What things have fucked you over that you'd never expect?

[OrangeLavenders]

I have one. Last night I posted because I had a sudden and agonising pain in the ball of my foot. It was like something broke. I went to out of hours and it all turns out to be a condition called 'Metatarsalgia'. It's nerve related and if simple treatments don't work, I'm looking at surgery that may cause complete numbness in the toes for life Nothing caused it that we know of. I wear sketchers most of the time when not working. Don't even exercise much to cause it.

Trigeminal neuralgia. Was diagnosed with a brain tumor just after my 17th birthday and with 1 year old ds, will have to keep having debulking surgeries every 10-15 years and my pain and other symptoms will never fully go away :(

@SchrodingersKitty I’m so sorry to hear that about your dh . We recently lost a close family friend to lymphoma in his mid fifties.

And thank you for being kind to me back on the lungs threads in March when I was having a bad time with covid. I’m still unwell so that’s my unexpected life turn I suppose.

Becoming disabled in my early thirties. Everything is a struggle daily now and I only survive, not live. I am very bitter and hurt by this.

My dad dying when I was 13. Depression. Underactive thyroid-- boy I did not see that one coming. Fatigue, depression, weight gain, terrible joint pain, unable to work for years. It really buggered things up.

Marriage. And my guts.

@IpanemaSunshine: sorry to hear about your lungs still being bad. Mine flared up for a while but seem to be ok at the moment. And thanks for the flowers. Lymphoma is a bugger.

Being emetophobic

I try not to let it affect me and still live a normal life but it’s still this constant anxiety in the back of my head that stops me enjoying things as much as I used to.

It also caused me to spend a lot of money on hypnotherapy which didn’t work at all!

Bipolar disorder
A child with a learning disability and autism

Restless leg syndrome
Bipolar
Death of my sister
Multiple miscarriages
The strange marriage I find myself in

However, I do have a gorgeous son.

People who are having problems with Sketchers - what style are you wearing? Is it the slip-on Go Walk style?

I wear a pair at work, picked them because they're plain black, lace-up and (important for me) non-leather .

memory foam, it is the devils material for feet not the case at all, in fact memory foam is used in many Surgical Appliances insoles for patients with Rheumatoid Arthritis in their feet . Its a godsend , cushioning and doesn't bottom out .

I think the style of shoes rather than the brand can be the issue , my Sketchers really cosset my feet like walking on air . I have very narrow bony pronated feet , my feet would yell with pain if they even LOOKED at a ballet pump .

My unexpected Fucked Me Over - Menopause . My body is trying to kill me till Im wizzened and hormoneless .

@70isaLimitNotaTarget I can only wear supportive trainers like Nike which have firm insoles matching my foot / walking style. (Collapsed arches so cannot do flat shoes at all or memory foam which I find agonising) Mind I've had all sorts of orthotics made by the podiatrist, so maybe I'm just a Princess and the Pea foot style diva!

Am totally with you on the menopause. I'm peri and this summer has really ramped up. I'm supposed to be getting HRT next week, but my BP keeps fucking me over. So I'll add BP to the list too.

In short, the last 12 fucking months. Covid was just the icing on the cake with all the crap I've gone through this past year! My sister was diagnosed with cancer and sadly passed away two weeks ago. Before that we had a load of shit with our house and had to move suddenly. Work has been a nightmare and thankfully I'm moving on soon. I still sit and think to myself 'this time last year....' and can't believe how much has changed.

Fear of making a change. I've been feeling immobilized by it lately.

DV. Out now but it’s changed me massively and I still replay events and analyse them all the time. I’m very happy with my life now but I’m definitely a very different person. Getting out was expensive too, I’m still repaying divorce debt.

My parents having dementia and dying. I’m only early thirties and spent my twenties organising care packages and dealing with hospitals. It over shadowed everything and completely took over my life for years. I still feel panicky if I get a withheld number call as I assume it’s a hospital or nursing home and il have to go and sort a problem

My childhood. Violent and angry father, psychopathic bully of a step-father, a mother who didn't know how to protect me, and CSA at the hands of a family friend. It took 37 years, lots of therapy, my adult autism diagnosis, and various types of medication for me to truly heal and my mental health to stabilise. I'm very content with life now and I'm determined that my DC will only know love, respect and security.

Stage 3 ovarian cancer at the age of 33, theory being it was triggered by hormonal changed of pregnancy (not that I would EVER let my incredibke DC know that). Lucky to be alive and all that blah blah blah but the surgical menopause followed by chemo induced Polymyalgia Rheumatica has left me overweight (and can't lose it, just getting fatter no matter how hard I diet and exercise), and in constant pain, stiff, achy and sexless and seriously old before my time. I'm in my early 40's now and terrified of how I'll cope in a year, let alone 10 or 20 (that's if the cancer doesn't come back, very high recurrence rate and every fellow sufferer I met on 'my journey' is now dead). I used to be a serious amateur athlete, outgoing, confident and felt sexy....

Marriage, or specifically my ex-h. He was financially and emotionally abusive. I went into the relationship trusting, treating people the way I would want to be treated, and thinking the best of people unless proved otherwise. That all went as a result of the marriage. I lost all confidence in being able judge someone's character and has impacted not just the way I feel about other people (and particularly men) but also my energy/enthusiasm levels.

Getting bacterial meningitis twice in 3 years and have a csf leak. Who knew Dr google was right when I googled drippy nose. Leak all fixed but still on tablets to make sure the csf pressure doesn’t go high. Dealing with the unseen after effects of the meningitis a year on and trying hard not get health anxiety.

@joeysapple

I was sorry to read your post. I am an EWO and we do huge amounts of work with school refusers. Supportive work, not punishing parents. It's difficult and exhausting for parents. If you wanted to message me I might be able to help?

@madcatladyforever @Deathraystare
I have apnoea- i cried when they told me I'd need CPAP. Now you'd have to fight me to take it away from me. Life saver.

My surprise thing was Ulcerative Colitis. Going from someone who'd never had anything wrong with them- to hospitalisation with excruciating gut pain/steroids/ immunosuppression and potential surgery always on the cards.

And having to scope out every trip for the toilets - and learning to accept that sometimes if I'm having a flare I may shit myself. Like a fucking toddler.

For people with foot pain, try the plantar fasciitis insoles on Amazon for about £7. Mine still took about 12 months to go completely but the insoles in all my shoes plus Fitflops instead of normal sandals meant I could walk everywhere without being in agony.

@Fuss I was going to say something similar. I have hypermobile joints and if I go through periods of either inactivity or wearing the wrong shoes, my knees partially dislocate in my sleep and it's agony. I used to do Brazilian Jiu Jitsu but a certain brand of sandals changed my gait sufficirntly enough that I dislocated one during a total non pressurised move on the mat with my experienced coach, who was basically just setting up positions to see how I dealt with them - presumingly so he could give me a belt stripe. I never got it, couldn't roll again after! I have dislocated other knee once before, getting off a stool (!) and that was a fucker to rehab. I was 19 and didn't know I was hypermobile. It gave me pain for years. The best thing I've found for it is climbing (and maintaining a healthy weight for my frame, which is not happening at the mo). Excess sugar makes my joints inflamed too, and eating or drinking something sweet in the evening gives me kidney pain that can make it hard to breathe by the morning! I don't drink alcohol at all because that really hurts. Have also given caffeine up after it exacerbated anxiety massively. Do you have proprioception issues too? Walking down hills with the dog is a fecking nightmare!!!

Re foot pain, teva sandals (the moulded, walking kind) have been good for me. I second dr martens too but wear them in gradually. Do not go for the basic flat Tevas or the platform ones (literal fashion victim here).