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Original poster

Relationship split. Worried about 2 seperate school runs September.

41 replies

Scabberdikravern · 20/06/2020 10:31

I'll have kids at 3 different schools.

Eldest is fine. 15 walks himself.

But then I have Yr 7 at different High school to DS1 and primary 7 year old.

Plan was for DP and I to walk a smaller child each. Neither of us drive.

Now he's moving to his mums property a good 5 miles away.

How am I going to drop off and collect them both.

DD can't walk on her own, she's a very young 11 and won't even go shops on her own.

Am panicking

OP posts:
Thisismytimetoshine · 20/06/2020 10:34

Practice over the summer with your dd. The only Year 7's who are accompanied to school by their parents are driven there for convenience, not because they can't travel alone.
She needs to be able to do this.

sleepismysuperpower1 · 20/06/2020 10:35

is there a public bus that goes near your dd's school, OP? You might find that other pupils from your area that go to her school are getting the bus that way also, so she wouldn't be alone.

xyzandabc · 20/06/2020 10:42

You have 3 months to work on your DDs independence. It's pretty rare for secondary school kids to be walked to school by their parents after the 1st day of yr7.

Walk the route with her lots, talk about any alternative routes, she knows she's 5/10 mins from home/school when she passes X. Does she have any local friends she could walk with, meet up with in the summer to practise the walk?

Send her on little errands on her own, post a letter at your nearest postbox. Drop a note or card in to a neighbour. Gradually work up to further distances. She could talk to you on the phone the whole way there and back the 1st few times.

What worries her about going to a shop on her own? Is it the actual walk or is it what to do inside the shop? How to talk to adults, how to do the actual paying, is she confident with money? My now yr8 admitted to me recently she remembers being petrified of an adult talking to her in a shop incase she didn't understand the question, or added up wrong and didn't have enough money.

She's got a bus to school everyday since the start of yr7 and the difference in her independence even in the 1st few weeks was amazing.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

7 year olds Families Secondary education
PotteringAlong · 20/06/2020 10:42

I agree. There is no reason a year 7 child cannot get themselves to school. You’ve got 11 weeks to practice.

Original poster
Scabberdikravern · 20/06/2020 10:43

I'm sorry but we live in an awful area.

DS1 has been mugged 3 times in the last 2 years.
She's not walking alone.

And all her friends mums are dropping them off a high school year 7. I've spoken to them.

Unfortunately none live near us or they're going to different schools.

OP posts:
Original poster
Scabberdikravern · 20/06/2020 10:44

My eldest was walked to school the whole of year 7. Most of his mates were or dropped off in car

OP posts:
xyzandabc · 20/06/2020 10:44

Also you panicking will be feeding in to her feeling that it's something she can't do and should be scared of. Stop panicking and calmly work on positive solutions. She can do this and so can you.

PotteringAlong · 20/06/2020 10:45

Then you pay for before and after school club for your primary aged child.

Thisismytimetoshine · 20/06/2020 10:45

You live in an area where it's unsafe for kids to walk to school alone?

sleepismysuperpower1 · 20/06/2020 10:51

as PP said, is there a before school club your primary dc could join?

FedUpAtHomeTroels · 20/06/2020 10:51

Breakfast club for the youngest?
Do the two younger get our same time? Here they don't, high school is a bit earlier and the bus drops off as the little ones are getting out.

okiedokieme · 20/06/2020 10:51

At 11 she can take herself unless there's sn. My DD's took themselves to school from 8, from 10 they took the city bus. You need to start the process now of getting her ready

okiedokieme · 20/06/2020 10:52

Inner city area!

CommunistLegoBloc · 20/06/2020 10:53

I think either you use a breakfast club for one child or you ask if any parents can walk your 7 year old. Presumably you'll have local friends at that school?

rayoflightboy · 20/06/2020 10:54

Can she not walk part of the way with the oldest DC.

blahblahblah2000 · 20/06/2020 11:13

Is the high school library open before school? Or have a drop in room? There may be the option to drop her earlier to school if they don’t have before school care.

Cathysaf · 20/06/2020 11:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Howmanysleepsnow · 20/06/2020 11:18

What time does the secondary open? I have 2 at different secondaries, 1 starts at 8.45, the other 8.50 but both schools are open from 8 with free breakfast for all pupils/ newspapers/ board games (I think it’s to encourage punctuality/ make sure pupils are fed!). DD in particular loves to get in early to have breakfast and a catch up with friends before school.

Howmanysleepsnow · 20/06/2020 11:19

Cross post!

SoloMummy · 20/06/2020 11:33

Well if you chose different schools for child 1 and 2,this was always going to be an issue at some point.

Initially, ex will have to come and drop I'd say. Or you use breakfast club for one of them to allow time to drop other. Or you get the 11 yo walking as is reasonable, even in a poor area.

dalrympy · 20/06/2020 11:36

You might be surprised at how quickly your yr 7 becomes more competent. It seems to happen as part of the move up to high school.

I don't see a choice! Is there a reason your yr 7 is going to a different school from your older DC?

Thisismytimetoshine · 20/06/2020 11:44

You haven't answered whether the high school has a breakfast club, op? If they have and you're determined your dd can't travel alone, you'll have to take both children to the high school early and drop off the younger one afterwards.
Or, your oh comes over in the mornings and accompanies one of them.
There really aren't any other options.

What do other people in your area do? Why do you live in such Apache territory? Your oh managed to get out...
Are all high school children really accompanied by their parents?!

DelphiniumBlue · 20/06/2020 11:47

Why is this all your problem? Is DPs lack of parenting the reason you sp!it up?
Ideally he would be shouldering half this issue.
If he won't, then you've got some tough decisions ahead. You can train DD to get to school by herself, arrange lifts with someone, take her in yourself but early, put her in the same school as older brother , or learn to drive. That won't happen by September though, so you'll need to look at other options.

Original poster
Scabberdikravern · 20/06/2020 12:38

Schools are all opposite directions literally 😂

Theres a 30 min difference in ooening and closing times.

I would tey and do a crash course and get a banger but theres no lessons due to covid :(

I might get them bikes and see if i can do the journey

And busses on rainy days?

Its all very well saying just letbher go alone but i was molested on thebway to school at 12 years old. I was dragged into an allet.

Im not letting her walk alone until she isnolder.

Dd doenst knownthis of course. Her and all her friends are just naturally young minded.

They dont go play in the streets and stuff. Its just not that typenof area unlessnyoure tough as nails kinda kids. Andnthey arent.

OP posts:
Original poster
Scabberdikravern · 20/06/2020 12:39

I supposeni could have exp to do picknups.

He would never gwtbup early enough to do mornings.

Yes he is a lazy shite.

OP posts: