Do your children have to ask for a drink?

[ohoneohtwo]

Just musing really. I was having a bath earlier and the neighbours were in their garden. One of the kids asked if she could have a drink. She is 11.

I always provided mine with a drink until they were able to get their own independently, I'm guessing roughly 5 yo. They don't have to ask though. It never crossed don't mind to restrict drinks.

My teenager still asks for milk. (They help themselves to water.) We went through a phase of coming down to breakfast, or expecting milk to be there to make a white sauce or batter mix for dinner and it all having been drunk. We were just getting to the point where DC was aware how much milk was there, how much we might need etc and going to the shop themselves if needed. Then lockdown happened and swanning off to the shop every five minutes because someone has guzzled all the milk wasn't such a great option again so they have to ask again to make sure we don't run out!

I’m 40 and perfectly capable of getting my own drinks but sometimes I will ask DH if I can have one if he’s getting up / making one / I can’t be bothered and he looks amenable!

My kids ask if they can go to the toilet sometimes which is just a hangover from school, not because I don’t let them have a wee!

"All of my non-adult DC (11-16) have to ask to watch TV, go on their phones, go out, make a cup of tea etc"

Not sure about 16 but why is this controversial? Mine are 10 and 13 as I've said, and they certainly don't get unlimited screen time - otherwise they'd be on their phones or the telly all day. So they certainly have to ask for that, or rather we have restrictions already in place so they know when they can and when they can't.

I'm realistic that limiting screen time is going to get harder as they get older but absolutely while I still can I will - their behaviour when they have lots of time off screens is many many times better than when they are on screens all the time.

Similar with going out - again different with 16 but mine certainly would have to ask to go out - I need to know where they are, at least approximately!

Mine don't have to ask although they still sometime do.
I kind of wish they would ask. My nine year old has developed a taste for frothy coffee over lockdown and keeps using my favourite pods, they make a milkshake and use up all the milk or make 'a mix' using all the different squashes

I have a 5 and 2 year old but I just fill two bottles with water and leave it on the side in their playroom. I know if I don't they won't remember to ask and especially in this weather I'd rather it was just there than them having to fetch it.

I made my own dinner after I started secondary school - unless I wanted my mum to on occasion, in which case I asked her 'what can I have?'.

We both knew what that meant

My nine year old has developed a taste for frothy coffee over lockdown and keeps using my favourite pods, they make a milkshake and use up all the milk or make 'a mix' using all the different squashes

I remember being shown actual witchcraft by my friend as a child where she made what I now know as a tequila sunrise (sans the tequila, obviously) with ribena in orange squash. We went through sooo much cordial in our house after that!

@LonginesPrime mine love a mocktail!

Soft drinks or diluting juice, yeah. Water or a hot cuppa, no. They also have to ask for snacks. It's normally a yes but constant unrestricted access to snacks whether it's crisps, sweets or fruit would result in ny hard work creating nutritious home cooked meals going to waste.

No, they help themselves. However, my 10 year old does ask some random things sometimes, to which the answer is 'of course, why would need to ask?'. Maybe it's a habit from being at school? Maybe she was in the middle of school work?

They only have water freely though. They do always ask if they want juice or squash.

Sugar free squash, water, ice or milk help themselves but tea or hot chocolate have to ask as not allowed to touch kettle as learning difficulty. Only fizzy drinks at Xmas, birthday or treat like at cinema as weak enamel on teeth.

Water or diluting juice they don't have to ask. Anything else they do. Normally milk is in the 'help yourself' category, but the 4 year old has to ask as she has to have almond or oat milk. The 10 & 6 year olds have started asking for milk as well, which is no big problem.

They also have to ask for snacks or food that's outside their snack boxes (everyone in the house has a snackbox they can help themselves too at any time). That was brought in after the 10 yo developed a love for tangerines that lead to him scoffing them like I'd scoff a big bag of crisps and a having a very sore tummy.

I seriously can't imagine a 16 yo just being given the privilege of being able to make themselves a cuppa I would expect them from 13/14 to stick the kettle on when they fancy and ask if anyone else wanted one. It would seem very controlling to expect a 15/16 yo to ask. Most kids of that age will be at home on their own for significant amounts of time so need to be a bit self sufficient.

Mine do make their own lunch when they fancy at the moment as they are at home all day doing school work. They don't ask as such but will check what we have in and what they are allowed to use up. If they want extra snacks they usually ask just to double check if dinner isn't too soon.

mine Are too little to make their own but when they can they will as long as they offer to make some for everyone else like I do

@ThisIsGonnaHurt your children sound really well mannered and considerate. ❤️

@bodgedboxdye They can be, like with all teens not with everything of course though!!

Yes but only because he can't reach the fridge yet.Ds is 6

My six year old can’t really reach the kitchen tap or the fridge beyond the bottom shelf so mostly we still make him drinks. Only thing he can confidently reach is the fridge door water dispenser but he doesn’t always want freezing cold water.

God no

How often does it happen? It could be a habit from school. DD still asks sometimes if she can have a drink or if she can go to the toilet.