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Original poster

Can you just “fall asleep?”

142 replies

Soubriquet · 29/05/2020 19:07

My dh can.

One minute we can be watching a film and the next he’s out

I can’t. No matter how tired I am, I can’t just fall asleep.

I have to get comfy, shuffle about, toss and turn about 50 times and then start to pretend to dream.

OP posts:
isthismylifenow · 29/05/2020 20:32

It takes me ages.

Most nights I use the calm app to listen to a sleep story. Problem is I only have the free version and I think I could rattle off Stephen Fry reading Blue Gold like a champ.

My ex do would pee me off as would fall asleep and start snoring within 5 mins. Then there was just no way I could fall asleep. I'm less grumpy since being single.

I am very nervous to take any sort of slepping medication as I'm too afraid I won't be able to do without them if I start.

Potplant · 29/05/2020 20:37

Nope, I’ve never been able to. I either can’t fall asleep or drop off easily but then awake from 3am and can’t beget back to sleep.

Though I am taking medication currently which makes me drowsy and has massively helped my sleeping. I’ve had full nights sleep for months. It has made such a huge difference.

Mummyshark2018 · 29/05/2020 20:37

My dh can, literally his head hits pillow, I can hear his breathing change and he's snoring in 5 minutes. I used to be pretty good but lockdown has messed my routine and some nights I'm not sleeping til 1-2am then need to sleep til 9.

Chocachocaholic · 29/05/2020 20:39

@golddustwomen I'm the same as you. Have a wee before getting into bed then have to get up and have another before sleep Grin
I nod off on the sofa every weekend watching series or films but get into bed and it takes me ages prob 30 mins. It's very annoying. Am also another one who can't sleep on planes/trains or cars either. My dh also falls asleep in a blink of an eye! Probably one of the reasons I struggle sleeping is because he is gone and snoring in less than 5 mins Angry
I also wake up a lot in the night! Since getting my Fitbit I've realised how poor I sleep! I must wake up at least 5 times!

KeirStarmerDonkeyFarmer · 29/05/2020 20:40

I fall asleep very quickly when I go to bed, can’t bloody stay asleep though. Definitely not past 6am, at the moment not past 4.30/5am and usually premenstrual I’m awake solidly from 3am for a couple of hours, and glad to get back to sleep at all.

hiredandsqueak · 29/05/2020 20:41

I can fall asleep reasonably easily if I have an audiobook on but I wake at any noise no matter how small after about an hour and a half and then it's a nightmare to try and get back to sleep.

isabellerossignol · 29/05/2020 20:42

I can fall asleep anywhere, any time. I'm not fond of flying, yet I can still sleep on a plane. I fall asleep really easily watching TV or reading a book.

But... I'm also a terrible insomniac. I might sleep for half an hour and then be awake for the rest of the night.

sanityisamyth · 29/05/2020 20:46

I wish. I have had insomnia for sooooo many years. It takes me hours to fall asleep. Even when I'm exhausted.

icansmellburningleaves · 29/05/2020 20:48

Try taking magnesium supplements. Lack of magnesium, which is very common can cause sleep problems. I’ve been sleeping better since I’ve been taking it. I also use the Calm sleep story app on my phone. It’s excellent for helping you relax which of course helps with sleep.

marmitepasta · 29/05/2020 20:50

Having had a stressful few years, I now struggle to get to sleep unless I listen to the radio as falling asleep.

I put an ear bud in and listen to a programme where people talk which is vaguely interesting but not so interesting that I won't fall asleep. I often listen to you and yours on radio 4. I think it just means le mind can switch off from the stresses. Usually asleep within 10 mins if I do this.

PolkaDotsPolka · 29/05/2020 20:52

No I can't, but DH can.

BikeRunSki · 29/05/2020 20:52

I fall asleep in front of the tv with no effort quite regularly.
Takes me ages to fall asleep deliberately in bed.

amusedtodeath1 · 29/05/2020 20:52

I'm really bad at getting to sleep, if only my brain had an off button. After years of trying this and that, I've settled on an audiobook and wireless headband headphones similar to PP, but without the mask bit. Even if I can't sleep straight away I'm not catastrophizing everything and getting myself all stressed out.

Gooseygoosey12345 · 29/05/2020 20:53

I wish I could. DH can, and he's refreshed after any amount of sleep. If I nap (very very rarely) I feel ten times worse afterwards and the rest of the day is a write off. It takes me, at best, 30 mins to fall asleep once I've gone to bed

ScarfLadysBag · 29/05/2020 20:54

I can fall asleep fine in bed or when I want to, but I never fall asleep watching something or listening to something. I'd find that really annoying anyway! I like my sleep to be a conscious decision Grin

ooooweee · 29/05/2020 20:54

Question for everyone - if you fall asleep easily, does it take you ages to wake up?

DH takes ages to get to sleep but when he's awake, he's 100% awake.

I on the other hand, fall asleep within seconds but wake up very very slowly... I can hear first, but can't respond to conversation, then my eyes open, then finally when the brain kicks into life I can talk....

DuckALaurent · 29/05/2020 20:54

Yeah I can easily fall asleep in minutes.

Sleep like I’ve been sedated too. Weirdly in times of severe stress I often fall asleep faster and sleep deeper. It’s as if my brain wants to switch off from all the worry even more than usual.

DH is sooooo jealous of my super sleep power as he sleeps like shit.

DuckALaurent · 29/05/2020 20:56

@ooooweee

Question for everyone - if you fall asleep easily, does it take you ages to wake up?

DH takes ages to get to sleep but when he's awake, he's 100% awake.

I on the other hand, fall asleep within seconds but wake up very very slowly... I can hear first, but can't respond to conversation, then my eyes open, then finally when the brain kicks into life I can talk....

Nope I fall asleep fast and wake up fast too. Once I’m awake I’m up and at ‘em so to speak.
peajotter · 29/05/2020 20:56

Yes. It’s my special skill.

I reckon most of it is out of our control, but I do think there’s something to be said for triggers and routines, same as for babies.

I had a job where I was often in a plane exhausted after long shifts. It got to the stage that whenever I heard plane engines starting up I fell asleep.

Chillipeanuts · 29/05/2020 20:56

Yes, my husband can. Really frustrating actually. I’m so much more physically active than he is but he spends his working days concentrating intensely and focusing on mentally demanding tasks.
He’s snoring by 10. I’m looking at the news and wondering whether a marmite sandwich would be unreasonable.

ikeairgin · 29/05/2020 21:02

I used to be able to before children - I went to boarding school and then was in the Army - so I learned to sleep through any amount of noise and anywhere to get 40 winks - on the back of a 10 tonne truck, in the air, on the cold hard ground etc.

Then had a really shitty delivery with second child and ended up with my mh shot to bits, finally after 15 years of treatment/counselling for C-PTSD and general anxiety disorder I've had a great run of two years.

To sleep well at night I have to live well in the day - that means fresh air and exercise and eating well and a meditation in the evening about 1/2 hour before bed. I do listen to audiobooks and I do have the bluetooth headband speakers which are a godsend. I'm menopausal and take a menopace night suppliment that helps, too.

These days I stay asleep. Thankfully

MrsT1405 · 29/05/2020 21:03

I can go to sleep very easily. I did an overnight on call job in the days when you could work all hours. You learn to empty your mind and pull it back from 'thinking' too much. You learn not to chew things over too much. If I really have to think something through, I really concentrate on it, then physically turn over and stop thinking about anything.

weegiemum · 29/05/2020 21:07

I take a variety of medications for my chronic illness that are sedating, even then it takes me 2hrs from taking them to sleeping.

Dhs superpower is falling asleep. He has sleep apnoea and puts his mask on, turns on the wee machine and - bang, he's out!

namechangenumber2 · 29/05/2020 21:07

I normally can, fall asleep anywhere, any table any chair... Grin

Not currently though, awake 2/3 hours through the night Sad. Been like it since the start of lockdown, absolutely shattered!

StopMakingATitOfUrselfNPissOff · 29/05/2020 21:14

Yes I'm asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.

I genuinely believe it starts in baby/childhood. I'm from a big family so assume I was forced to sleep in noisy/light circumstances. Even now I can drop off anywhere if I put my mind to it.

I'm the wife version of the husbands every complain about, I don't hear our kids crying in the night. Confused

My DH was a terrible sleeper as a kid and still is.