Heartbroken my dog bit my toddler

[Motherofmonsters]

I'm so upset, I know what I need to do but it's so hard.

Ive had him for 10years and he is the soppiest dog in the world, if you're an adult. He's always been wary of children so I've kept them apart and they were getting on so much better.

But today he bit my DS on the face when he was behind him as we were leaving the house. Nothing serious but he has a couple marks by his mouth.

I'm so absolutely gutted

I was also a child that was bitten a few times by our “family” dog, as was my DSis. No provocation, he was just not a well adjusted dog. We were made to cover it up and lie about it so my dad wouldn’t have it PTS. But in the end it came to that anyway. It was an absolutely shit position for myself and DSis to be in, being told the dogs life or death was down to us. Honestly OP, if you want to try and rehome the dog then do so but you do need to do either that or PTS. You can’t keep it now.

I 100% get your scenario and it's awful what happened. But I would 100% suggest speaking to a dog trainer and NOT take any advice from people off here this is solely your decision.

My word there's a lot of instant dog behaviour experts on here today!

OP.

Write a statement NOW, to yourself, as to what EXACTLY happened prior to the bite, the bite itself and what happened afterwards.

Take photos of the bite.

Now ask yourself and your partner honestly if you can manage the situation so that this cannot occur again?

If you can do that, then find a reputable behaviourist - APBC, ABTC, COAPE etc.. not some fly by night 'dog whisperer' wannabe, LOOK for professional bodies, those listed above require actual externally verified assessment and are not simply 'pay to join' clubs as sadly many are...

See what they say - if you can manage safely (and after all you have for some time!) and put in the work, great.

If you CANNOT, for whatever reason, then you have investigated all reasonable avenues, and whether you rehome or euthanise, you have done all the right things.

I will say, from your description alone, it does sound as if your dog has inhibited his bite, this reads like a level 2 bite on the Dunbar bite scale (apdt.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/ian-dunbar-dog-bite-scale.pdf) which is not in and of itself a reason to immediately euthanise without further investigation.

This also does NOT signify that things cannot be improved, or that either dog or child cannot be kept safe within the same home.

However it does suggest that your dog feels uncomfortable and you have missed some communication or taken your eye off the ball somewhat.

To be clear, your dog COULD have done serious, significant damage.. he did not, not because anyone moved quick enough, not because he made an error, but PURELY because he had NO intention of doing so in the first place. That means there is scope for improvement, your dog is NOT incurable or inherently aggressive.

Please seek expert help and not the advice of keyboard warriors and pearl clutching dog haters on here!

Jesus Christ you do not need to have the dog put to sleep. How many Border Collies have you heard of killing children? Get an outside run and kennel so that the dog has its own outdoor space. Get a dog walker or enrol on Borrow My Dog and request borrowers with no children. BC's have a deep seated herding instinct, are incredibly intelligent and need exercise. The dog was rounding the child up not trying to kill it.

Poor you. Blimey though, biting on the face is seriously scary. I don’t think you can train that ‘what if?’ risk away with all the will in the world.

I agree the dog shouldn't be put down, someone without children could adopt and keep him on a lead.
If you take him to a rescue centre they will make sure he goes to the right home.

I wonder if all the posters who want it PTS wish the same on human's that do wrong to be be PTS.

The dog should live it's days out with loving adults who don't let small children near it.

Was your toddler doing anything to provoke the dog? Is the dog otherwise healthy? Ie not going blind, dead etc. I would see if you can Re home him to an adults only home if you can. Such a hard decision to have to make

@soruff

The dog has to be put down, would you rest if you thought it had been allowed to put another child in danger? Please do the right thing for children.

You do know there are some people who don’t see a child from one years end to the next? People who would love to offer an ageing dog a peaceful and contented home for his twilight years?

There are some seriously worrying responses on this thread.

OP, you know you cannot have the dog around your toddler any longer. I would speak to your vet and have the dog checked over in the first instance. Our previously adorable 9 year old dog turned and bit someone out of the blue one day. We had him checked out and he had a brain tumour. I'm not saying that this is the case but a health check would be sensible. Then, talk to the vet about rehoming - please do not put your dog on facebook.

As a family, we waited until our youngest was 8 before we got ddog. I've always had dogs and love them to bits but I would never have any dog round very young children. Those who say it's bollocks and 'I know my dog' are deluded at best and have never seen the damage even a relatively small dog can do. Really sorry you're having to deal with this OP.

wonder if all the posters who want it PTS wish the same on human's that do wrong to be be PTS.

Have you ever had a dog, or any pet need to be PTS because of illness? Most adults will have experienced this. Have you ever had an ill relative euthanised? Well there's your answer. Pets and humans aren't really comparable are they?

Dog threads bring out the batshit on here.

@Hardbackwriter

Hopefully you will continue to keep them apart as much as possible

Hopefully the dog will be put down which should ensure that pretty effectively! Are you actually, seriously suggesting the dog could stay in the house with the child and just kept apart 'as possible'?

Idiot.

Wow. My heart goes out to you OP. I have a little dog and am pregnant with my first DC. I just couldn't imagine having to rehome my dog, she is my baby. Maybe you could talk to and get advice from a dog trainer or vet before making any further long term decisons?

"Now ask yourself and your partner honestly if you can manage the situation so that this cannot occur again?"

The dog is capable of independant thought its not like a computer you can progam to behave a certain way. There is no way they can guarantee it will not happen again. I think their duty to their child is greater than their feelings toward the dog.

thewisp

Piss off, I'm not batshit.

There are some people that need putting down though.

You do have options but of course only you know what’s best for the dog. I rehomed a dog last year that went on to strike at my dd, the rescue I got him from would not take him back as they didn’t have space, RSPCA agreed to take him and he was rehomed with a childless family. It’s harder as it’s a older dog but you would be surprised who would take a older collie.

@Somethingorotherorother

This is why I am 100% against having dogs and children in the same households.

I truly believe there is not a single dog that can be genuinely, absolutely trusted with a small child. I do not think there are any dogs that would never under any circumstances bite or swipe at a child.

Dogs can be brilliant pets. They do not belong in houses with small children.

I know of so many cases, including my own, where dogs and small children have happily shared a house. My two terrier girls used to lie on a rug next to our babies/toddlers, or under their pram and were gentle and loving. We had the first baby when the first terriers were still youngjust 10 monthsand perhaps that made the difference.

The OP's situation is tragic and I feel so sorry for her.

Stop making excuses for this dog. It bit a child! What next? Yeah, it's heartbreaking but stop putting ideas of rehoming/keeping the dog into her head. It's dangerous.
I don't know what I dislike more, dogs or their irresponsible owners who always peddle out the 'my dog wouldn't hurt a fly' bullshit that they always seem to do.

Please, please try to rehome first!!

My retired Dad (who has had many dogs over his lifetime) took in an older dog in that had bitten a small child. The owners were insisting that she should be put down, but were persuaded by my friend to wait a few days and in that time my friend asked around to find someone that they knew were experienced with dogs, could give a good home and were prepared to take her after what she had done.

I suggested that my Dad went to meet her - I took Dad over there and an hour later we left with her. Dad and her bonded straight away and they never looked back.

She never did anything like that again. She was not at all keen on children and he would avoid them with her in the park etc by keeping her on her lead there, but even if a child went near her (on pavement etc) she would just put Dad between her and the child.

She never showed any actual signs of aggression again. She lived another seven, very happy years with Dad, they were devoted to each other.

There is a chance that someone will take him, please just hold on and ask around or try some of the rescues before PTS!

but is equally great with my nieces too. she’s had babies crying around her, toddlers laying all over her

That's bad dog ownership. It does my swede in when parents let their kids crawl all over dogs. No respect for them at all.

Just because the dog is old and has health problems does not mean you can’t rehome him. Places like DogsTrust find homes for all kinds of dogs. There are people out there who are really dedicated dog lovers and will gladly take a dog rather than see it put down.

I had a dog which I didn't trust then I got pregnant. Even before my child was born I had her rehomed. The dog lived a happy life with a lovely older couple who had experience with that breed.

Don’t worry about being flamed. No one has ever been you and in your position. It’s really easy to judge from behind a keyboard. You wouldn’t be a good mum or a good animal owner if it wasn’t hard. I hope you are ok.

Yabu for posting this on here. You already know what you need to do. I'm surprised though that No one has yet suggested rehoming your toddler and keeping the dog.

If you are minded to rehome the dog then I would be asking for offers by email. That way you can screen out anybody unable to compose a coherent sentence. That way the dog should and up goint to a person with at least a modicum of brainpower who is

i) somebody who knows how to look after it
ii) somebody who understands its history and will ensure is not allowed near children.