‘Insulting’ much loved pets abusive?

[Songofsixpence]

DD is horse mad and is very lucky to have her own pony.

Due to the shite weather this winter and resulting mud, poached fields, mud fever, boggy bridleways and a water logged school, pony hasn’t been turned out as much as usual and DD hasn’t been able to ride much so her pony is a bit “fresh”

DD took her to an event last weekend and pony was a bit lively. Nothing dangerous but she pulled some interesting moves, threw in some bucks, did quite a lot of sideways trotting and was generally a bit (lot) over excited

Anyway, was out with a group of friends last night - some close friends and some friends of friends that I kind of know.

One friend also rides and she asked how DD had got on at the weekend, I said fine but pony had been “a bit of a knobber”. Friend replied that her boy had been a complete cock at a similar event the week before.

A friend of a friend was sitting the other side of my friend heard us talking - told us we were abusive, we should be ashamed of ourselves, she felt sorry for our poor animals and that we were just awful and she hoped our horses would find nicer owners who actually cared about them one day - before walking out.

We also have a dog and a cat, they’re all very much loved and well cared for but they are dickheads sometimes - the cat especially

My parents had a steer on the farm whose actual name was Shithead. He was my mum’s favourite and she hand fed him from a baby.

This puts me in mind of ‘Three Men on the Bummel’ by Jerome K. Jerome, about a bicycling trip to Germany in about 1900:
“Germans abuse animals shockingly. I have seen a German stand in front of his horse and call it every name he could lay his tongue to. But the horse did not mind it. I have seen a German, weary with abusing his horse, call to his wife to come out and assist him. When she came, he told her what the horse had done. The recital roused the woman’s temper to almost equal heat with his own; and standing one each side of the poor beast, they both abused it. They abused its dead mother, they insulted its father; they made cutting remarks about its personal appearance, its intelligence, its moral sense, its general ability as a horse. The animal bore the torrent with exemplary patience for awhile; then it did the best thing possible to do under the circumstances. Without losing its own temper, it moved quietly away. The lady returned to her washing, and the man followed it up the street, still abusing it.”

Your friend sounds batshit

Literally 10 mins ago, I was carrying a basket of washing down the stairs and the cat decided that was the perfect time to rub herself around my legs, tripping me up
I called her out for being a dickhead.

I call my rabbit a cowbag when she tries to bite me when I have to take her to the vets. I also call her dumb dumb dodo bun cause sometimes she is stupid. But I love her so much.

She sounds a bit unhinged really. Or not a pet owner?

We’ve just adopted a new rabbit. The woman at the shelter said ‘I should warn you, he’s a bit of a git’. Guess what? A week later and we agree, he’s a total twat (but the cutest little twat)

If calling pets names is abusive, what is torturing your human by never letting them have a night of un broken sleep? What is sinking your teeth into their hand because they touched you for a second longer than you liked? What is sitting on the lid of the only toilet in the house and daring the humans to move you? There is an abusive arsehole in this relationship and it isn't me.

Is your friend of a friend from another country? I think the insulting name calling of beloved animals is quite a British thing.

Jeeees. I'm pretty sure my cats must think their names are Little Bastard and Fuck Off by now

My dog, who has come to work with me since he was 9 weeks old and is very attached and attuned to me and me to him, is a needy attention seeking furry fuckwit. And I tell him such. I've also called him a complete fucking shit bag when he's fucked off across a field or ignored me at agility because he wants to piss about running up and down the tunnel. Doesn't mean I don't love the fluffy dickhead deeply!

Ddog thinks her full name is Fuck Sake Phoebe.

They must be related.

@MashedPotatoBrainz I’m assuming your abusive housemate is of the feline variety?!!
My cat does the exact same thing with the toilet seat

I once called outlet pony a “penis beaker”, I’ve no idea why, I can only think I’d run out of insults
It was terribly Mumsnet

I’m assuming your abusive housemate is of the feline variety?!!

Yes, I have 2. The older female is bag of angry viciousness. Everyone in the house is scared of her. Even the malevolent gargoyle, who flops on the floor and pretends he's dead when she's around.

My dog is an absolute cow - I always introduce her by telling people that she's awful and people pick me up on it by going 'awww, you shouldn't talk like that about the wee....argh argh, get it away....!!!'

So yeah. People like to think all animals are cute, fluffy and can never put a foot, paw or hoof wrong. Until the animal in question puts them right.

Ok ok I'm going to be a knobber now. I know this is all lighthearted...

DH calls my dog "world's worst dog" to his face and I can't bear it! Maybe I'm a snowflake but he's so gentle and looks up as he knows DH is talking about him and it breaks my heart a little bit as he doesn't put a paw out of place but is a bit daft about some things.

My horse I try never to call names anymore as he has kept me safe on many occasions when all he's wanted to do is explode. I have in the past had stand up rows with him effing and jeffing while he reared in my face and I've learned my lesson!

Any 'unwanted' behaviour is always a reaction to something - environment, human error, pain etc so I'm #teamDDHorse on this one seeing as it isn't getting turnout. I think lots of owners are in the same boat at the moment though sadly.

@inwood I loudly denounced everyone I live with, including the kids and dog, as complete dickheads when I arrived at work this morning (very small office, only one other occupant who told me hers were as well today). Very cathartic!

Any 'unwanted' behaviour is always a reaction to something - environment, human error, pain or being evil.

It sounds like she was bored and looking for a reason to leave.

Perhaps she felt left out of the conversation if she's not horsey, or felt jealous if she wants that lifestyle but can't have it for whatever reason.

@MashedPotatoBrainz I’m convinced they haven’t evolved at all from the time they were worshipped as gods by the ancient Egyptians and they expect to be treated as deities by us.

Your friend is a fucking idiot. As someone who has a house and yard full of rescue dogs, cats, ponies and even a hedgehog, please do send her my way and I can acquaint her with what real abuse looks like and the long term effects it has on animals. I have frequently trudged after a pony, muttering, "fucking dickhead" as it does airs above the ground with the wind up its bum. One pony up here is affectionately known as Knobber. We love the bones of him but if someone is going to do something, like escape into the garden and run right through a load of clean, wet washing, it's him! What people like her do not understand is that we love the chaos animals bring to our lives. It's often people like her that claim to love them soooo much, but cannot cope with them behaving, well, like animals, because they anthromorpholise them so much. Is that a word? I hope so.

Insane

My dog is regularly called Dickhead and he is the most spoilt dog in the world.

Your friend would be having a fit of the vapours if she ever heard half of what I called my horse, who would affectionately try to murder me on a regular basis. I chose to interpret it as affection, anyway. . .

I have two horses, giant horse is ok, small pony is an utter arsehole. He doesn't care that he is called an arsehole, in fact I think he's proud of it.

I once threatened him with violence, well sort of, what actually happened was he bucked me off across the fields in front of a group from the very posh local riding school and galloped off, I shouted after him as he galloped off into the distance that when I caught him he'd be sorry.

By the time I caught him I was too out of breath, muddy and sweaty to do anything other than clamber back on whilst he jogged sideways back to his stables.
He's in his twenties 😒

Sometimes ponies are just knobbers. It's a fact of life.

My dog is as thick as shit. I'm not being abusive by any stretch, it is an accurate discription. Infact gets excited to be called silly bitch

Our cat's nickname is CatBastard - because he bites you if you stroke him too much or not enough, or not in the right way. He also picks on the dog - he weighs about 10lb wringing wet, and she is a stocky labrador, but she refuses point blank to walk past him - and he will sit and stop her getting back in from the garden, or through the kitchen so she can get her tea!

Everyone dh works with, knows about CatBastard.

It doesn't mean we don't love him and look after him properly.

I warn people that our cats are malevolent little shits and they never believe me until it's too late and they have been on the receiving end of an attack/other arseholery.