Dealing with an injury that was due to another's negligence.

[AVeryBitterLemon]

No I don't work for a law firm, but I am someone who was injured in a workplace accident about 15 years ago. The injury doesn't sound especially terrible, but it required surgery, months of therapy to regain any movement as it resulted in nerve damage. I've had 15 years of Chronic pain and impairment to my arm that means that I've lost a lot of strength in it and I'm sometimes unable to use it much and sometimes I can't use it at all. It's getting worse, and it's affecting my sleep, my already poor mental health and I'm finding myself becoming very angry about it, even though I actually still have fond memories of my employers and feel no hate towards them, but I'm frustrated. I have other disabilities including damage to my other arm(not related) so when they both go it's "fun".

I know that I'm lucky compared to many as I wasn't left with more severe injuries and I can use my arm some of the time, also if it'd happened minutes before I'd have been killed, but the pain can be so severe that I've considered begging for amputation.

I know that there's little I can do now, but has anyone else experienced anger/frustration over an injury that was caused by someone else?

How was it caused by someone else?

It was caused by a faulty piece of equipment that they'd failed to maintain.

And said faulty piece of equipment broke and fell on me.

Is your employer still trading?

Did you not claim against them?

They are. They're a relatively small business. I did sue them at the time, and got some money, but I had no idea at the time that this would be with me for the rest of my life. I don't want more money. I don't care about that. I'm just so bloody frustrated that I've been left like this,and I'm needing more and more help as time goes on.

I'm just wondering how others deal with it. Part of me wants to write a letter to them, but I don't think that'd be fair. Perhaps counselling would help.

It was 15 years ago, the statute of limitations for workplace injury is 3 years.
Besides you did sue for compensation at the time
What do you expect from them now?

I don't expect anything. I'm just wondering how other people deal with their feelings. Money won't make this any better. At the time it helped because a family member lost a lot of money because they had to take a lot of time off to help me at home and assist with therapy sessions.I guess I'd just like my function back, and not to be in chronic pain and needing help for basic tasks but that obviously isn't going to happen.

I'm just wondering when others stopped feeling bitter? I don't feel bitter most of the time but it's getting worse and I've developed a new problem with it so I'm feeling rather resentful.

That's a bit of a harsh reply. OP isn't whining about wanting more compo, she wants help dealing with her feelings.

Sorry this happened to you and I hope you are able to come to terms with your injury.

Sorry if I sounded harsh. Maybe counselling would help you? Writing to the company really, really wouldn't.

I'd definitely try some counselling. There are psychologists as well who deal with pain management, maybe someone like that could help. I understand you're not posting because you want more money or harbour ill-feeling towards the company, it's just the frustration/anger at the injury that wasn't caused by something you did. I think they only way to deal with it would be through some form of counselling.

I know it was probably an off the cuff remark about the amputation but I would seriously advise against that to try and get rid of the pain. I have a family member who had an injury decades ago and was still suffering pain from it, he ended up having the limb amputated because of an infection but still gets phantom pain even though the limb is no longer there, he's absolutely gutted.

I genuinely have considered amputation because at times it is utterly useless and the pain can be so severe that having a literal feather brushed against it would be intolerable but I have never asked my Dr about it because of the fear of complications and phantom pain.

I can empathise. I received life changing injuries in an incident that wasn't my fault. I refuse to call it an accident as that implies it was unavoidable. The person that caused it was convicted but got away with little more than a slap on the wrist as they managed to convince the magistrates that they were a changed person full of remorse. Well they may be changed, but not as much as I am. I try not to let bitterness consume me, but sometimes that is very difficult, as like you OP, I am in almost continuous pain. And now to put the tin hat on it my employers are trying to get rid of me because of my sickness record - all directly related to the injuries sustained in the incident. The other person lives locally and I hear that they were back to living their life basically as if nothing happened before I was even out of hospital. The idea that "the system" looks after you if you are the innocent party is a load of rubbish. I've been let down at every turn by the people who are allegedly "on my side". I could write pages about my experiences but I won't because its too depressing and I bet people wouldn't believe half of it anyway. I probably wouldn't if it hadn't happened to me.
But I can understand your feelings and you are not alone. It is really hard to move on when you have daily reminders of what happened. I'm better if I can keep busy and occupy my mind. Lockdown hasn't helped.

Oh, and like you I have seriously considered asking for an amputation but from what I have read the chances of phantom pain are extremely high so it would be out of the frying pan into the fire. And I do have some function in my affected limb, albeit significantly reduced so on balance I'm probably better off keeping it.
for you. I think it is hard for people to understand if they haven't been there. People just think you are crazy if you talk about wanting limbs cut off but having experienced being kept awake by neuropathic pain night after night for years I can understand that desire, even though I know its logically not the answer and I'd never do it.

I'm so sorry to hear about everything that you've suffered and are still suffering, MrsAvocet. The injury is terrible enough without being let down by the Justice system like that. You deserved better and I'm sorry that your suffering was dismissed like that and that others have let you down too. Thank you for your kind words. It means a lot.

I am very sorry. I hope you can find some peace of mind and some solutions for pains.

Thank you to everyone else for your kind words too. Just talking about it makes me feel a little better. I'll definitely look into counselling. A psychologist who specialises in pain management sounds perfect. I will see if I can find one. I'll return to my Doctor too. I've been told that there's nothing more that can be done, but as it's getting even worse and I've developed a new problem with it, it's worth trying again.

Thank you AVeryBitterLemon
I oscillate between relative acceptance and extreme anger depending on what is going on. I have had counselling which has helped to a degree but I don't think it is possible to ever be totally ok with things because no matter how you look at it it isn't fair.
I am feeling upset today as I've just had a particularly upsetting conversation with my line manager which brings the injustice home again.
My legal case drags on and on. There have been multiple errors by many people and I am yet to receive a penny in compensation. Someone will no doubt come along and say "it shouldn't be about the money" and no, it won't make me better, but I would at least like my lost earnings, reduced pension contributions, expenses due to travel for the multiple operations etc reimbursing. Its easy to say "money won't help" when its not you that's hundreds of thousands of pounds out of pocket. We have taken a huge financial hit and my family's lives have been turned upside down.
From the outside I probably now look like I am leading a relatively normal life, but it is not the same life as it was before the incident and it never will be again.
Sorry, I said I wasn't going to rant on but today is definitely not a good one and whilst I don't wish the same on anyone at all, its quite nice to find someone who "gets it". I know its not healthy to still be brooding on things after all this time but I don't thing its possible to stop completely. Sorry for hijacking your thread.

MrsAvocet Please feel free to rant as much as you like. I started this thread because I wanted to hear from other people. And if anyone deserves a rant, it's you.

I hope that one day you get some compensation. You deserve that and so much more.

I am so sorry OP.
I was injured as a result of negligence some years ago.
I posted on mn and was roundly told off for even considering legal action.
My gp advised me to sue. It took 3 years and I did get some compensation. The medical examiner was useless and advised that my injury would resolve in about 6 months.
5 years later I still have pain.
It is awful and I am so sorry for your situation.

Oh yes endoftheline I have found people very judgemental whenever compensation is mentioned! I am sorry to hear you have had the same experience.
I have directly lost a great deal of income due to sickness absence, my career progression has stalled due to my health, I've had to reduce my hours, probably permanently, and the impact on my pension is substantial. That's before you even get on to the money I have spent on private physio, counselling etc, travel to hospitals hours away from home for specialist treatment, home adaptations and help for the many months I couldn't so much as dress myself. And yet people tell me "money won't help you" and even "its because of people like you that insurance premiums are so high, you should be ashamed". Well pardon me, but a)yes, getting my money back bloody well would help me and b)no, insurance premiums are so high because of arseholes who nearly kill people and I will not feel ashamed.

Endofthelinefinally I'm so sorry for what you've suffered. I hate the attitude that wanting compensation is wrong. Yes there are people who take the piss, but if people have through no fault of their own, suffered financially, sustained a severe and/or life changing injury that leaves them with impairment or pain for any length of time then why shouldn't they be compensated? It doesn't begin to make up for the injury suffered, I'd sooner get rid of this pain and disability than be a millionaire, but it does help somewhat when you've lost money, or quality of life.

Far worse things have happened to me since then, but it doesn't help.
Just got to keep going.
I am sorry you are suffering.
It is so easy to get depressed.

AVeryBitterLemon

I’ve never been in your position but I think I’d feel the way you do.

I’d definitely look in to counselling or some other therapy.

My friend lost a limb at work due to an electric shock. They are incredibly lucky to be alive as if it would have reached their heart and not damaged the limb so much - they would be dead. But some days they don’t feel lucky. Some days they struggle to get out of bed.

I hope you find some kind of peace

CarlotaCoffee I'm so sorry for your poor Friend. What a horrific injury to suffer. Mine pales in comparison, but I can understand her feelings.

I will definitely try counselling once seeing a psychologist in person is an option. Thank you all for your kindness and for sharing your stories with me.