Is my baby gifted?

[Daddynotmummy84]

Hi all. First time poster, long time lurker.
With this being my first child, and the current issues making it difficult to compare my son to other babies development, I thought I'd ask for opinions here. A little of where my boy is at. He's 17 months, almoat outgrowing his 18-24 month clothes (bloody expensive). He can speak around 80 spoken words and 40ish in sign language. He's able to stack things really well (his best so far was 14 blocks). When it comes to puzzles etc he does the shapes in the slots really easy, same with the animal pizzles etc. Also, he only has to see you do something once, occasionally twice, and he can do it himself (within limits obviously). To this extent he now has to have his own tool kit and power drill out when I do DIY to do his own little project. He feeds himsel, helpa with food preparation, loads and unloads the washer and drier, even walks around picking up bits of rubbish to put in the bin or pulls the vaccum out and uses it (it's always on, the plug is behind a secure lock so he can't get to it. What I want to know, is this normal for a kid his age?
Oh, I feel I should mention he was crawling at 4 months, walking at 7 and a half months. At 9 months he wasn't speaking, other than the odd word, but could make 3 worded sentences with sign language.

Children are all very different. My dgs at 18months could recognise hexagons etc, he wasn't gifted he was just fascinated by shapes.
Best to just encourage what your dc is good at and enjoy him.

Like an actual power drill and making creations OP? Or is he getting out a plastic toy set?

Bless op.

Just enjoy your first born, he obviously bring a lot of joy to you watching him grow. Comparing is never good especially at this age. Please don't let this post get to you.

No I wouldn't say so, they clearly have good coordination and the crawling is very young. DS was 2 in April and he was early with everything. His language is particularly good but I wouldn't think he was gifted.

Just enjoy your baby, don't ask people if your child is gifted. It's not really the done thing 😂

Mine's 21 years old and still can't load/unload the washing machine.

My son liked to lick toilet seats at that age.

Kindly, he is your first. You have all the time in the world to devote to him therefore he is more able to pick up skills easily. If you look at the list of chores children are expected to do by age, he's doing fine, as - I assume he doesnt yet fill the drawer with detergent and program the washer/drier. Effectively he is developing his gross motor skills by putting things in a large space and fine motor skills by picking up small rubbish (I have a lovely video of mine sweeping the kitchen floor with a dustpan and brush at a similar age) and using the vacuum - he presumably sees the adults using it so knows it's nothing more complicated than one button to switch on and off.

That's not to say he isn't advanced or at the top end of expectations for his age, but I would be wary of creating an expectation that he will find everything easy to learn. It might be that right now, he is doing well learning by copying what he sees. And that is to be encouraged, but it doesn't make him a genius. It makes him a small child who, like many, is a sponge when it comes to learning things.

My youngest Ds seemed very advanced in some areas (understanding maths etc) but behind in others when he was little (speech, communication, emotional skills). He's now 15 and is still amazing at maths.
He's also recently been diagnosed with autism and struggles to even leave his bedroom, he is nearly 16 and can't leave the house independently. He has no friends and life is pretty crap for him. His amazing maths and science ability don't really mean much when he can't communicate and is so unhappy.

He has a power drill? Goodness, he could teach me how to use that! I would say he sounds like an incredible baby but I find they all plateau out eventually & those who don’t walk and talk early soon catch up to those that do.

He's probably advanced for his age but that doesn't necessarily mean gifted.
My youngest son was late talking. When he did talk he needed speech therapy as no one could understand a word.
He was slow at reading and couldn't sequence anything to save his life. He was on the special needs register until he was 10.
He is now a lawyer, having got a first from Cambridge.
Things change. Children change and develop at their own pace.

My son was advanced in all areas (for his age and expected development) at that age. He was smart, I felt incredible. Then a health visitor asked me, do I enjoy him? I was taken aback and realised that no, I didn't.

I was obsessed with development milestones and filling his day with educational activities. I think I made myself quite unwell with it all actually.

Now he's almost ten and he has severe Tourette Syndrome. He can barely hold an open cup to drink from. He can no longer write.

But I enjoy him.

I encourage him to embrace what he can do, no matter if it's developmentally now behind what another child of his age can do. Our children need to be celebrated for their personalities, their laughter and the joy they bring to us.

@Daddynotmummy84 I'm the mum of a PFB too, who I feel bloody proud of for being slightly ahead of the "average" milestones. Apparently they mostly all level out once they hit 5 or 6, but it's your prerogative to be proud of your child; ignore the bitchy posters on here.

I haven't RTFT so don't know if it's been mentioned already but have you looked into the Montessori method? Many people think it's all about wooden toys and letting your kid run wild in the forest, but it's actually about fostering their development at their own pace, encouraging their interests, and guiding them in practical life skills like vacuuming etc. If you're interested, the book "The Montessori Toddler" is a good place to start, and there are lots of really supportive FB groups too (although they do sometimes get bogged down in the silly "should I spend £100 on this wooden rainbow toy? / help, my MIL let my kid watch 20 minutes of TV, is he going to be ok?!" type posts, but I tend to just ignore those.

He sounds fine op. Similar to many other babies. You wouldn't know if your child was gifted until much later on. But these are all just ordinary milestones. Just enjoy your time with your child.

I'd give you and DC mum praise that non of his abilities that you're proud of includes a phone/tablet/tv.
He sounds clever but I'd keep that to yourself, especially don't brag about it to people you know, social media etc you can make other parents feel shit about themselves through no fault of their own.

my dd could do much the same at that age - I also raise you counting and talking in 2 languages as we lived abroad and she went to a local nursery. She also picked up Spanish from watching Dora knew and used countless makaton just from watching mr tumble. She learned all her sounds before school without me making any real attempt to teach her. She was slightly ahead of some dc starting school but dropped to average then slightly below average as they caught up - turned out she's dyslexic which also affects her maths. The numbers and letters and simple sums were no issue but anything more complex is where the issue lies. None of this was even slightly apparent til around age 5/6. Dd2 was a very late talker and walker, now age 7 she has the most sophisticated vocabulary which is often commented on, can do some of the maths meant for dd(11) despite being 4 years below her at school. She's not a genius either by the way it's that dc have strong points and weaker points and these often change from toddlerhood in to childhood

@AmaryllisNightAndDay just scrolled back through the thread - what a lovely post.
"All babies are gifted in different ways" 💕

Actually, yes he is very advanced. My ds is 17 months and is only just pushing a walker around and says 2 words. :(

This is what pisses me off about these threads.
Please don't feel like this. Horrible bragging about a baby Ffs.
Many a poster will have delayed children (not saying your child is delayed)
My dc is 22 months and doesn't say a single word. I'm not comparing. I have autism and didn't speak for a while but I was on every gifted and talented register. Please try not to compare.

My DS was talking in full sentences by his first birthday. I had many people comment on how bright he was. The health visitor was slightly shocked. He failed GCSE English. (Aged 16, I didn't enter him aged 5 or anything )

From what I know of 'gifted' children who are that advanced early on, is the they turn out to be very, very overactive and get bored very easily and overstimulating and pushing them beyond the natural learning stages will create it. I have seen this over many, many years.

To be honest i'm most impressed with his animal pizzle knowledge. I mean I could tell you which was which if it came to distinguishing between the pizzle of an elephant and that of a mouse, but line up a range of similarly sized animals and I'd be hard pressed to pin the right pizzle on the right animal. I find it hard enough with pin the tail on the donkey, when only one animal and one body part is involved.

Kudos to your little lad.

My DD is 17 months and I’m pretty sure she does all of that OP. She couldn’t be arsed to walk until 15 months tho so she needs to pull her finger out. Your DS sounds like a fab little toddler to me.

There’s a Mum in my NCT group who is fond of pointing out her DS’s “achievements” all the bloody time on our what’s app group and it upsets a couple of others who worry about their babies being behind. I prefer to talk about DD climbing in the bin.

I think most of the people on here have felt similar about their dc at various points. It's amazing how quickly they develop.

My dc are all teens (or nearly) and what I've learnt is that these little things we obsess over when they're tiny mean nothing for later life.
I don't think these things show natural ability necessarily, but even if they do then their personality and external influences come in.
For example, dd2 was walking at the age that dd1 was just about crawling. She is naturally more sporty. Maybe the crawling showed that? But she doesn't have the perseverance that dd1 has, the concentration and the drive to want to be better. So although dd2 has had more opportunities offered her through the natural ability, all in all she's achieved similarly to dd1.

We used to be told that between 18 and 60 words at 18 months is considered "normal". So yes, he would be a little above that. But not extraordinarily so.
My dd1 was staying (with me) at Granny's at 19 months. She was asked to choose a towel. She was a very long time. Granny asked her if she'd finished and she said. "Not finished. I still choosing towel. Downstairs in moments."
Cracked us up. Advanced at the time? Yes. Is she gifted? No. It had no signs on her future English ability. In fact English was definitely not her strong point.

At the age your dc is, they want to impress you, do things with you, get attention from you. So if you admire how well they're using their (I assume) plastic tools, then they'll want to get them out again and show you again.
Do encourage it. Let them watch you, join in with little things (I remember picking up woodshavings to "help" my dad) and as they get older maybe they'll be interested enough to want to really learn and be a real help.

He feeds himsel, helpa with food preparation, loads and unloads the washer and drier, even walks around picking up bits of rubbish to put in the bin or pulls the vaccum out and uses it
My experience is all mine loved to do these things at your dc's age. They love to be helpful and "just like mummy/daddy". Unfortunately the appeal for doing it generally fades as they become more useful in doing it.
Yes, mine can all do the above still. Not only that but they sometimes do it voluntarily. But not with the enthusiasm they had at 18 months. Except perhaps when they're making chocolate cake and wanting to lick out the bowl.

Enjoy your little one. He's amazing. But it doesn't matter whether he is amazingly gifted or behind. Just rejoice in what he does. Tell him he's fantastic and he'll want to impress you and do it again. Keep on being amazed at him, but love him for who he is and not his abilities. Build a secure foundation under him so he can try things and not succeed and try again.
It'll help you when he hits the teenage years and the longest sentence you get is a grunt of "you're embarrassing".

Oh bless you!! I haven't read the full thread, but your baby sounds perfect normal. Not gifted, but interested in the world and developing quickly as they do at that age. It is lovely that you are obviously so delighted by your baby. Leave it at that though and don't be searching for something that's not there.

For what its worth I secretly hoped my toddler was gifted and then he fell head first into box of toys at his two year check!

Bloody hell. You should loan him out, plenty people on mn moaning their cleaners aren't working just now.