An accurate list of Asperger symptoms in adult women? I identify with 99% of Tania Marshall’s list

[Thatone5]

taniaannmarshall.wordpress.com/2013/03/26/moving-towards-a-female-profile-the-unique-characteristics-abilities-and-talents-of-asperwomen-adult-women-with-asperger-syndrome/

I identify with 99% of this so wondering if it is a specific list or so general that everyone will relate to this?

If I have Aspergers, I would say it’s very high functioning Aspergers but hard to tell due to overlap between its symptoms and symptoms of general social anxiety and being intellectual/cerebral.

Don’t really want to go to GP about it as I don’t have day to day issues because of it but just curious really.

Thanks for the analysis on my post Jan , really helped 👍

It was typed in haste while I was cooking, got a bit carried away with it all. I do know e difference between autism and aspergers, as I said in my post, I have a son with autism.

Aspergers falls under the ASD umberella now in certain areas, mine being one of them. It's no longer called aspergers and now called HFA.

I relate to most of the list. I have long since suspected I am autistic, even before ds was diagnosed. I would find getting a diagnosis too stressful so have never pursued it for myself. It was hard enough with ds and he is very, very obviously autistic.

It's no longer called aspergers and now called HFA.

Yes, i know Aspergers isn't given as a diagnosis anymore. But it's not called HFA now, the new ASD classification uses levels to denote severity (which is stupid, oversimplistic and not much more helpful than before). Show me HFA in any diagnostic manual, you can't, because it doesn't exist.
And how can Aspergers be HFA now when the main difference between the two is the lack of or presence of a speech delay?
The main point of the DSM changes was to move away from functioning labels, so with that in mind why would Aspergers be called HFA?

Hmmm! A few things struck me from both websites:

Often have a rigid negative thinking, inflexible black or white thinking style or rigidity of thinking

May have a history of enrolling and attending university classes, followed by dropping out of classes or semesters. Sometime later, she then re-enrolls/attends later on, in life. This is usually due to being overloaded and overwhelmed. A history of deferring exams, not attending classes, dropping out of classes or programs, is common.

May have a history of being unable to cope with work/employment environments, often moving from job to job, especially in younger adult years

May burn bridges (for e.g., walk out or quit jobs or relationships without notice)

Preference for friendships with men as they are easier to understand than women. They also find the interests of their peers boring and uninteresting

Need more time away from people than their peers (solitude)

May experience stress, anxiety, and confusion in social group or group work situations

Others consider her different, odd, eccentric or “weird” by others

Highly Sensitive

Strong hunger may be disrupting her mood and/or the ability to focus

Usually dresses differently from her peers, often eccentric, may dress more for comfort than appearance.

Looks younger than her years

Escapes routinely through imagination, fantasy, and daydreaming

And LOADS more.

Have you tried the AQ test online? The score can be an indication whether it's likely you're on the spectrum or not. The Ritvo test is also good.

I found my diagnosis in my 30s (and it was aspergers, not ASD) hugely helpful in gaining insight and understanding. It's also helped with work too.

Is there a thread or area on Mumsnet for support for adult autistic women/mothers?

If not, is anyone interested in joining one and where should it be based within the site?

Is there a thread or area on Mumsnet for support for adult autistic women/mothers?

Yes, there's a Mumsnetters with SN thread in the SN section.
Go to Topics, then Special Needs

I relate to most of that list but I definitely do not have any form of ASD/ASC. That is such a long and inclusive list that I think most women would relate to much of it.

I believe childhood trauma sometimes presents with the same symptoms as ASD in adult women. So things such as: feeling like you don't belong anywhere, difficulty expressing or understanding emotions, difficulty connecting with others,like or in social interactions, a need for routine, hating surprises, obsessive hobbies, social anxiety etc. may also be trauma related.

I would have said the same a few years ago @Lyndassniff - that I have a whole bunch of autistic traits but DEFINITELY aren’t autistic.

Fast forward a few years and I came to the realisation that I almost certainly am. I just thought it must be normal because I’m normal... right?

I understand what you are saying Haworthia. My lovely DS1 and my equally fab but totally different DB both have a diagnosis of ASD. I have lived in close proximity to someone who has ASD and loved them dearly for my whole life. My point about the list was that it is so long and lists so many different traits, feelings and reactions that most people can probably identify with a lot of it.

For example it says that women with autistic traits might achieve a lot academically, might drop out of education, might change their minds about their educational path, might struggle in school enough to need to repeat a year or may return to education later in life. I think the vast majority of people have probably done one of those things.

I do understand where you’re coming from @Lyndassniff

But equally I see a lot of people on MN listing a whole heap of traits in either themselves or their children but being quite certain that they aren’t on the spectrum. Always makes me think, what makes you so sure? It’s an (understandable) unwillingness to saddle themselves with the dreaded “label” most likely.

That list is huge and contradictory. It's a compilation of lots of autistic women's experience.

A lot of the items are fairly normal feelings / behaviours for NT people too. Don’t focus on the list too much but see if you can look into a private diagnosis when lockdown has finished.

Hi OP

It might be worth going to the GP (once the current situation is over) even if you don't think it affects you day to day.

I have to admit that I made the initial appointment largely out of curiosity. I knew that I had a lot of autistic traits but thought that I wouldn't be taken seriously because the traits didn't seem to affect me day to day and that I was successful in so far as I've got a family, I'm a home owner and I've got a decent job.

It was only the year's wait for an assessment (gave me lots of time for reading and for self-reflection) and the very in-depth nature of that assessment that made me realise how profoundly my autism has affected my life.

I don’t relate to that list that much and I have Aspergers. So don’t think too much about it tbh. It’s a spectrum (I also have combined adhd - notice she mentions the 7 types which I don’t get)

I’m a pretty social person for example, but don’t have friends (only a couple tbh). Might be a learnt/masking skill but if there is one thing lockdown has taught me, I need human contact. I can’t do sitting in the house not talking to anyone.

But there are a lot I do have. And others I don’t lol. Meh.

How do you get an Asoergers diagnosis/assessment if Asperger's doesn't exist any more? I mean it does or does not as much as before, but it's been merged with the ASD. (I know it's not exactly the same as HFA, but that's the closest).

So, going for a public or private assessment, that's not going to result in an Aspergers diagnosis any more.

I wish they hadn't merged Aspergers and autism and made The Spectrum. It's ridiculous. It's like having a "sore lower limb condition" and everybody from those with double amputations to an ingrown toenail are suddenly sharing the same condition, making the term confusing, upsetting (especially for parents whose children have very high needs who are told "My Johnny is on the spectrum too and he just graduated with a first from Cambridge, don't give up hope" type of thing), and almost useless without further description.

It makes it more meaningful because diagnoses are now supposed to be given as autism with... Elaborating on severity of speech delay etc. HFA has never been an official diagnosis. It's very much a made up and often meaningless term.

I have had people tell me that they think I am and I fit alot of the things on those lists. Especially the asexual thing (not the achedemic stuff I was too dumb to even do A levels). I don't see what difference it would make if I was as I still wouldn't fit in or be a confident person.

When Ds was diagnosed last year the letter just said - Autism Spectrum Disorder, nothing else, there were no levels attached to it. He was speech delayed as a toddler but managed just about in school until he got to secondary.

His ASD (we use the D because that was his diagnosis) can make life so incredibly difficult for him. The paediatrician only agreed to assess him because of the impact his difficulties are having on his life. It's also very hard to get any support. Both from school or the NHS. Our local camhs refuse to see autistic children.

He won't go away to Uni like his NT peers because of his difficulties. He has the academic ability but his anxiety, immaturity and sensory issues mean that it would be far too overwhelming for him. There are many children and adults out there that would be considered high functioning that often struggle to function at all.

When I sent DS off to kindergaten at the age of 2y 7m I thought he was 'normal' according to the normal I had experienced growing up.
Any problems I had had I put down to me being "deficient, weak, a bad character etc).

Then I saw DS next to his little mates - an eye opener!!
Now, about 15 years later I know that most of my family (DGM, DF, DM, DB, DN, DS, DD (and me) were / are on the AS and / or the ADD spectrum. Only my DD, DS got early help to be themselves and still make their way in society. The rest of us had to muddle through the best we could.

My DD does not have an autism diagnosis but the (very well thought of) educational psychologist I spoke to said he would have diagnosed her with Aspergers DSM IV. Because girls present so very differently that he previously took an experience based view which wasn’t possible with DSM V. I wonder if girls with what was once Aspergers are falling through the cracks.
Depressingly I had a conversation with the lady who will be her SENCO next year and as soon as I said the word “Aspergers” she cut me off with “Aspergers does not exist”

Prokup it is an eye opener. I had full blown meltdowns as a child, mostly about noise, loud noises, unexpected noises etc. Even now I find noise very difficult to deal with, I just tend to put my fingers in my ears and manage as an adult. My parents dealt with it as bad behaviour though. When I had Ds I started understanding more about sensory difficulties. I sometimes feel sad when I think of how distressed I often was as a child and had no idea why.

Be wary of Tania Marshall's list - she has taken the horoscope approach and mentioned almost anything she can think of to get people to identify.

There are online tests you can do - Simon Cohen's is very good and is backed up with proper research and knowledge.