School class mums what's ap group

[Cosmoplitain7heaven]

Does anyone else out there find that anything they comment on however bland is completely ignored. Recently sent invite to my little ones birthday party and nothing. My little one is adopted, not that I feel able to or even feel it is fair on my child to share that with them, and this would be their first party something they are so excited about. In the last year they have been to 8 parties and dropped off/posted gifts to those with birthdays who were supposed to have parties during lockdown. I understand people may think we will still be in lockdown but given bday is august could have responded depends on situation to just ignore is rude or am I old fashioned as i am an older mum of a 4 year old. I want to give my child the party they long for as after the abuse and neglect they suffered before entering the care system I want them to know they do deserve it. Anyone else struggled with school mums what's ap group?

August is probably a bit early and people don't know what will be going on then.

Sent invite out as people arranging parties in summer and didn't want to clash with anyone else but yes otherwise would have waited as August is a long way off.

4-6 weeks notice is usually the max for kids parties, most we get are 2-3 weeks. You've asked 4 months in advance.

I wouldn't respond to a generic whole class invite on WhatsApp for a party in August right now. Who knows what'll be happening not lockdown is lifted etc people may want to go away but no one can make plans. If it was a direct invite to me or a smaller group maybe I'd respond with a vague answer but whole class groups are too big to expect every parent to reply

I wouldn’t worry. I would be reluctant to put anything in my diary, in fact, I have no idea where my diary is. Not planning anything feels sooo refreshing.

Well, I think it's rude not even to acknowledge the invitation. Yes, we may be out of lockdown then (????) and plans may change but that doesn't excuse bad manners. YANBU

Think you've just done it too early. Wedding invitations may get sent out that far in advance but kids birthday party invitations are usually 3-4 weeks beforehand.

Nobody knows what restrictions will or won't be in place in August, whether planned holidays will still be going ahead etc, so nobody could give you a definitive answer anyway.

I think perhaps four months in advance is a little premature, although I get that you want to give your DC the best possible party.

Maybe people are waiting to see what happens with lockdown, perhaps people have holidays booked, afterall August is peak holiday season, and they’re waiting to see what will happen with them first.

As an adoptive Mum myself I understand about feeling an outsider. However inviting in April for a birthday in August is quite unusual, especially this year.
(In future anyway I'd try to do a party in term time, either last weekend before break up or first weekend back in Sept. You can try a 2/3 friends in the summer, but parties in summer holidays are likely to be difficult.)

Not really with birthday invites. I’d not reply either as I’d still be nervous about parties at that point. They are talking about children coming in on half days to minimise social contact etc, and social distancing is likely to be a requirement still in August. I would commit until we knew more about our exit plan from Coronavirus.

I wouldn’t reply for an invite in 4 months time either, and certainly not in the current situation. I would probably think something along the lines of. “ wow, she’s optimistic, let’s check in june or so” and forget about it as all i could say in the moment is “ I don’t have a clue”

As others have said the lack of responses is probably due to current situation and the length of time before the party.

I understand not wanting to clash dates with others, but planning this far ahead is tricky at the best of times, and it's almost impossible at the minute. I think it would be much worse if people agreed to come, then had to pull out closer to the time.

Teenplustwenties -thank you. Comforting to hear that as an adoptive mum you feel an outsider too. Thank you.

I think people have so much going on they won’t even be thinking about next week never mind August! Corona is taking such a toll on so many peoples lives I don’t think replying to an invite months away is top of parents priorities! Don’t take it personally!

I also suggest that you pick a date in term

No way would I respond to any party invite for August under normal circumstances never mind now . My holiday in May is cancelled so I hope to go away at some point later in the year but at this moment wouldn’t commit to even a holiday.

In reality no one will prioritise a kids party over there family plans no matter how important it is to your Dd.

I think the party is too early to even think about

I agree about term time holidays . My Ds is sometimes over Easter so we did parties weekend before or after .

WhatsApps used to really stress me out. Because I have 2 dc who do multiple activities, plus I do myself, I'm in lots of groups - I get approx 200 per day. Then a friend told me - you don't have to respond. I've heeded this advice, sorry; made my life so much happier. Most of my groups are currently on 'mute'. I'll look at them if I need to. And it'll probably be once a week or never. Sorry op, I know that doesn't help you.

This year is different but generally you need a party in term time. Trust me! So next year I would do the weekend before they break up.

Try not to worry about it now - people will respond closer to the time. Hopefully a few mums will at least make a note of the date and look out for a follow-up invite when it comes.

Tbh I'd struggle to think of a response that didn't sound like I was brushing you off, or being sarcastic or snotty.

I mean August is months away, I don't even know what I'll be doing in 4 weeks time never mind 4 months time.

Seriously with an August birthday you need to hold the party before schools break up. Everyone I know whose child has an August birthday does this.

Thank you for the suggestions.

I agree with others about holding a party before schools break up. One of my dc has a late August birthday, I try to do something in mid July. It’s a bit weird doing it so early, but the only way to ensure the majority can make it.

I wouldn't have sent a party invite out at the current time. People have absolutely no idea what will be going on, what will or will not be allowed by then. They'll need to see family, friends they haven't seen in months, people may be on holidays, delayed or rescheduled or just previously booked.

I agree though, total radio silence is rude.