that might be plenty!

Maccy's in the car is pretty standard in these woods 🤣

@MillieEpple

Does anywhere do outdoor light festivald near you? They may still run. For example Kew have an outdoor trail with everything lit up - then at the end are food stalls. Its normally too crowded for my son but covid restrictions may work in your favour as open places are limiting numbers more to keep crowds down.

That's a good though - I'll look into it. He loves lights and all things sensory.

@questionssquestions

Zoo, outdoor adventures like Go ape, segway, go karting, or maybe a theme park?

Segway and go karting.....brilliant suggestions thank you!

We took our autistic son to Alton towers splash landings for his birthday. We then spent the night in their splash landing hotel and then spent the next day in the waterpark again (he wouldn't have coped with the theme park.)

@pinguwings

Expensive for a birthday but a weekend at centreparcs? Lots of outdoor activities that you can choose weather-dependent, think the pools are open now too.

Have never been but generally we avoid places where there are lots of others or activities where he will have to be with other children doing them etc...does centreparcs 'feel' busy when you're there?

Zoo? They're mostly outdoor, so you'd need warm clothes, but we went to Colchester in July, and no-one was wearing masks.

@RandomMess

Harry Potter walk around London, there are a fair few themed walks.

That's a good thought too - thank you!

I know you’ve just commented on this but, the gov guidance states this under their section “when you do not need to wear a face covering”:

if you are speaking to or providing assistance to someone who relies on lip reading, clear sound or facial expressions to communicate

as for people questioning your reasons for not wearing a covering if you’re out, a simple “we are exempt” without explanation is enough. Plus, from all the comments on here about coverings, you’d should be aware that it’s illegal for people to question you’re non-wearing.

@LunaLoveFood

We took our autistic son to Alton towers splash landings for his birthday. We then spent the night in their splash landing hotel and then spent the next day in the waterpark again (he wouldn't have coped with the theme park.)

Thanks for this. I might look into going here. It's quite far away but worth a look.

Longleat will have their festival of light around that time of year.