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Would you leave your child with this person?

50 replies

BeatrixPottersAlterEgo · 09/06/2020 20:34

I'm being deliberately vague so don't scold me Grin

Person means well, is extremely generous, and loves the child very much. Has children of their own,however they do the following

  • drive short distances without seat belts or car seats - I have seen their toddler standing up and bouncing on seats
  • thinks that choking concerns are nonsense - scoffs at any suggestions that grapes, Haribo or those hard lollies may be hazardous.
  • always smells of smoke though apparently smokes in garage
  • very lax about holding children's hands when out and about - have seen this person walking beside a main street with their under 3 trailing five foot behind.
  • absolutely no rules or regulations around sweets and takes great joy in stuffing children with sweets "don't tell mummy" etc
  • swear and use some very non PC terms around kids.
  • struggle to control the behaviour of their own children which can be quite rough.

When I write it down it seems obvious, but for a variety of boring reasons I'm going to have to be very firm in how I manage this person's expectations (lockdown aside) however neither do I want to cause a falling out, became they aren't a bad person in themselves

OP posts:
ColdToesHere · 09/06/2020 20:35

Nope. No way

JudithGrimes · 09/06/2020 20:35

No

Ipadipod · 09/06/2020 20:36

No

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Selfsettling3 · 09/06/2020 20:36

No. I only read the first point and it was no.

lachy · 09/06/2020 20:36

no.

Mylittlepony374 · 09/06/2020 20:37

No. Not a chance.

AllNewThings · 09/06/2020 20:39

No. The fact that they 'mean well' won't prevent your child from being injured.

monkeyonthetable · 09/06/2020 20:42

No. And don't worry about hurt feelings when you say no. People who don't 'believe' in choking hazards, don't hold children's hands in built up places and don't use safety belts in cars can afford to have their feelings hurt.

Dairymilkmuncher · 09/06/2020 20:44

Reading that I would say no way

But then realising that my dsis ticks all of those apart from the driving one I don't think she would take a kid without a car seat but would do equally as dangerous/stupid stuff with driving and that yeah she has had to help me out a couple times and she thought I was being a crazy first time mum and overbearing.

The think is she's only had my first born and when he was old enough to say, that's not a nice word or I'm not allowed those sweets. My youngest two would be up for the party so that aren't allowed.

Tricky situation op, hope it's not your family

BlusteryLake · 09/06/2020 20:45

Presumably this is a family member as you would no way consider paying for that care?

mymadworld · 09/06/2020 20:45

Who on earth is this person (or more precisely what's the relationship between them and child)? Unless she is the mother and you are separated and have no choice but to leave child with her, then you'd be utterly bonkers to even consider it!

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 09/06/2020 20:46

no

i didn't even read past no car seats and toddler standing and bouncing on seats!!!!

AdoptedBumpkin · 09/06/2020 20:46

Definitely not. The driving thing especially would put me off.

Spied · 09/06/2020 20:49

No, I'd be a wreck leaving my child in their care.

MinorArcana · 09/06/2020 20:49

No

carly2803 · 09/06/2020 20:49

at the first point i said no!

absolutely not

Tianalia · 09/06/2020 20:49

No.

meow1989 · 09/06/2020 20:52

Didnt read past the seat belt. No.

MrsBudd · 09/06/2020 20:52

No way.

stuckindoors77 · 09/06/2020 20:53

Well I wouldn't employ her, no. Is this your MIL?

Pinkblueberry · 09/06/2020 20:55

Well no, obviously. Just out of interest, what responsible qualities does this person have that make this a dilemma for you?

kayakingmum · 09/06/2020 20:55

I would possibly let her babysit for a couple of hours, in an emergency, if I really needed some help.

I wouldn't want her to drive my children anywhere.

solarlightexpress · 09/06/2020 20:55

No I wouldn't leave my child with this person.

ComDummings · 09/06/2020 20:56

Nope

roses2 · 09/06/2020 20:58

Depends on how often and what your alternative is. Preferably not if I could afford a nursery or nanny.