Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

When is my mum going to be allowed to see her grandchildren again!?

52 replies

Imknackeredzzz · 22/05/2020 03:12

Hello my mum is 69 and in good health. I have a. 5 and 2 year old who she usually sees three times a week and is missing horrendously.

When on earths do you think she’s going to be allowed to see/ hug them again? Of course we do FaceTime and all that, but it’s not the same and she’s understandably getting very down about it all

I’m hearing lots of info about restaurants and cafes etc opening- but not a lot about grenadparents and grandchildren - or have I missed it?!

OP posts:

Bottomplasters · 22/05/2020 03:16

When social distancing is over I would think so quite a while for us all

wherestheotherone · 22/05/2020 04:19

It's dreadful isn't it. I am hoping the English will have a similar set up to Scotland. One household outdoors. Even just to see family face to face will make a huge difference. I'm very disappointed in this aspect of the lockdown easing. A cuppa in a garden at a distance to watch children in the family play and have a conversation would do everyone the world of good.

NoHardSell · 22/05/2020 05:14

It's entirely up to you and your mother. Many people ditched that weeks ago, after making their own risk assessment. If you want to wait for the rules to change, I don't think it will be that long - few more weeks maybe?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families

PowerStruggle · 22/05/2020 05:21

Socially distanced she can see them now surely?

GirlCalledJames · 22/05/2020 05:22

Can’t she see them now one at a time outside at 2 m distance? That was what I understood.

DownADirtRoad · 22/05/2020 05:27

The guidance says you can meet somewhere as long as you do social distancing so she can see them now although not hug.

Destroyedpeople · 22/05/2020 05:33

There is no 'rule' that says you cannot meet up.

Sassenach85 · 22/05/2020 05:38

I think a crucial question is when can grandparents provide childcare again? In Scotland people are allowed in your home in phase 3 but it still says to physically distance!?

GlennRheeismyfavourite · 22/05/2020 06:08

My parents are 68 and 69 and in good health. I'm done with it all. I'm taking my 2 year old to their house in half term for a visit. I can't be shut up with a toddler any longer. I've just reached the end of the line. Selfish - maybe, I don't care!

HouseOfSticks · 22/05/2020 06:36

The rules say you can only meet two a time. I checked this yesterday as I’m desperate for DD to see my mum. Do children count as a person though?

ChewChewIsMySpiritAnimal · 22/05/2020 06:45

Just go and see her.

Heartlake · 22/05/2020 06:49

Do your own risk assessment.

If your mum has lots of DGCs that she's seeing, is still working, is shopping, is going out and about with questionable social distancing, then be cautions.

Otherwise, if you're all keeping to the guidance and all other contact is very minimal, agree that you'll create your own bubble.

The govt have to draw the line somewhere. It's less about who is related to who and more of a numbers game. Some people have literally hoardes of DCG!

Magicbabywaves · 22/05/2020 06:51

Go and see her. My husband is taking our kids to see his mother this weekend.

WhereIsTheSaladDoris · 22/05/2020 06:54

The rules say you can only meet two a time. I checked this yesterday as I’m desperate for DD to see my mum. Do children count as a person though?

Do you own risk assessment of risk. I’m of the view that children also need to see their friends/family.

Keep to an open space, maintain 2 metres apart and of course don’t meet if you have symptoms.

I met with dd1’s best friends’ mum yesterday. I brought dd1, she brought both of her DC. We walked for over 4 miles and it did us all the world of good, mentally and physically (both our children have been lazy and not doing much exercise). Kids were really good, chatting away and maintaining distance.

frasersmummy · 22/05/2020 06:56

You're right about the wording but by this phase all childcare facilities hairdressers gyms retail and pubs are all reopening.

So it seems more than reasonable that grandparents can be providing childcare and or hugs

Ifailed · 22/05/2020 06:57

ignore "the rules", they are made-up by politicians on the fly and have no basis in law.
If you are in England, the law is quite easy to understand: www.legislation.gov.uk/uksi/2020/350/made

There are restrictions on gatherings in public spaces, and on travel, but it is clear that children can go to meet a parent who doesn't live in their household, and for the purposes of this paragraph, “parent” includes a person who is not a parent of the child, but who has parental responsibility for, or who has care of, the child;

So if your mum has had care for your child in the past, they they can continue to provide care now.

jbiscuits · 22/05/2020 06:57

I'm so fed up with people saying 'just go and see them', 'you can meet up outside', etc. That's all well and good if you live close enough, but doesn't help people who don't live near their families. I desperately want to go and stay with PIL (under 60, retired, we've been WFH), but I don't think we'd get there without one of the kids needing the loo on the motorway or something! 🙁

jbiscuits · 22/05/2020 06:59

Under 70 that was meant to say.

MerryDeath · 22/05/2020 07:00

use your common sense. i've seen my family 3x in the last 2/3 weeks after ~7 weeks apart. no one has dropped dead or been arrested. we've been outdoors and on private land. no regrets here. the govt don't know what they are doing anymore than i do in this scenario, and just because someone says it's ok doesn't mean you aren't going to give/receive the coronavirus. if you fee the risk of harm is greater from lack of contact (i do) then see them!

UnsureOfFuture · 22/05/2020 07:00

We're seeing my parents on Sunday. And I know my DC will be all over them, which is why I've waited until now.

We've managed to get food deliveries for the last 3 weeks. So not even been in a shop. I've been delivering their food and helping them anyway so I can't see there's any extra risk and they'll get to see something different to their own 4 walls.

Eldest DC got chosen for the random testing and that came back negative.

My dad doesn't have long left as he has a degenerative condition and is going downhill rapidly. My mum is going mad caring for him alone.

So I'm cooking them dinner Sunday and we'll enjoy a nice day. We all need it and I feel there's no corona risk.

Teacher12345 · 22/05/2020 07:10

Do people really think that a 2 & 5 yr old are going to be able to socially distance from their Grandma that they haven't see for 8 weeks?
I would love for mine to see their Grandparents but they won't be able to control the impulse to hug them and would get upset.

I am hoping they lift them enough to go to the park with them over the next few weeks. I lift an hour from my parents though so not sure how we will manage that.

00100001 · 22/05/2020 07:15

Well, she can see them, just not cuddle them.

Howeve, saying that... If it's causing that much upset.... Just let he have a cuddle.

You could take precautions, have the kids and your mum wash their hands, face etc before cuddles and then again after...

I hugged my sister the other day.... It made it all feel so much better. The sense of doom just lifted and has helped me adjust to the "New Normal ™"

ScreamingKid · 22/05/2020 07:22

Its nonsense. Why can you go to a public place to meet one person whilst maintaining social distance, but you cant meet any more than one despite the fact you are surrounded by others? My local park has people all over the place in it. Which if I dont know them is apparently fine , but if I want to meet people I know in that same park I can only do so one at a time.

bulletjournalbilly · 22/05/2020 07:25

Just see her! Are you going to live in fear for the rest of her life ....

00100001 · 22/05/2020 07:30

@ScreamingKid. It's to stop large groups of people. Because all if a sudden, if they said you can meet one other family ... You might conceivably have groups of 8-12 people all mingling.

Flip

1 2 3