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Original poster

I snapped at a stranger.

60 replies

DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 11:04

I work for the nhs and currently I'm asked to show my ID every time I enter the hospital. Yesterday morning I was entering the building, hot, bothered and distracted (for many reasons, life is tough atm). I took a face covering from the box at the entrance and then heard the MASSIVE burly security guard bark what I thought was "HYGIENE!", I said "pardon?" and again he stated (what I thought was) "HYGIENE!!" (this guy had a strong accent and an aggressive manner). I was confused and flustered because there was a queue of workers growing behind me, then I noticed the sanitiser gel and assumed that he wanted me to gel my hands. I squirted my hands with gel and grumbled to the woman next to me that the gel doesn't do anything as it doesn't protect against viruses... I then walked away, slightly shaken at the guard's abrupt manner. As I was entering the lift to go up to my floor, the woman who had been stood behind me came walking past, she waited for me to step into the lift and shouted "HE WAS ASKING FOR YOUR ID!!!" I was so taken aback that this woman shouted at me, that I pressed the 'open door' button and stepped back out and shouted back to her "NO HE WASN'T, HE WAS SAYING HYGIENE!", she shouted something back to me which I didn't hear and that was that. As my day progressed I realised that the woman was right and that the guy was probably saying "ID" (as I had forgotten to show it) and I hadn't understood because of his accent. Now I can't stop thinking about it, I feel like I made a fool of myself. The security guard probably thought I ignored his request on purpose, everyone in the queue will have thought I was rude and purposely didn't compy with the request, and the shouty woman just thinks I'm an ignorant idiot (though why she didn't tell me what he was saying when she was stood next to me, and instead chose to shout at me as I entered the lift, I don't know? She could have solved the problem there and then.). I wish I could go and explain to everyone that I didn't understand what the guy was saying, it's eating me up. Now I'm planning to walk the long way round to work as I'm embarrassed to see any of these people again. I know I'm obsessing and everyone else involved will have forgotten about it, but I'm such a stress head and it's making me feel so bad :-(

OP posts:
campion · 27/06/2020 12:03

If he'd said "Can I see your ID" ,even added a "please", then you wouldn't have got flustered.
It wasn't your fault that he didn't communicate properly.
The busybody woman was just rude.

Hopeful57 · 27/06/2020 12:04

These things happen. I wouldn't worry.

wildone84 · 27/06/2020 12:13

I think you should forget about it. It was a simple misunderstanding and it sounds like his manner was rude and aggressive, and that caught you off guard.

lljkk · 27/06/2020 12:17

That's the sort of rubbish experience that would upset me for a day too. Just got to let go. If it's the worst altercation you have this month, you got off lightly.

VettiyaIruken · 27/06/2020 12:17

As others have said, it's just an unfortunate incident but not something you should beat yourself up about.

But since you already know you must show your I'd every time then as you approach the door, have it in your hand and hold it up.

justanotherneighinparadise · 27/06/2020 12:22

Who’s to say you haven’t got a hearing issue? It seems that currently there are no allowances for anything. If you don’t comply to a request immediately then expect anger. It’s a scary place out there at the moment.

gandalf456 · 27/06/2020 12:41

I know. I work in a shop. I can't hear customers at the best of times and now they have masks. They aren't to know I have hearing loss but I often miss things the first time. Last night, I got someone shout helllllloooo down the aisle, which isn't uucommon. Ihad actually heard her but thought she was talking to someone else. The problem is people just speak without addressing you first.

Your security guard should have spoken in a full sentence. Tbh, I think you're being too hard on yourself. I would have walked away thinking wtf is his problem. I would not have given your reaction much thought, had it been me

Bbq1 · 27/06/2020 12:42

What I do find odd is that if you're an nhs worker going into the hospital daily, wouldn't you know the protocol, for example mask, gel, show ID? Or does the security guard not ask you for ID every time? All the being flustered, stressed etc makes is sound like you're going into a strange environment not your workplace.

Lardlizard · 27/06/2020 12:46

So what, you only shouted at her because she shouted at you
Fair enough I’d say
Just try and forget about it, everyone else will have

Original poster
DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 12:46

@campion I may put a post on the hospital's question and answer forum explaining the situation and asking that we are spoken to in a more civil tone when we enter the building. I agree that if the request hadn't been barked at me in a one word order, I may have better understood what he was asking me to do. I did kind of panic as I had been lost in my own thoughts up until entering the building. Some people commenting here don't allow for human error do they? They must all be perfect!

OP posts:
gandalf456 · 27/06/2020 12:50

Good idea. Maybe add that the ppe and level of stress everyone is under isn't an ideal recipe for communication either and we should all be understanding and, above all, kind

Lardlizard · 27/06/2020 12:53

Dolly don’t do that as you will draw more attention to it and yourself !

Original poster
DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 12:54

@Bbq1 my workplace is a strange environment at the moment. Many of us are VERY stressed and flustered.. I'm sure you can appreciate that? I stated that I did put on a mask, I did gel my hands when (I thought) I was asked to (although this is not mandatory and I don't have to if I don't wish to) and I FORGOT to show my ID. This is called human error, not many of us are infallible, most of us forget stuff from time to time, especially when we're lost in thoughts about other shit that's going on, which was the case with me.

OP posts:
FishyMcFishyfingersFace · 27/06/2020 12:54

Surely if the guard had said 'ID' and you didn't show it he would have had to have followed you to ask for your ID otherwise he was allowing a person in without verifying who they were?

Him saying 'ID' was the other woman's interpretation of what was said, you interpreted it as 'hygiene', how are you to know which one of you was correct? You might have been.

Original poster
DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 12:55

@Lardlizard I can post there anonymously, as most people do. I probably won't though, I won't get time to LOL Currently sampling massive amounts of staff for antibody testing!

OP posts:
Original poster
DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 13:01

@FishyMcFishyfingersFace That's a very good point but I now assume that he was asking for my ID as that's the main thing the security are there for, to seperate staff from members of the public (we have seperate entrances now). That's not to say that the woman behind me 100% knew that for a fact. I was more upset at her than I was at the security guard, she was plain rude and actually raised her voice at me!

OP posts:
Bbq1 · 27/06/2020 13:03

[quote DollyDaydream70]@Bbq1 my workplace is a strange environment at the moment. Many of us are VERY stressed and flustered.. I'm sure you can appreciate that? I stated that I did put on a mask, I did gel my hands when (I thought) I was asked to (although this is not mandatory and I don't have to if I don't wish to) and I FORGOT to show my ID. This is called human error, not many of us are infallible, most of us forget stuff from time to time, especially when we're lost in thoughts about other shit that's going on, which was the case with me.[/quote]
Yes, faie enough I can see it probably is a more alien environment for you than usual but you are definitely overthinking the issue with the security guard. The woman who shouted at you will have forgotten about it. Honestly, it doesn't affect anyone except maybe the guard. Just say next time you see him something along the lines of "Sorry about not showing you my Id yesterday, I misheard you". Chances are he won't even remember.

Velvian · 27/06/2020 13:05

"Please can I see your..." would have avoided any confusion. The security guard was rude. It may be annoying to ask people, but that is his job and he should ask in a professional manner.

hedgehogger1 · 27/06/2020 13:05

I'd obsess about if I were you but, no one else will have even remembered it happening. Try not to dwell. Plus you didn't show your ID so the security guard was doing a crap job

WorraLiberty · 27/06/2020 13:06

Maybe she was also very stressed, very flustered and hot, bothered and distracted like you were?

And a member of staff not having their ID ready and slowing people down made her a tad snappy too?

I really think it's 6 of 1 and half a dozen of the other here. Just put it down to a bad day for all.

Original poster
DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 13:13

@WorraLiberty Agreed! It does help to come on here though, just to find out if people think you've been a horrible bitch. According to most here I'm just a normal human being who made a mistake, I'll honestly get through my weekend easier now knowing that it was a bit of everyone's fault, including my own.

OP posts:
LunchBoxPolice · 27/06/2020 13:13

I don’t know, but washing your hands 50 times a day sounds sore Sad

Original poster
DollyDaydream70 · 27/06/2020 13:14

@LunchBoxPolice my hands cope very well with the washing as they're used to it, I've been doing the job for 13 years :-) I use lots of hand cream!

OP posts:
TheresABearInThere · 27/06/2020 13:19

Maybe the security guard was stressed and flustered too.

earthyfire · 27/06/2020 13:21

I was in A&E the other day and I noticed NHS staff touching their phones between patients, handbags on desks, not enough hand washing going on and not all staff were wearing face masks.