Am I on a slippery slope towards alcoholism?

[WhatDoIDooDIoDtahW]

I’ve always liked a drink, but I don’t get absolutely hammered. If I go ‘out out’ I can get drunk, but I’ve never liked the experience of being bladdered or hangovers..

However, since buying and moving out with DP I do like the occasional wine or g&t in the evening. My issue is, since DD was born (10 weeks ago) I’ve loved loved having a glass (or two) of g&t every night.

That’s fine, I’m my opinion, but if I’m not going anywhere and DP is home, I’ll have a g&t at 2pm.. then have the occasional one until I go to bed.

So in summary. On weekdays I have a g&t or two in the evening, but on weekends I’m a ‘it’s 5pm somewhere’ type of person.

What brought me to question this is my daughter is only 10 weeks old. I didn’t drink for 4 weeks after her birth. So in 6 weeks I’ve managed to polish off 4 full size bottles of gin and one or two bottles of wine.

The bottles are lined up in my kitchen as I’ve been keeping the bottles to try and use for something creative eventually. But adding another pink gin bottle to the collection tonight made me realise just how much I’ve consumed

Does it matter as long as I’m not drunk every night?

If this is true, I pity your liver.

You’ll get hung on this thread. But, many of us do the same as you. It’s like admitting to eating more cake than you should or driving a little over the national speed limit. yes it’s too much and we know we shouldn’t but so many of us do in secret.

Yes it matters because soon enough your tolerance will increase and you will need more and more to reach the same level of buzz. More importantly as your child grows more and more little everyday common stress will happen and you will find yourself reaching for that gin earlier and earlier. Best to stop now and now walk that path. Congrats on your little one

It's not about the quantity so much as the attitude.

If you 'need' a drink, or say I won't have one today then do, that sort of thing, then you're at risk of getting to a bad place.

Of course drinking a lot is worse for your health but it's the dependency aspect that's the main thing.

And if you're dependent the escalation can be so slow you don't notice/ explain it away.

Sorry I missed the gin bit. That sounds like a lot (coming from someone who drinks every night).

Yes, it does matter. You've started this thread so I reckon you feel that you're on the slippery slope already.
If I were in your shoes I'd be asking my GP, or Midwife for help.
Congratulations on the birth of your baby and I'd definitely look to get some help. Best wishes

Not drunk every night? So are you drunk most nights?

How does it feel thinking about stopping altogether?

So, can you go without. And I mean actually do it, not just say oh I could if I wanted, while pouring a drink.

4 full bottles of gin in 6 weeks is quite a lot. To get through that I guess you might have quite a generous amount of gin. Maybe you should use a jigger when you pour them so that you’re having sensible measures. Cut back without cutting back so to speak.

4 bottles of gin in 6 weeks is a shed load of alcohol. Drinking at 2pm when you’re not out for lunch / doing something different and it’s just a normal day is unusual.

What would happen if you didn’t have a drink? Don’t have one tomorrow and see how you feel. If you’re a bit twitchy about not having one then yes, you’ve got a problem.

Either which way, lay off the gin. The best part of a bottle a week is no good for anyone.

My advice if looking for support with alcohol when you have a newborn is to do it anonymously.

Why are you drinking?

I think that works out at around 22 units per week, so one abs a half times the recommended amount.

I’d say not terrible, but not ideal either.

Here's hoping you aren't breastfeeding at least. I think you need to speak to your GP. You're not on a slope. You're at the bottom. You're waaaaaay over the healthy limit on units. Think of your kid. That much alcohol will have a major impact on your health.

I'm meh on the quantity too

It's the attitude/ dependency that is important to think about

If your dd falls ill after 2 pm will you or your partner be in a position to drive to the hospital or take any proper decision regarding her health.

I have a five week old so totally get the freedom of suddenly being able to drink what you want after pregnancy. I also have really enjoyed having a G&T! Personally, though, I would say you’re probably having a bit too much. I’d try and cut down how many nights a week that you’re drinking, as that seems the most habit forming. I tend to leave it as Fri - Sun, which leaves more nights not drinking than drinking. Otherwise I think it’s quite easy for a drink to change from being a treat nice treat when you do have it, to feeling like you’re depriving yourself if you don’t, iyswim?

Yes its a lot. Yes you're on a slippery slope right now. It's become habitual and something you're finding reasons to have earlier when you feel you can get away with.

Maybe you'll start finding excuses to get away with a little more... or the quantities will slowly creep up more.

I recommend you cut right down. Weekends only.

I say that as someone who slipped very far down that slope and is now sober.

No no sorry I worded that incorrectly. I haven’t been drunk since DD was born. I don’t like the feeling of it, I just have one or two to sort of relax I suppose.

I can safely admit I probably would never completely stop drinking, as we often have games nights with family where it’s drinking and games, but I think if I wanted to I would cut down. I think I could go without for most nights.. but I almost don’t see why I can’t have a drink every night. It wasn’t until I saw the bottles lines up I realised it might be a bit too much. - maybe I just make my gone too strong and get through the bottles too quickly, not any better I know but I can’t believe there’s 4 empty bottles in my kitchen from only about 6 weeks.

I wouldnt say I ‘need’ I drink as such, nor would I be up in arms if I didn’t get my nightly gin. I just have one because it’s there and the tonics in the fridge. I’ll pour myself one while I cook dinner then have one after dinner while we watch telly. I didn’t think that was too bad, perhaps they are just too strong!

I was the same as you. It will get worse because that’s how alcohol and tolerance works.
The book This Naked Mind by Annie Grace saved me. Don’t be like me and not remember a lot do their younger years.

Does your partner drink every night too?

Do you feel like you need a gin every day? Before DS, I'd have a glass of wine a couple of nights through the week then maybe a bottle on the weekends. I felt like if I had a tough day at work, I'd "need" a wine to destress. Now I just don't have the urge to drink whatsoever. I've probably had about the equivalent of 3 bottles in total since he was born 15 months ago. need my wits about me! Why not have a couple weeks off drinking, if you struggle then perhaps you do need to speak to GP/HV for some some help.

What about the 2pm drinks?

There’s a weird puritanical vibe on MN some times which is totally incongruous with the whole ‘mummy needs gin’ thing.

If I buy a bottle of gin it lasts about a week if that. Most people I know are the same. It’s obviously not ideal but I’m never drunk during the week and I have a busy and responsible life.

If you start to find you can’t go without or it’s impacting your ability to function the next day then have a think. But for most of us we run ourselves ragged all day and then self medicate in the evenings 🤷‍♀️

Also, since I’ve made the thread and am actually thinking into it now. I smoked before I was pregnant and quit the day I got my positive test. For the first time since she was born I got a sudden craving for a fag, that was a few weeks ago so I’m wondering if I’m subconsciously substituting the urge to smoke with drinking.

@JulyJune yes, absolutely. My DP doesn’t drink, if he works late I don’t drink until he gets home because I would be mortified if I couldn’t get her (or me) somewhere if I needed to.