Feeling very down, anyone around for a chat?

[isittheholidaysyet]

Feeling very down at the moment, verging on depression.

Just need someone to talk some rubbish with and take my mind off it.

In RL one good friend has been broken by work stress, and is under the doctor for depression and anxiety. Another good friend's marriage is on the rocks, and her DH walked out yesterday. And hasn't returned yet.
I'm not going to put my troubles on them right now.

The other two people I'd likely turn to are also struggling to keep heads above water with work and have too much on for me to load them with more.

DH is working 12 hours today. And the kids are on screens somewhere avoiding me because i keep asking about homework.

No-one is ever on FB at the weekends

I just need to stop my head spinning and stop going down into the darkness.

Talk to me...please

Hi, I don't know if it helps you, but I think about how much people globally really have it worse than we do. It's a version of counting your blessings.

Roof over head, food in house, the NHS, Universal education.

Is there anything specific on your mind?

Thanks.

No not really. There's no rational reason. Like you say, I have a wonderful life.

It's probably hormones or those damned chemical that regulate our feelings.

And a bit of irrational annoyance that I'm always there for everyone, but when I need a bit of support, there's no-one 'cos everyone is in a worse mess than me!

Sometimes it seems everything happens at once , but even when you have your own troubles you can listen and support a friend .. so talk to yours ,, it will at least take their minds off what is going on with them
Is it something in particular ? Or just general meh feeling ? It can be a lonely place thinking everyone is too busy ( thinking husband and kids here )
But you have some free time ( usually rarer than hens teeth ) so grab a book / wine / cuppa and take 20 mins for yourself , if it is possible go and relax in a bubble bath .

I'm just on the edge of tears all the time.

I was round with husband-problem friend last night for 3 hours, and have messaged this morning.

Seen other friend at church and messaged a bit, but that's all she needs at the moment.

I'm an extrovert, so 'me' time (at home -can't leave the kids) generally means me going over stuff again and again in my head till it all gets twisted and blown put of proportion, with no outlet for it. (People to chat to)

I really need a good few hours in a pub with a few nice beers and good company to chat some shit and put the world to rights with.

Ok so it doesn’t sound general tbh what is bothering you ? Are you tired out or worried about a specific thing ?
Yeah that kinda catch up sounds what you need 🙂
Don’t over listen to everyone else .. they would probably be mortified to know that you also needed a listening ear but they did not realise

Recently I've been having these incidents of just feeling depressed for about 2 days, and then being absolutely fine again.

Also sudden extreme tiredness for a day, but a good night's sleep fixes it.

I don't think there's an outside 'cause', but it has made me realise that actually, there is no-one there for me.

I know there are, they say let me know if i can do anything to help,
But what actually can they do?
Nothing really.

Sick of being the driving force behind my family. But not much I can do about that either.

But let's not talk about me.

How the weather where you are?

Anyone done anything interesting last week?

What's for tea?

Hello, I'm having a shit time too, struggling with anxiety but trying to keep going. I started writing a journal where I recorded my thoughts and also something I'm grateful for every day. It's quite therapeutic.

But to answer your questions its bloody cold up here in northern scotland. Last week.....got a new car. Love new car day ha ha. Tea is beetroot/feta/spinach paninis with what we call McDonalds chips (the skinny oven fries). What about you?

Try not not absorb your friends’ worries too much.

I’m watching a pretty sunset from my lounge window. I love this time of year when the sun starts to promise that spring is almost here

I'm sorry to hear that you're suffering too Eddy. Maybe I should start a journal again, but mine usually end up as the 'poor me' book and are quite depressing!

Tea is breaded chicken, mash, carrots and baby sweet corn.
Dc1 and 3 will complain they don't like mash. DC 4 will complain veg exists and they'll all complain that the chicken isn't kievs. They'll eat it though. That's a successful meal in our house!

Weather has been beautiful today, almost warm enough to not take my coat into church, but then I remembered I don't have a handbag and all my stuff is in the pockets!

New car. I hope it's a nice one.

babble

It's been that kind of day here too. The snowdrops are beautiful and the daffs are coming up.

I feel the same, often. It's rotten, isn't it?

It is, grey.

I especially get annoyed by the irrationality of it all.

Hello isittheholidaysyet sorry you're feeling a bit down lately. I know what you mean about feeling miserable from time to time for no discernible reason. When it happens to me I try to go for a walk, out for a coffee or just somethinng anything to break the normal routine. Sometimes though I feel incapable even of that and it does go on for a couple of days.

Here we've been out to late lunch. Come in and DD is doing what ever it is 14 year olds do in their room. DS and DSS are playing chess and I'm sitting on the sofa looking out a clear sky and a full moon. Have to start getting DS (7) ready for bed in a bit. If I let him do it without supervision I'll find him sitting fully dressed with a comic or his tablet in a few hours time

OP is this unusual for you? I mean have you had depressive episodes before?

Just wondering if it could be peri-menopausal? The tiredness and depressive feelings sound a bit like symptoms.

Oh op I just wanted to post and give you a virtual hug .
I think everyone has a shit time every now and again life is hard sometimes.
I feel the same some days , last week my son was ill he has special needs and I didn't know what to do as dh already gone to work and I had no one to stay home with him . Anyway a combination of stress, tiredness I burst into tears . After that I felt better picked myself up , had a word with myself and sorted it out .
If your feeling like this a lot you really need to go and have a chat with your gp .
Remember though please don't keep these feelings to yourself.

It sounds like you’re maybe run down and heading into a mild depressive period? In which case, just focus on the big one :-
Self care (whatever makes you feel calm & soothed like music/dance/books/film/baths/knitting whatever)
Exercise - a little everyday day, just a walk
Outside - go be in nature, little walk
Socialisation - you cant always be a shoulder to cry on, suggest they join you for a comedy night/book club/wine tasting whatever
Food - Cut out sugar, eat fruit & veg & fish & nuts & porridge & eggs, no junk, cutting down carbs helps, just get carbs from fruit & veg only
Water - lots of it, not caffeine, not booze
Sleep - an extra hour a night, go to bed early
Vitamin D, B complex, Floradix tonic, omega 3, magnesium, 5http

Try for 2 weeks, and if no change then I recommend speaking to your dr regarding antidepressants. And book a holiday!

Thanks everyone.

OP is this unusual for you? I mean have you had depressive episodes before?
It's not common, but does happen from
time to time. This time is weird though.

Just wondering if it could be peri-menopausal?
I'm basically presuming that this is what it is.

If your feeling like this a lot you really need to go and have a chat with your gp
Probably should. But that's right old hassle, and I'm sick of them not listening and fobbing me off with stupid diagnoses.

This is really helping though, believe it or not.i'm already feeling the darkness lift.

Hi OP,

Mind if I come sit with you and chew the fat about how generally shit life can be sometimes? I’m a pretty sunny person normally but things are tough at the moment-my thread in chat (paroxetine and alcohol) if your interested in why. If not let’s just talk about something nice. Holidays are my favourite subject-I love the sun and heat-so I’m always trying to cook up nice places to go and keeping to a budget-I reckon I’ve found a flair for it but it seems I may have missed the boat somewhat on becoming an actual travel agent .

Do you all sit together to eat?
Would your dc enjoy silly conversations around dinner? Like ‘would you rather?’ Questions?
How about getting a hug off your dc?

Watch something on tv that you’ll enjoy. Something feel good or comedy.

Could be hormonal, op.

Also be carefull not always being the fixer/ear. If you are not in a good place, it can be draining even though you don't notice in the situation. I'm trying to learn to care less, it's hard when you have always been the fixer isn't it? . Start with your dc, tell them to not comment unless they have something nice to say, and if they continue, they will be making their own food (and mean it). (I truly hope your dc are not toddlers, with this advice ).

Couldn't help smile about your coat vs bag thoughts. I'm not good with handbags so tend to stuff every coat pocket available. I will be out shopping and stand padding frantically at my breast/sides/hips to locate things, also I'm Scandi and often wear big winter coats, when the pockets are fully stuffed, I'm almost circular .

Try breathing exercises, really hope you will feel better soon 💐.

Welcome josh. I would love to travel more. Family aren't so keen.
Any tips for keeping it cheap. I've been trying to encourage camping. But it's not gone down well with the family and the last holiday was not the best. So we are back to self catering I think for this year. Would love to go to France, but it's so expensive.

Mrs
We do sit together at the table and have actually just had an hilarious meal time. 9 year old had the giggles, so teens spent the entire meal trying to make her laugh whilst drinking and spit out her drink.
It's rare they actually engage in this way. So I joined in let it happen.

I got my first handbag about 3 years ago, when I realised I no longer needed a rucksack full of kids stuff. But I tend to work on coat pockets in the winter, handbag in the summer. Spring and autumn I constantly lose stuff!

Sorry missed out tagging you Ilive

Sounds a lovely meal .

I tend to forget my handbag .

Depends on your budget really. We got the first week of summer hols in a caravan in mid France for £1200-that included two cars on the ferry and is for 6 of us. It seems there is an ideal booking time for everything depending on where you want to go-long haul if you are willing to play roulette with where you end up there’s some real bargains to be had 5-6 weeks in advance. But I have to say a lot of what I do is learnt from just keep pricing up different things at different times and see what happens.
Is there any reason the family are not keen on travel?