8-legged hairy mofo

[TheSlipperSchlepp]

Just got into bed and my cat sat on the end of the bed, staring intently at my wardrobe..

One of the wardrobe doors is slightly ajar but the position its in means I can't see behind the door into the corner of the room.

I've been lying here wondering what on earth she could be staring at for so long. I could hear the odd faint creak of a coat hanger so automatically assumed someone had broken in earlier while we were out, stayed in the house all afternoon and was now either: hiding in the wardrobe or in the corner where I couldn't see. The things your mind comes up with at 2am in the morning, in the dark, on your own, is amazing!

Then Rational Me thought I could see some dust slowly floating down to the floor. But oh no. It's a hairy 8-legged arachnid freak abseiling down my wardrobe and then back up like some bungee-jumping evil ninja.

I can either:

Wait till the cat gets it and eats it
OR
Gently get a tissue, then light it and burn the house down.

What would you do? Suggestions most welcome, I'm not going to be doing any sleeping for quite a while...

I vote

"Take off and Nuke it from space , it's the only way to be sure"

We can’t help you until you furnish us with a photo or a diagram.

A cat pic will do!

I believe the standard Mumsnet advice is to burn your entire house down.

Oh god please no photos of IT. shudders

It just wants to cuddle with you in your bed, will creep up under the duvet to be close. Sweet dreams 😂

The spider boiiiinged when it got to the bottom

Oh ffs, it's on the fucking CEILING

10/10 for diagram.

I thought we had a few weeks until the spiders start roaming the house again. Apparently not. Good times.

Aaaw that’s a cute cat! And a very big angry spider!

Who ate who in the night?

Is your bedspread magenta? If so, it doesn’t exist.

Leave it be and it'll keep any bugs at bay!
I may be biased though as on my home desk beside me I currently have 10 tarantulas and 2 jumping spiders.

@PixieRabbit 😆no it's not, I just liked that colour on the palette choices. I can however confirm my cat is black and white, the spider was black. I may have used artistic license in using red & yellow for the spider's bungee jump rope.

I ended up decamping to my eldest daughter's bedroom as she was out at her boyfriend's house. I had about 3 hours sleep. I'm exhausted. No idea if spider succumbed to one of my cats or not.

Here is Starey Cat

Oh dear, I bet you’re knackered.

For what it’s worth, I think spiders are a good thing.

Last year there was a terrifyingly angry wasp in the bathroom when I went for a late-night wazz. I shut the door on my way out.

The next morning I went back in to find the beastly wasp had blundered into a spider’s web, to meet a sticky end.

And that is why I never do any dusting. Well that’s my excuse.

Aaaaaaaw he’s gorgeous!

Wait! You don't know where it is now??? Are you still going home tonight?

You do know it's already made itself a sandwich, used the butter knife in the jam and is now eating it in your bed don't you?

I’m very late with understanding the starey/stairy cat pun.

This has made me laugh , thank you .
I removed and built a new wardrobe last week I think there about 6 spiders waiting to gang up on me now for been a home wrecker

And that is why I never do any dusting. Well that’s my excuse.

Don’t get rid of those fragile-looking spindly ones that hang out in the corners of rooms either. They eat the massive, hairy spiders for dinner! (Sure I read that on here).

But those spindly ones are the worst, they're sinister and conniving and bounce if you go near them.

Bastard! Tell it to come back on 1st September

There are options....just saying...

There was a spider, at least 10 inches in diameter (no lie ), in one of the kitchen baskets earlier. I convinced my 4 year old to carefully place the basket outside as an act of kindness to the poor gentle spider... I can't quite believe I was willing to sacrifice my first born.

But those spindly ones are the worst, they're sinister and conniving and bounce if you go near them.

What kind of spindly ones do you have!? If you cough in their direction they tend to get swept halfway across the room!

I once woke up to one of them crawling across my face though That wasn’t pleasant.

@LordGarmadon
Don’t blame you. Kids are expendable but arachnophobia is serious.