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Do you live in your home town...or would you move back?

66 replies

OfUselessBooks · 02/07/2020 00:34

We're contemplating a move "home" having moved away from there over a decade ago. We moved for work, and that reason is no longer there, so we're left wondering why we are miles away from our families and friends.

Where we live is very expensive, but with a lot of nice towns and places to go, close to London with more job opportunities. However, our parents are getting older and we would love to be near them and extended family. We had no ties when we moved away and it was all an adventure. Now we have a mortgage and a young family and it seems we have to make a decision as to where we want to live, having not really given too much thought to it before!

Do you live in your home town, or did you move back after a long time? How did you find it? It feels like going backwards in a way, but I'm not sure where else we would choose. Where we live we have some friends and good schools, but we only came for work really. I would miss some things, but being near everyone instead of visiting two or three times a year would be fantastic. We would only have a very tiny mortgage if we moved, so could have a much slower pace of life and more time with the kids. If you have settled somewhere else, would you go back if you had the chance?

OP posts:
ArriettyJones · 02/07/2020 00:36

Nope. Definitely not. Grin

safariboot · 02/07/2020 00:48

Yes. It's Birmingham. And I don't care what outsiders say, I like it here.

jackparlabane · 02/07/2020 00:48

Hell no. (Small Surrey town)
Left to go to uni, never moved back. It's a bit better than it was, but full of obnoxious City workers and their families who want to move out of London with their children. There's no-one between the ages of 18 and 35...

MsEllany · 02/07/2020 00:49

No and no.

I live in the NW. I’m from Watford. I could quite happily never go back there.

If I had the money I would move to London though.

alwayscrashinginthesamecar1 · 02/07/2020 00:51

Not for all the tea in China. I got out of small town NI when I went to uni and never went back. My mum moved away too, so I haven't set foot in the shithole since I was 20. I moved to London after uni, and ended up in Australia, that's just about far enough away for me.

MrFaceyRomford · 02/07/2020 01:05

No and yes, if it was the posh bit (thing £1.5M for something tiny). Otherwise no and no.

SauvignonGrower · 02/07/2020 01:30

We moved within half an hour of 'home'. It's been great, but now I've got itchy feet to move back into my 'home' village. I love love love my family though - tons of brothers, sisters and cousins so it isn't all about supporting the older generation (though we will of course).

Bingowin · 02/07/2020 01:35

I think I'd like to move back to my home town (in Somerset). We live in london and my DH hates it. Trouble is,there is no work at all in my field in Somerset!
So.... I need a complete career change in order to do it. Would be mortgage free though!

Boomerwang · 02/07/2020 04:46

My dad was in the army so I don't have a home town as we were posted around Europe. The place I lived the longest in was Birmingham and I have mixed feelings. There's loads to do there which is great, but there's a lot not to like too.

Anyway I'm in a different country now, and although I miss the UK after weighing up pros and cons I don't think I'd come back to live there.

I think what is more important is not to view your home town as it was before, but what it could be to you if you explore it properly. Friends and family make the rest of it much better.

chatwoo · 02/07/2020 04:52

... maybe. Not my #1 choice though!

yinnybun · 02/07/2020 04:55

Yep, DH & I are both Londoners & we live very close to where we grew up. I love having our parents close by, my mums is a 15 min walk.

We have discussed moving further out but struggle with leaving family.

VeggieSausageRoll · 02/07/2020 04:58

No, simply because my mother lives there and I went NC a few years ago.

If I had a good relationship with my parents, could reduce and therefore give my children potentially a better quality of life (more disposable income for holidays? Sports clubs? Etc.) more time with grandparents and other family, and it didn't involve any school changes - absolutely

Redglitter · 02/07/2020 05:06

Yes and I love it. I moved away for about 20 years and moved back a few years ago. I love being back

My Mum lives less than a mile away as does my oldest friend. My house had almost none of my 'must have' things but location won every time.

It's amazing how many people I was at school with are still local

Camomila · 02/07/2020 05:30

My original town is in Italy so no, but I live in my 'new' home town where my parents moved to when we moved to England...moved back after living in London/Kent/Surrey.

It's Brighton so not small and plenty for the DSs to do when they are older.

Camomila · 02/07/2020 05:32

It's amazing how many people I was at school with are still local

Me too, if it wasn't for the pandemic I'd have so many ready made 'mum friends' to go for coffee with :(

Mintjulia · 02/07/2020 05:36

No, it has changed beyond recognition. It was very rural and is now a faceless London dormitory with thousands of thrown-up houses and no community.

All my family have left.

Aebj · 02/07/2020 05:41

I would hate to move back to my home town and haven’t been back for 4 years. I grew up in a sleepy Devon village , which was great for primary school ages but the pits as soon as I started secondary school.
I’m ex military and spent time in London. It’s one of the best cities in the world and would have a holiday home there ( but would have to have mega bucks and that’s never going to happen!!)
I love where I live now and would find it very hard to move.

Isthisfinallyit · 02/07/2020 05:47

Didn't you make sny new friends in that decade away? It sounds to me that that is your problem more than anything.

SailingAwayIntoSunrise · 02/07/2020 05:51

Sort of.

I'm about 15 minutes from where I grew up but my parents moved an hour away from there (so are now 45 minutes away from me).

My new area is quite big with everything we need and we're a 10 min walk train station, shops and beautiful lake (hometown was small country village with no PT)

I moved from London back to Australia and I couldn't be happier Smile

newtb · 02/07/2020 06:04

No, I don't live there - about 800 miles south and
No, I wouldn't go back.

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie · 02/07/2020 06:17

I do. I am ten mins from my parents and sister and love that we all live so close. I don't actually have any friends from the old days as they've moved away or we have lost touch. The friends I do have aren't originally from my town.

SnuggyBuggy · 02/07/2020 06:20

I was bullied horribly at school so for me it's a no. I did spend a few years there after uni and just hated it. It didn't feel possible to forge a social life whilst avoiding the people I went to school with.

I now live 200 miles away and it's hard being so far from family but it's meant being able to meet new people and go to things like baby groups which I couldn't have done in my home town.

Mightymurphy · 02/07/2020 06:29

No. We live about 40 minutes from where I grew up and 20 from where DH grew up. Wouldn’t go back. Mine is a city and DH a big town. We live rurally now.

user1493413286 · 02/07/2020 06:34

I wouldn’t move back to my home town and me and DH are from different places anyway but we did recently move to a small town from a much busier area and are within an hour from DHs family and some close friends so can visit them in a day. We’ve also been able to buy a much bigger house. It wouldn’t have been a move I’d have done before children but now things like a house and being closer to family feels more important than being somewhere with lots to do etc

madwoman1ntheattic · 02/07/2020 06:36

No. And possibly but it could only be for retirement and it would fuck my pension due to world wandering. And would mean I lived on a different continent to my kids and ultimate grandkids. We never rule it out though. If the kids ever go ‘back’ then I think we would. Probably somewhere cheaper though Grin