I've just seen a photo of myself...

[Wallybigboots]

and I started crying. I'm so fat and lumpy. I didn't know I looked like that. Just weighed myself and I'm over 16 stone and size 20. This is how people see me I don't want to be this person. I look 10 years older than I am.

If you’re interested in wearing make up then definitely look at tutorials on youtube. There are some great tips on there, from neutral day to day make up to full-on glam looks. Make up should be fun so watch loads of tutorials and then have a go yourself!

You can pick up sets of brushes fairly cheaply and you can spend as much or as little as you like. There are some great dupes for high end products available in Superdrug.

I watched a video of me playing with DD and the double chin and fat face was utterly repulsive. I'm size 14, 5ft10 and was just under 15st although no one ever believes im that heavy as i do carry well although obviously overweight. I got straight on the excercise bike 2 weeks ago and have only missed a couple of nights. That was the motivation i needed to get my ass in gear. Went from 10km taking 30 mins to now doing 15km in 35.

A lot of people look worse in pictures OP!
Use this as a catalyst, you can make the positive changes. It’ll get better

I just read a short article on this and it makes perfect sense. What you see in the photo is not a true image of who you are. It’s not-but it is. Cameras and angles are tricky things. blog.photofeeler.com/why-do-i-look-different-in-pictures-what-do-i-look-like-to-others/

In photos I look like a giant chin with a weird skin condition which looks like there's some sort of humanoid creature attached to said chin.
However, my mother says I have a wonderful personality

Oh god me too. It's only in pictures I realise how much weight I've put on.

For the last few weeks I've tried to do at least some form of exercise once a day- can't say I've noticed any difference but it's a start!!!

My little bit of advice would be to focus on skincare routine before or as well as a makeup regime (unless you already do?!).
Waking up with glowing, dewy, smooth skin is such a lovely feeling and will give you some confidence on your journey ahead. It’s something you realise you have control over with faster results than weight loss and you’ll see that if you can do that you can do whatever you need to be comfortable in your body.

My DD took a photo of me yesterday, while I was talking to her on Facetime. She then put it on Facebook - I'd just got out of bed and hadn't brushed my hair , still in my wrinkled old nightie, glasses wonky and one eye shut. I can't even delete it because she put it there ! it made me feel like a 100 year old sea monster. Yet DD obviously thought I looked fine since she put it up there. I had to put it in the "get over it" file and move on. But I've made myself a promise to get some exercise and eat better ( AND brush my hair before answering the phone !)

Ive got the opposite problem. I look much much better in photos than I am real life. I don't know why. People always kinda act surprised that pics are me, comments like, 'Christ is that you...what like now?' Ive had it for years so I know what they are thinking. I guess im just really photogenic but Im like a minger in real life. I dont like putting pics up of myself because I feel that's what people are thinking. I also quite like what I see in the mirror, Im thin, size 10, but people are always surprised by this, and talk to me and about me like Im big. Maybe I just have the opposite of body dysmorphia or something. lol and I actually am but cant see it - but I guess dress size/weight doesn't lie.

I like that

I feel the exact same, I can't look at photos of myself or I feel sick. I can't stand when people post photos of me online either.

I had one of those moments OP, my DS took a photo of me, I thought in my head I was looking nice, in a lovely outfit, when I saw the photo I didnt recognise the fat old woman looking at me...It was a turning point for me, I lost 4 stone and vowed to never get like that again, sadly I am back where I started now so remembering that photo, I am going to start on my journey again, x

Print that photo and write with a sharpie the sentence you put on your opening post here : "I don't want to be this person" and things can only get better.
It will be hard work, but one thing after the other , it will improve. '
Luckily you, it is Monday today, so what better day to start your journey. The first thing, clean your cupboards. Bin, all the processed food. From biscuits to crisps, sauces, spreads, any packet with white flour (called wheat flour on the label but keep the wholemeal flour) ... You don't need guidance. You know what will do your body good and what not.

Now that you have removed the bad stuff you need to learn about the good stuff, and this is where it gets a bit more complicated but Dr Jason Fund explains it very well in his book the obesity code or you can watch some of his videos

fir a short version or a 6 hours detailed cut into 1 hour chunks

So hello to the new you, even if it is only in your mind for now. We are here and we will accompany you.

@badassbitch lol I have the exact same issue. My niece took a selfie of me and her together recently and even my mum didn’t believe it was a recent picture.

Ds took a pic of me when we were out for a walk the other day. When he forwarded it on to me later I asked him why he was sending me a photo of a fat, old squinty eyed woman.

I’m very wrinkly OP and much older than I think I look

I think you are young and at least you can lose some weight, can’t turn the clock back

Madcattery, that's an interesting article, thanks for posting!!

@Footywife I love your supportive and encouraging comments!

I put a 50s type tea dress on on Friday for VE Day that I last wore 8 years ago for my 60 th
I just to say got it zipped up
I need to lose weight
As it had a big circular skirt there was no problem of it fitting my over large hips..but the waist 😱and the bust😱
What have I morphed into
I’ve given up on my face
Just glad to be alive

Can I suggest you also think about what you want from life and include goals that aren't appearance based - it really helped me.

A photo was my catalyst for losing 2.5 stone and getting down to a slim figure. If you don't want to look like you do any more now is a good time to start your weight loss journey- there are a ton of supportive threads on Mumsnet.

Good luck OP! We're all with you.

Somehow I hauled my overweight butt out of bed at 6am this morning for the first day of an online coaching program with my old personal trainer. DD is 15months now so no new motherhood excuses. DH has lost 15kg since Christmas. I'm letting the side down and am hopefully taking the first steps to see you on Christmas Eve 2020 flashing an awesome smile at the camera 🤩

Ok now I have to bring a bit of reality to this self loathing thread.

OP - you’ve had a nasty shock and you want to lose weight. That’s a good thing for your HEALTH. It is not a good thing for your self worth. Because your worth and your value is not weighed in stones and pounds.

The words people use on here to describe themselves are so horrifying. I can’t help feeling that you wouldn’t read the same things on a men’s forum. We are conditioned to feel we must be slim and beautiful to have worth, it’s so sad and so wrong.

Just answer this question, would you love a friend less if they put on weight?

Of course not!

So do lose weight for your health, it is essential and valuable (and btw I am several stones overweight have gone up and down on the scales all my life) but do it for your health, do it if it makes you feel better but that is the only reason to do it.

Sending much love and self worth to everyone on this thread, cameras can be brutal and only show one tiny facet of who you are.

@Awesome2020 Thank you.

It's so hard as a woman, particularly as we get older. We see the old 'me' disappearing in a pile of wrinkles and extra layers. We're still there underneath it but we have to make that extra effort.

Just about to do my morning workout 😊

Oh me too op. My son took a photo of me last week. I was looking down and had so many chins. It was hideous.

The thing is when I get dressed and stand in front of the mirror I look ok - because I’m stood up and looking to my best advantage. It’s the photos that catch me more unawares or sitting or something where there’s the rolls of fat that shock me.

So I’m on the same journey as you now. I’ve done 1 week of much healthier eating and am a couple of pounds lighter already. It feels good to be doing something positive. And as pp have suggested I have that photo for motivation! We can do this