How do we introduce a person in to our household?

[JumpingJoey]

What are rules? Is it a complete no-go? My daughter’s boyfriend is prepared to move households permanently to ours. Does he self isolate in our spare room (with en-suite) for 7 or 14 days? Can we get a test for him after a few days? What’s the incubation period? His large family are going back to work and so the best time for him to come here would be in the next few days.

Dd and him used to see each other nearly every day and have only seen each other 4 times at a distance. We run our own business so can’t afford to be sick.

Dd is getting more depressed. We have enough room and are happy feeding him and him living with us. They are 19 and 20.

Is there anyway to do this?

I’d be more concerned about unplanned pregnancies than Covid-19 to be honest!

They’ve shared a room for a while, before and during university. We are fine with that (I was living with Dh at 18).

Obviously not shared a room since mid-March though.

Why not just ask him to get tested? Results come back in 48 hours. If it's negative then just move him in.

@Elieza

I’d be more concerned about unplanned pregnancies than Covid-19 to be honest!

Wow that is so judgemental 🤦🏼‍♀️ She never asked you for an opinion on the sex life of her AGE CONSENT daughter 🙄

I think you are being very sensible OP with trying to do the move correctly and I hope it all goes well.

Where do you live a what does he do for a living? I’d assess the risk and then decide from there.

You just invite him in, there is no requirement for anything else, you may choose more isolation for your own piece of mind, but unless your family would be particularly at risk, it's very unlikely that he has the virus at the moment, so I wouldn't personally see anything worthwhile.

Obviously once he's in the household, he can't join others, but it seems you know that.

@TickledOnion

Why not just ask him to get tested? Results come back in 48 hours. If it's negative then just move him in.

He could contract it within that 48 hours though whilst waiting for his results.

If he's going to move in, it makes sense that he should get tested then self isolate in your spare room until results come through.

That would be fine but there are a few problems with that theoretically:
He could get a false result. We have a relative who is pretty ill still and she has tested negative twice (her GP says ignore the results - and told her she has it).
I don’t know if he catches it at the centre/ just before how long it takes before you show symptoms.
My husband is in a vulnerable category.
We thought if he had a test and then isolated at his house until he got the result and then if negative come to finish off 7 days isolation here to be safe? Or should it be 14?

Meanwhile a couple of Dds friends who have not being socially distancing have been tested positive! Her and her boyfriend have been so good but we need to minimise the risk and also work out if we are allowed to do this. It’s as clear as mud but I believe if we agree to permanently have him here for as long as this lasts it’s ok for him to change??

Cross posted with you Eeples!

I wish there was Government guidance on this. It really difficult.

The R rate is low here but going to be shooting up locally in the next few days knowing the people who have just tested positive.

I would just do it. I think it is low risk, and very low risk that you would get ill from it.

Have you considered what is best for your daughter in all this?

Government guidance is patchy in this. Especially now single people can move in to a support bubble, you'd think the advice would be clearer and more prescriptive.

Is he working from home and limiting his contact with other people? Do the family he lives with also work at home?

If so, I'd do 7 days in your spare room, then he can join in with the family.

What’s best for my daughter is for him to be here. It’s the practicalities. And legalities.

They have been together 3 years.

I'd follow the guidance for the support bubble as that is the closest to your circumstances. Following that I think he can just move in but I'd perhaps be more hot on hand hygiene initially.

He is at college (has to go in for the first time for one day next week). His parents work at a medical centre (admin) and a transport worker. They have started to go back part-time.

Does your DD have an ensuite too? If not I'd be tempted to move her and the bf into the spare room so that they can be semi self contained if the bf is mixing with others.

No she doesn’t have an en-suite.
Ah it’s difficult. If Dh was to get it as bad as his relative, our business could be at serious risk.
Also we have neighbours that love to gossip so don’t want to have police round saying we have done the wrong thing. And morally I wouldn’t feel right either.
But as pp said, there’s not really any guidance on this situation.

My Dd has just showed me that I and her are now also getting tracked on our iPhones for COVID-19 exposure! Went into settings then privacy then health and it’s there. Strangely Dh hasn’t - big brother is watching this thread!

Dont worry about the covid tracker on your phone, more details here: www.zdnet.com/article/no-no-one-has-secretly-installed-a-covid-19-tracker-onto-your-smartphone/ or Google covid tracker on iPhone.

Focus on building her self esteem and mental health maybe and not moving in the boyfriend to solve it. Her dependency on another person for her happiness is not healthy.

Living together is a huge step and it is in the family home, which brings its own complexities. Think hard.

Stop worrying about Covid I would and do what’s right for your family / dd

How vulnerable is your husband? Will the boyfriend be going to college regularly?