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Original poster

These are perfectly valid reasons to choose the private school?

115 replies

Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 14:02

We've opted to send reception age DS to private school where he has been at nursery (they are a 0-11 school, DD is also in the nursery). We chose the nursery because it was nice, mid priced, hours and location worked for us. We always intended that he'd go to the local state primary, and we applied there and got in. I then started planning for before and after school care, holiday care etc and it is an absolute nightmare! The state school relies on off-site out of school provision or child minders, which are all full. The off-site wrap around care is extortionate (£25 per day) and is block book per term only. So we'd need to block book full weeks, though would only need 3 days provision most weeks (but changes weekly, at short notice). Holiday club doesn't take reception kids. The only local one that does is 10-3 which is pretty useless. And the cost! It's almost the same per week as nursery!

The school attached to DSs nursery has onsite wrap around provision at £3.50 per session, no booking required. Holiday club is £15, 8-6, onsite plus a few trips which cost extra. The fees are £3500 per year but when I've done the maths it works out at about £50 per month more than state school when you include the wrap around and holiday care.

£50 for a lot less faff seems very reasonable!

But my mum and some friends seem to have a real issue with the idea of private school. Is it a bad idea? It's not a posh school, it's not full of really rich kids. Most parents are professionals like us and choose to pay for education over foreign holidays etc.

So we've put his name down and paid his deposit. Are we making a massive mistake?

Educationally both schools seem fine, they have strengths in different areas.

OP posts:
FinallyRelief · 09/07/2020 15:24

Wow! Cheap here they are about £4K a term!

I think I would worry more about the standard of education and what they offer at that price!

Original poster
Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 15:26

Definitely not Steiner/ religious school

OP posts:
Original poster
Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 15:28

Standard of education seems pretty good, from what we've seen. They don't seem to just concentrate on the entrance exams either in the upper years, which is my main concern. Seems to be about fostering a love of learning which is an ethos I can get on board with.

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Childcare & nursery Families General education Primary education
TinySleepThief · 09/07/2020 15:32

Standard of education seems pretty good, from what we've seen.

I honestly don't doubt it is but I'm struggling to see how good it can be when the amount paid in fees per class wouldn't even cover the wages of their teacher and TA let alone everything else??

ineedaholidaynow · 09/07/2020 15:33

@BerriesAndLeaves not all Primary schools get £5k we are closer to £3k, which is why some schools are absolutely on their knees. So I would like to know how a Private school can afford to charge such low fees and still provide a good service

Embracelife · 09/07/2020 15:35

if it really is that cheap then go for it
So long as it provides good education

eurochick · 09/07/2020 15:38

That is extraordinarily cheap. Ours is around a grand a month.

StealthPolarBear · 09/07/2020 15:39

I think the school I linked to also receives the money from the state - is that the free school model? Could that explain it?

SerenityNowwwww · 09/07/2020 15:41

It does sound very cheap. Even the ones near us that are subsidised by foreign governments are way more expensive.

Disfordarkchocolate · 09/07/2020 15:44

I know some who did this. They said they got used to paying for nursery and continued there because their child was happy and the wrap round care was fantastic. Their child did homework, music and dance as part of the after school provision and it meant where they were home there was no running about on an evening. I was jealous when she explained all of this.

BlankTimes · 09/07/2020 15:47

But my mum and some friends seem to have a real issue with the idea of private school

Why are you so bothered about what other people think?

It's your money to organise into priorities and spend however you like.

Some people with the same amount of children, same ages, same income and outgoings as you would choose to do exactly what you are doing.
Other people with the same amount of children, same ages, same income and outgoings as you would choose to do something completely different.

What does it matter?

Why do you feel you have to justify your choices to anyone?

Villanemme · 09/07/2020 16:04

Just been googling IGS Durham linked by @StealthPolarBear. How does this school operate? It claims to be self-funding but that is absolutely impossible! It's only £250 a month. Time will tell I suppose, it's only been operating for a couple of years.

RedOasis · 09/07/2020 16:15

Why would you be making a mistake? If the cost is much the same but you get the childcare when you need it, and your kids are getting a good education it doesn’t matter that’s it’s private and not state school. If you’re family are outraged then maybe they could help with the childcare? But ultimately it’s your choice and it really has nothing to do with your family. As long as your kids get a good education what does it matter where they go? And they’re happy?

StealthPolarBear · 09/07/2020 16:33

Villanemme I considered sending my dc there as it was opening. I did some research and didn't like what I saw, I predicted it'd close within a year. I was wrong!
That said, I understood they got the govt funding as well.

Regularsizedrudy · 09/07/2020 16:34

“Most parents are professionals like us and choose to pay for education over foreign holidays etc. ”

If I had a £ for every time I heard this from a private school parent! Ah yes those silly poor people, of course they could afford it if they didn’t waste their money on holidays EnvyHmm

FinallyRelief · 09/07/2020 16:39

Returning to your OP - I don't see what it's got to do with anyone else. Your child your money - if it bothers them that much tell them it's bloody cheap!

FinallyRelief · 09/07/2020 16:40

Happy to send you links of prep schools round here and their fees to help if you like!

Haworthia · 09/07/2020 17:57

Grin @Regularsizedrudy

Snobby and blinkered. We can’t afford private education OR foreign holidays.

Original poster
Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 18:38

Regularsizedrudy I meant as in they are the elite mega rich, just fairly normal people, doctors, teachers etc. But I don't think it's an unreasonable thing to say (that we can't afford both, because we can't) I appreciate many people can't afford either and some people can afford both. I also have a friend who can't believe we can afford private school, then I point out to her that her last holiday cost them 10k, which is the cost of 2 kids at school.

OP posts:
Original poster
Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 18:44

As for secondary school, were in semi-selective area with a few grammars lurking about. We'd hope to get them in one of those if they are academic.

OP posts:
PaquitaVariation · 09/07/2020 18:46

@StealthPolarBear

Villanemme I considered sending my dc there as it was opening. I did some research and didn't like what I saw, I predicted it'd close within a year. I was wrong! That said, I understood they got the govt funding as well.
I know this school, we’re from Durham too. It’s very popular with families who use it and is in talks to extend into ks3 within two years. The £50 per week for very small class sizes is probably why it’s popular! I thought it would struggle too but it doesn’t seem to be.
icelollycraving · 09/07/2020 18:59

I’m amazed it’s that cheap! Obviously this fact has derailed the thread.
My sister sent her dd to private and used to try to push this as the best thing. I always said I would only do it if I could guarantee I could pay the fees and all that goes with it with no issue. A few years on and they’ve seriously struggled after job losses.

Original poster
Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 19:07

icelollycraving yeah, I think that's my biggest concern, it's the long term financial commitment. But we are both in stable industries/ roles (tech & NHS) so fingers crossed should be ok.

My concern about what others thought was mainly whether there were pitfalls I hadn't considered but looks like there aren't as most of the issues with private school don't apply here (long holidays, expensive additional costs).

OP posts:
Original poster
Fandanglethat · 09/07/2020 19:49

Decision made.

Especially as I've just read another thread about September wrap around care which has made me think - the local state school wrap around care is off-site because it takes from 3 schools. I'm not sure how that would work covid-wise. It's essentially a scout hut so no way to segregate the kids from different schools. Plus will it even be running? I know that the wrap around care is running at the private school (because it's running now.

OP posts:
Username7521 · 09/07/2020 22:31

Op just word of warning (my experience might be different for you). We always said private as primary and state secondary but once we got to secondary for us transferring time back in was something that we didn’t have the energy for, as ultimately we left it too late. Plus we were ready to the level of 121 care of private that we couldn’t emulate in even a grammar school. We’ve had to suck up secondary school fees too. (They are going to a highly selective school, we’ll see what happens to the next one as he might not be academic enough)
Basically what I’m saying is we found it difficult to swop out. I’m sure others didn’t but it’s our experience.
So you might be in it for the long haul!

I still don’t regret the decision
Good luck
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