Thread 3 shielding chat

[AuntieSocia1]

I hope this unimaginative thread title doesn't put off all the amazing posters from this group!

As we transition into this new phase things could get interesting....

Waves to lurkers

@OrganTransplant123 ha ha yes I know. I would never have run a marathon with full kidney function, let alone without!! There is also a good book on amazon called Staying Alive by Jan and Alan Cooper. It is a collection of short stories about kidney stuff. I turn to it every month when my bloods are that bit worse and it keeps me going and makes me feel less alone.
Sorry you are going through this.

Good luck everyone as the world opens up today, at least the weather is crap so we don’t feel too far left behind!!

@Madhairday yes I feel a bit like that too but a couple of things have helped. Doing what I can to keep safe while still trying to have a life. I went to a shop the other day, a shop!! I kept my distance, sanitised my hands and didn’t touch my face, but also enjoyed the freedom to pick my own bits.
I also have a lot of faith that the universe will provide for me whatever it will provide and that so much of it is out of my control. It sounds cheesy but it helps me to understand that some stuff is just out of my hands.
I hope you get that hug!!

The DCs are off to stay with their dad today, first time seeing him since feb half term. Bit nervous, especially as he's taking them the other side of the border (the English side) as it was easier to guarantee he could make a air b&b booking. Theyre the first clients since March, so I know they're being extra careful cause of me (Eg their shopping for the week has been delivered here, and they've been staying in for the last two weeks, and made sure to get a negative CV test a few days ago just to be as sure as possible) but I'm still anxious. Always am when the children are away though, so hopefully it's no worse than normal.

Just got a call from the hospital. Have to go in (again) today for a COVID test prior to operation. Honestly the only place I've been is the bloody hospital and that's the one place I'm likely to catch it. Hate having to go there.

Also looked at the menu and it looks like their food is based around the ridiculous nhs livewell diet which has about the same number of carbs per meal, that I have in a week. So I'll have to take in a goody box of meat and cheese and hope they have a patient fridge on the ward. At least they have salad .

Starting to get nervous now. Hate needles and surgery and I seem to have had more of that in my life than anything else.

My supervisor has said to take the whole shift off, I was just going to have a few days, but might as well take advantage of the offer. I don't get brownie points for struggling.

Baby shark, take some babybels (don't need the fridge) and jars of olives etc - I've done low carb hospital stays too I also took herbal tea and uht almond milk, so I wasn't adding fluid carbs from the many teas and coffees

It’s a bit of a myth that babybells don’t need to kept in a fridge they do. But they will be fine for several hours.

@Madhairday haven't had that advice as it wasn't in the letters here, but I am spending more time back at home and have been going in the house rather than just sitting in the garden. It's nice. Not sleeping there or going back every day just yet, but am going to gradually increase the time I spend there between now and when shielding ends on August 16th.

Are you in Scotland, @Is2020OverYet? Sorry you've got to wait longer. There's some confusion even over the letter in England with it being interpreted differently. I take 'you can stop social distancing at home from 6th July' to mean we can be back in the same rooms for longer, hug one another etc, I may be wrong though but damn it's good!

I'm in Wales. We've had some changes, we're allowed to bubble for example from tomorrow, but definitely still meant to be social distancing.

I'm expected back at work in September (in a school). I want to go back, but I also don't want to risk my health. I don't know what to do.

Hi all checking in. My mental health has been really taking a downward spiral. It's confusing to me that it's at its worst when things are slowly getting back to 'normal' I'm finding this transition period really hard.

I am going to take things slowly and build up. Thoughts of a second wave are all consuming at times and just the unknown.

In slightly cheerier news I have a chicken roaring in the over. Something about Sunday Lunch is always very calming to me.

Hope everyone has a nice Sunday x

Goodness I promise it's roasting

I made some pear and ginger keto muffins to take in with me. They last ages just in a plastic box.

Anyway I had the COVID test yesterday and it was the one that goes ALL the way down your nose. F-me it bloody stung! I'll only hear back if it's positive.

Minor problem with shielding: I do a weekly meal plan and shop based on my recipes. All good, except I have a mango & avocado salad on Monday and I forgot the flipping avocado and no e of us can go out to get one. So I have a mango that will be hanging around now. I can only really have it as part of a salad as it has so much sugar in. I'll have to chop it up and donate it to ds/dh. Or try something with mango, pepper and spinach. Silly things like this really seem big when you can't just pop out.

DS has said he's going to stay with his brother from Tuesday. Not really thinking, I said; What if I die! It just popped out. I didn't mean to guilt him. Ulp.

Hello, everyone. I’m still here reading most days but I’ve not got much to say really. This long spell of weirdness is playing havoc with my mental health though I feel a bit brighter today. I know others are similarly afflicted.

@AuntieSocia1, I hope you feel better soon too.

@OrganTransplant123, I was sorry to read about your kidney function being so poor. I hope it improves and/or the treatment isn’t too awful. It must be a scary prospect to possibly have to go through another transplant especially as your liver is doing so well after so long.

@MarieVanGoethem, I’m sorry you’re having so many problems. I hope something can be done to ease at least some of your difficulties.

@Madhairday, I’m not in England either (Scotland) but I’ve made a few little changes, relaxations of the guidance. I think I said already that for the last week I’ve been going in the sitting room in the evening to watch a DVD. It’s quite a big room fortunately so I don’t sit close by anyone else. Last night I reached the end of Call the Midwife Season 9, so I’m on the lookout for something else now. I’ve also been eating some meals with the family. I sit at the far end of the table making sure nobody’s directly opposite me and I leave the room quite soon after finishing eating. A week or so ago I got a spontaneous hug from DH - that was quite nice though weird. He was behind me in the kitchen, put his arms round me and kissed the back of my head.

From the outset I’ve been giving youngest DS a goodnight hug if he asks for one. I set some ground rules of no slobbery kisses on the face! He’s on the autism spectrum and it felt like it was too hard on him to deny hugs altogether. He’s not particularly tactile but is very attached to me and we’d got into the habit of goodnight hugs - occasionally he asks for hugs at other times, usually if something’s upset him so it’s important for him.

The continued hugging of DS leaves me with a dilemma when his two absent brothers come back here. All along we’ve said whenever they come here they’ll need to quarantine for a week or a fortnight - I think 2 weeks might be really hard. They’ll be able to use 2 rooms and a bathroom in the attic. We’re lucky to have space and more than one bathroom. They won’t be able to hug me till after ‘quarantine’. However that would mean youngest son either not hugging me or not hugging them for that time. I’m concerned he’s a bit too compulsive to be able to stick with that. I’m hoping for some good weather (ha bloody ha, this is Scotland) after they get here so we can use the garden whilst physically distancing. Somewhat paradoxically I’d have to increase my SD till we are sure they haven’t got covid. It just feels a waste getting this far with none of us catching it then screwing it up when restrictions are being more relaxed generally. Anyway we haven’t got a definite plan as yet. For the two who are away, now ds1 is off shielding, their lives are opening up a bit. They’ve been in friends’ gardens a couple of times. DS3 took a long walk (Paisley to south side of Glasgow) to meet a friend in his garden. He got trains back as he was knackered - 7 miles or so. Coming back here might well cramp their style a bit. I think in Scotland non-essential travel over 5 miles from home is permitted now or soon, except in certain postcodes in Dumfries and Galloway where they’ve got a spike in cases? So hopefully I’ll get to see the boys soon.

@Babysharkdoodoodood, is it this week you’re having your ghastly procedure under GA? I hope it goes okay for you. The covid test sounds horrid too. I hope you hear nothing then so you can get this procedure done. I hope too your mango can be used - I’m not mad about the texture of mango, like the flavour though especially in ice cream!

@Babysharkdoodoodood I totally understand your mango problem. I have my Tesco delivery every Monday and plan meals for the week based around what I've ordered. Then they sub something integral to the meal plan for something wholly unsuitable! I get really upset about it sometimes, I just feel totally powerless because I can't just nip to the shop and buy a replacement.

Hi all, I just want to vent a little. I have mentioned briefly that my DD hasn't seen her dad since lockdown. It is actually before lockdown due to various reasons. I explained on the thread that I don't trust her dad to stay safe, he is supposed to be shielding. My DP is also shielding. I have watched DD find it so hard, I have felt guilty for not trusting her dad, her dad has been angry and throwing all sorts of conspiracies our way! Apparently Covid doesn't even exist. < that is why I couldn't trust him!
Anyway, couple of weeks ago he was in hospital due to not dialysing enough (he misses sessions...this upsets DD)
Well today was arranged, he was going to come and park up on the drive to chat to her. 1st time in 5 months. Today is my DPs bday...this is relevant as he always lets her down on special days - bdays, xmas, days out.
Guess what! His phone has been off all day, he is fine because he emailed me a link to something this morning. Did he show up? Nope!!! After all of what DD has gone through! I don't even know why I am posting here, I think cos all who are shielding know how bloody hard it is for adults and kids! I am fuming!

Hi everyone. Much like @UnholyStramash I have been reading but havent had much to say. Its my birthday today. DH and the kids got me a little cake and we had a tea party just ourselves. Was really sweet!

Our tesco shop is due tomorrow at some point aswell and I totally understand tthe issues with substitutes. I appreciate that they try to help by bringing something rather than nothing but when you meal plan precisely as we do it can lead to some unusual dinners and combinations. A few weeks ago they sent caster sugar instead of granulated and DC2 was not impressed with the change in the morning on his cornflakes! Not as bad as sending tinned tomatoes instead of fresh - tinned were a bit weird in a salad.

Still no further forward with DC2 and school for september. Hoping to hear something in the next few weeks. Starting to panic as I dont even know what uniform to buy. I always buy the uniforms over a few weeks in July to spread the cost. I worry I am going to find out about his school about a week before he starts and will then be dashing around like crazy trying to get him sorted. It is such a crazy time! Of course schools going back is a headache in itself. I dont know how it is going to work especially in special schools. DC2 just doesnt understand social distancing and for the extra care he needs wouldnt be possible from a distance anyway. But even thinking of mainstream schools when the youngest kids fall and scape their knees sometimes they need a smile and reassurance from their teachers or classroom assistant that just isnt possible behind a mask from a distance. I think it will be quite scary and daunting. It would probably be easier in secondary schools but primary schools? They just arent set up like that with all pupils sitting facing a teacher glued to the spot at the front of the class. I dont have any answers but I know what wont work.

@Babysharkdoodoodood good luck with the op. I have had the covid test done twice (they lost the first one!) and I can definitely agree it is not pleasant. I think it has a lot to do with the technique of the person doing it though. My first wasnt pleasant but wasnt too bad. The second time it was a different nurse who showed no mercy and really hurt me. She ended up giving me a nosebleed she was so rough! She later admitted she hadn't done many and wanted the practice - I can tell you she needed it but I wouldnt want to be one of her victims I mean volunteers!

Hello I'm still here. I'm feeling it too...the expectation that it is all normal. We got an invitation to a beach picnic from a group of friends and it just feels too much, too soon. Crikey, it's it from tomorrow that were allowed to see people in our garden. But does anyone else get it? Of course not. I need to go slowly.

I love the "roaring chicken" though!

Happy birthday@outnumberedwoman, it may not have been the birthday you wished for but you won't forget it. Don't worry about social distancing at primary, our school recognise it's impossible with younger children, staff don't wear masks either.

Good luck with your operation @Babysharkdoodoodood and the mango problem!

@idroppedthescrewinthetuna, I'm sorry your DD was let down again today, all you can do is be there for her, when she's older she'll understand what her father was really like.

@UnholyStramash, I'm glad you're getting hugs with your youngest ds, if your boys are anything like mine they'll be used to things being different between the older ones and the youngest, especially where special needs are concerned. Hopefully it won't be too long before you can hug them all.

Happy belated birthday @outnumberedwoman!

@Idroppedthescrewinthetuna I'm so sorry she was let down, you must have the rage! I hope you managed to have as good a day as possible for your DP birthday despite the waste of space ex letting you down.

I'm thinking coming out of this is going to be harder than going into it. We did our nature reserve walk and it was fin, hardly anyone there, very respectful and there was a beer garden at the end ;) I also sat in one of my best friends gardens on Friday afternoon, just the two of us, we each prepped our own food, took our own drinks and glasses etc.

My next step is lunch in a very quiet hotel garden, the staff are going to set me up an isolated table and have spent some time on the phone going over how they are adapting service etc, we will stay the night too but the rooms are lots of individual cabins, private gardens, no communal areas. The rooms are deep cleaned and then fogged.

What I'm really not ready for is people, shops, pubs, restaurants etc. 6 in the garden feels overwhelming if people are drinking etc, I can't imagine setting foot in a supermarket, or sit inside a pub. I'm washing my hands if I touch the front door handle, no way can I bear to be with people yet.

I've been really boring the last week or so, just doing the accounts and tax returns, hopefully they will be finished by the end of the week (or my accountant may cry) but its so bloody hard to focus.

Sending much unmumsnetty love x

Happy birthday for yesterday @outnumberedwoman

All the very best for your op tomorrow @Babysharkdoodoodood

I completely agree with you @Redcherries coming out of this feels so much harder than going into it. I have been for a couple of walks around the block with DH but by the end I am practically dragging him home! We look like that advert on the telly for the holiday company where all you can see is someone's hand being pulled along

We consulted the union about my DH return to work and they said he'd need an individual risk assessment as I am still shielding and they do seem to be taking that seriously as he is still working at home till that can be done and the union have checked it.

Sometimes I do wonder if we will every get back to having anything like a normal life but to take my mind off it I am going to scrub my windows! Living it up in lockdown!

Have a good Monday everyone

Thanks for the good wishes about the operation

I'm not good at remembering who says what unless I do a million posts replying to everyone individually

But good luck to those moving out of shielding (gently does it) and hopefully things will get better soon, although I do think we've been hung out to dry, and forgotten.

In other news, spoke to gp about my Dexa scan. Good news is my hips and femurs are fine. Bad news is my lumbar region isn't. The only thing saving me from phosphate treatment is that I'm under the dental hospital for my crappy gums. And further excellent news is they got in touch with my oncologist and they're cutting me short on the exemestane (for breast cancer reoccurrence prevention) and I only have until January'21 not '23 as originally planned. So hopefully I can get my weight back under control and my bones will stop thinning And stop all the other million and one pills I take to reduce the side effects.

I am so looking forward to a nice walk soon, hopefully surgery will sort out the bladder issues so I can roam free again. Some lovely woods and parks nearby, but no open loos and weather is picking up again.

I feel so sorry for those of you with shielding children. I would honestly lose my marbles if mine were still small especially as they're both Aspies/adhd/odd.

Good luck @babyshark. Keep us posted

Happy belated birthday @outnumberedwoman

Hope it all goes well (@Babysharkdoodoodood*