What the most important thing a child should leave primary school with?

[maudavery]

Just asking cos I asked this in a teacher training interview recently and was disappointed with the answer given.

I would say the ability to make friends and negotiate social situations. Personally I hope my dc aren't taught by teachers who value academic achievement over that.

As the parent of a child at the end of year 4 who has no friends, that was part of my answer. Within the next 2 years, I think it is incredibly important that she gains friendships with her peer group, some self-confidence and a love of learning. I would also really like her to improve her spelling, handwriting and maths, but the friends and confidence will probably be much more important for her future happiness. I am worried about how my academically able child, who has never enjoyed school, doesn't have any friends and pre-lockdown would have said the best thing about school was helping in her sister's Reception class, will get on with returning to school after 6 months at home with seeing anyone else her age.

Well friends are important. I know kids will make new friends at secondary, uni, work etc but my own child left primary today and his friends of 9 years (they all went to the school nursery first) are very important to him and are the reason he enjoyed school so much. They all live close by and they've all played out together forever, it's made his childhood really and kids learn a lot from each other.

Saying that, yes probably not the best answer in the context of a job interview though.

I’m not sure that the answer was as horrifying as all that, OP.

Primary school should be a time of learning and establishing the basics and friendships and social skills are part of that.

Positive mental health - i say this as having 2 sen children whos mental health have severely been compromised due to primary school.

I don't agree that friends are the be all and end all of going to school. They can be socialised to conform to society's norms in a variety of settings. IMO they are at school to learn.

Yes. But that encompasses a lot of things.

If you do not have friends, are not included, then the chances of having a positive attitude towards school and learning is minimal.

A child who has lots of friends, loves school, is more likely to attend enthusiastically, involve herself in extra curricular activities and have a positive approach.

As I say I wouldn’t personally have given that answer but I don’t think it’s a shocking answer to have given either.

Experience of and hopefully ability to deal with bullies.
Friends is not the answer imv.

A belief in themselves.

The ability to recover from failure.

(not always easy when they are not always allowed to fail)

Lots of good answers here. I would also add that they should feel good about themselves.

Confidence and memories of a happy, supportive environment.

This is so important as a child in negotiating the rest of life and it can't be bought.

Friends is a rubbish answer imo

Their fucking sweatshirt!

As someone who has had 2 children leave primary school so far and who are so far apart in thier social skills (DS1 has ASD) I actually think friends are really really important. Yes he left primary school able to do GCSE level work, is a little brain box, loves to absorb knowledge, etc etc but he really does not do well in social situations.

DD however is a social butterfly, she is able to make friends wherever she goes and with whoever she meets be it a 3 year old, someone the same age as her, a teen or an adult. She’s clever but not normal clever.

I know out of the 2 of them who will probably do the best and be able to play the game that is office politics in order to network and progress on their career.

So o don’t think that ‘friends’ is that bad of an answer, I think unless you have experience of a child not having social skills you can’t begin to understand how important they actually are!!

But my answer would be ‘resilience’

Aspiration

I think people who don't value friends as an answer probably haven't watched DCs struggle with isolation or bullying.

Confidence- in their abilities, their strengths, talents and in their personal “self”, this will help them navigate their schooling life well.

Independence

Self esteem

@AnneOfCreamCables

They don't need to leave with long life friends, they do need to leave with the confidence to make more.

I agree with self-confidence and social skills.

As a child who struggled to make friends at school I don't think the answer is as bad as you think. In my case it indicated underlying dismal self confidence and weak social skills and those things have undoubtedly affected me through adulthood too. It's not as simple as just not having a couple of mates, it's about what's really going on. I'd argue the academic stuff is easier to catch up on too.