I can't keep up with my washing. Am so ashamed.

[Conspiracy3]

Firstly I have really bad depression. Anxiety. Other mental health issues at play (personality disorder)

Family of 7.

Ive tried today to sort it and I have about 12 baskets of washing to do.

I'm sat here crying my eyes out. I just can't do it.

Even when I have a huge sort out it just piles up again.

The kids SEEM to have too many clothes but then the older ones have a growth spurt and need more and stuff gets passed down.

There's bags and baskets of washing everywhere.
I don't drive so can't go laundrette.

I just want to have a bonfire and burn it all and be nudists

I'm so embarrassed. So ashamed.

I just can't keep on top of it

Do you want tips how to do it ? It sounds terribly overwhelmingly for you and that won't help. I'd sort out clothes that don't fit won't be worn and bin them, then start on underwear wash it all it will surprise you how much you can do, then tomorrow start on bottom halfs. The kids can help sort through.

I’m sorry you feel like this.

Do you have a washing machine and access to an outside space with a washing line? Things are drying really quickly in this weather! If you don’t would you be able to get a machine / line?

I have a washing rota - x & y’s sheets Monday, dark clothes Tuesday, a & b’s sheets Wednesday and so on - I find it really really helps.

Do you have a utility room or somewhere you can have dirty clothes baskets - one for light colours and one for dark? Everyone puts their clothes into the appropriate basket - if it’s not in the basket it doesn’t get washed.

Fold and sort as you take things off the line and put away IMMEDIATELY- children / dh responsible for doing their own clothes.

If you have a machine and it has a timer setting put a load in before you go to bed and set it so it’s finished as you get up so you can hang it out straight away.

OP if you can afford it, pay for them to collect and do the 12 loads.

They won't think anything - if they do, who cares?

Pay them, clear the backlog, and be kind to yourself.

You're doing your best.

If I get behind, I send it for a service wash and just give a false name, generally people who have pissed me off.

I find it helps to have a "slot" in the day when you think about washing, and do that every day. In winter, it's after the DC have been in the bath - empty the washing basket into the washer and stick on the airer overnight. Just do that every night if there's a load there (4/7 days there are at least).

Right now I'm in summer mode and I do it after my shower. Grab the washing basket on the way out of the bathroom, and put that in. Then all out on the line, take in at teatime. If there isn't a full load, I consider stripping beds or putting towels in.

With lockdown I'm really reviewing how often we change clothes - workout clothes need changing every day but working from home doesn't mess up your clothes without the sweat of commuting and general running about so my clothes can go two days easily enough. I don't iron much when there's only us here. Bedding can go straight from the line back on to beds in summer which is a bonus.

Kids are old enough to help and do in many ways but washing is down to me

Why? Surely some of them are old enough to sort clothes into whites/colours and shove them in accordingly. Even if you prefer to actually check and switch on yourself, they could still empty and carry out to line or put in dryer.

You haven't said how old, just that they are old enough to help. My dcs have been in charge of their own washing since they were 12. DH does his own washing People always come on saying that it is wasteful but our machine never runs half empty. In general we generate 1 load each per week plus beddings towels etc, which get washed when needed.

Sorry to hear you're struggling. You're not the only one.

First thing is first - you've already made a start, even though it was hard and you have mental health stuff going on - that's brilliant well done!

Next thing's next. You don't have to do 12 loads of washing. You only have to do one at a time. So let's get the next one load on, shall we? And then let's have a cup of tea

Don’t stress about it!

Do you have a washing line/whirly gig outside to hang washing out?

Pick the shortest cycle on your machine, mine is less than an hour for a full load. Then get it hung out, stick another one in the machine and by the time that’s done the stuff outside will be dry enough to bring in and put the fresh load out.

I have a really big whirly gig from Costco and it’s worth the money as I can get three loads out at once if I have to.

I prefer towels in the tumble dryer so if you have a load of towels stick them in and then straight into tumble dryer whilst your other stuff is on the line.

Once you’ve caught up I would advise having a good declutter. Just go through one kids clothes at a time/per day. Set yourself a timer (15 minutes?) and do as much sorting as you can. Once timer is up that’s it.

Your older kids could do the same for their own wardrobes depending on age. My eldest is 11 and could look through her stuff and bring to me what’s too small, Doesn’t suit, etc

First thing is to remember that washing is never done. Ever. Just when you think it's 'done' a load more appears as if by magic, so please don't think you have to do it all in one go.

Second thing is that you are not the only one who is responsible for it, even little ones can put their clothes away.

Third thing I'd be ruthless about what gets put in the wash in the first place, if it can be worn again it gets taken out.

Finally, don't try and iron everything, things like bedding and pjs are nice if they're ironed but serve the purpose just as well if not. Just start with one load, check out the programmes on your machine and avoid the really long ones. If you use the quick wash you can always respin it after before pegging out or putting in the tumble. Good luck x

If feeding and clearing up after your gang is taking loads of time and effort, think about swapping out one of your dryers for a dishwasher and adding a couple of days really easy meals to your roster: frozen pizza, pasta and sauce, oven chips and a preroast chicken. It’s easy to get caught up in time consuming meals when you are catering for a crowd every day.

I agree, just do a little, take a look at what you have achieved for a moment, and don't think about the other loads that need doing. They can wait. Just do what you can right now and the rest will be done when you get to it. So yeh, have a cup of tea, and give yourself a break. No one else can do that for you.

We're a family of 6 including one in reusable nappies, I have to do 2 washes a day to keep on top. Any time we get a stomach bug I have to take a day off work to manage hot washing all bedding and towels in one go

Luckily, the weather is your friend right now!

1. You definitely have more clothes than you need if you have 12 loads to wash and your family are not currently nude. It's helped me to cut down so each child has 3 of most things: 3-4 school uniform sets (and football kits, for my foot all-obsessed pair), 3 long trousers, 3 pairs of shorts, 3 long sleeved tops, 2-3 hoodies/jumpers, 1 warm coat, 1 rain coat, 1 hat - plus 5 or so pairs of socks and pants. It does help to have all boys here!!

1. Unless all 12 loads are your things, it shouldn't just be your problem. Older children can manage completely, or even my 4, 6 and 8 year olds sort their own washing into white/dark/woollen piles and then help me with hanging, folding and sorting. If yours are older and don't help you tackle the mound, then I'd say - kindly and calmly but firmly - that they obviously don't care that much about these clothes, and once clean they can be donated to children who do need them. If they truly don't care then that's telling!
2. Ongoing - you'll likely need to do 2 loads a day, it is a lot of work, and you'll need to sort a rota of some sort. Can you do a family meeting and ask your partner (if you have one) and kids to suggest solutions? They may have good ones, and it helps them feel ownership. It can be linked to pocket money for older ones, or made more fun for littlies (e.g. one helps with pegs, one throws you washing, you hang it up, and another sets a timer to see how quickly you can hang up a whole load and beat a previous record).
3. If you haven't already, sack off ironing, it's one of the benefits of lockdown

You can do this! Good luck

Im Sorry you're struggling gat the moment.

Maybe write yourself ( and family) up with a plan or schedule. Perhaps they each put in a load and are responsible for making sure it's on/ washer/ hung out/ put away (dependent on age obviously)

I'm sure there are things that you will be able to do to make it more manageable - the weather is perfect for drying at the minute

Have you done any loads today?

I might get a taxi down. I have so much though. What will they think

'Wahay. Lots of business!'
They're a laundrette. They don't judge people for taking laundry to them.

If you're not going to use the laundrette service, get your household to help. And please be kinder to yourself. Would you judge a friend who said they felt overwhelmed by laundry? Or would you listen to them, be sympathetic and perhaps help them with solutions?

My kids do laundry. I have a big master pile & one kids primary ‘chore’ is to do one load a day. It leaves me one wash a week to do of ‘tricky’ things. Odd bit does get ruined - can’t be too precious - but its actually been a very successful delegation here.

I agree with others - the kids (and husband!) need to help.

Personally I don't find it helpful for others to start washes off as they sort stuff strangely or use the wrong powder or don't bother dealing with balled up socks/inside out clothes etc. So I try to do all the actual washing.

Once the clothes are washed, either DH or I hang them on the line/airers as the kids are a bit young really to hang things so they won't need ironing.

I have 7 folding plastic crates that live on the landing. All dry washing gets sorted into the crates - one per person plus one for "household" stuff like tea towels and bedding. When I take it off the airer/bring the basket from the line I just chuck it in to the crates as I can't cope with folding the mixed loads.

Whenever I have a minute I fold a crate of washing and put it in the right bedroom. Everyone puts away their own washing except the baby, and DH puts away the household stuff. At the moment my kids are all under 10, so I've said I will fold their washing for them, but if they don't put it away and return the crate then I can't fold more (because no crate) and it'll just be dumped in their room unfolded. This mostly makes them put it away and return the crate fairly promptly. As they get older they'll be responsible for folding their clothes as well as putting them away, and then will start washing/hanging out too, though that feels a little way away and I don't want to lose my control over how stuff is washed.

In your shoes I would start washing and drying now - aim for three loads per day u til the backlog is cleared and then one load. Meanwhile order some folding crates on Amazon if finances permit (at least for the kids). Family meeting to explain that they're now responsible for their crates ...

Like the above poster has said, by little crates. These are my life saver.

Dried washing gets put into the correct crate with whoever's name on it and then goes straight into their room, it's their responsibility to put it away

Also, just buy another washer

I’m sorry you’re feeling overwhelmed. I don’t have anywhere near as much washing as you to do, but when it does get backed up, I sort it into manageable loads.

For instance, I might get all the dark socks and pants and small items and put them in. Tumble dry and they’re done.
Then all the jeans and jogging pants together.
Then the small white items and then the larger white items.

Works for me.

Right now though - we only change clothes twice a week - so its not piling up at all . Lockdown bonus as far as we’re concerned - especially with warm weather. Buy some ‘small’ clothes (like vest and stretchy shorts) for days in - easier to wash than real clothes

If it helps, copy my washing schedule:

M: Multi-coloured load
T: Towel load
W: White load
T: Multi-coloured load
F: Bedding load

I suspect lots of us wash things that maybe don't really need washing.

My opinion:
Underwear - one wear
Most clothes - more than one wear (the cooler the weather, the more wears
Towels - once a week (if possible)
Bedding - once a week (if possible)

Take a deep breath and make a plan to do two loads.
Its only overwhelming because its built up.
Put the radio on, and put a load in.
You can get through this. You have to.
Youre getting to that time of year when we dont wear such big heavy clothes, so once youve got through this lot, it wont build up as much again.

Just sort it out now and when it’s dried make sure it’s put straight away . Go through what is dirty and throw out anything that you don’t need or has seen better days and in future do that as it gets worn so you thin out the amount of clothes . Older children can put there own away and make sure they do it . Once you’ve got on top of it once it will be easier to keep on top of it . The house will look even smaller if you have washing hanging about everywhere .

Folding crates are fa good idea. I use ikea trofast and tubs for sorting.