Ex asking for my help to get new house

[UncommonUsername]

I have no idea where to post this, sorry if this is the wrong place.

I have two daughters with my ex, he has just had another baby with his wife. He lives in a two bed council flat and wants to move to a three bed council house, the problem is he only has our children two nights per week.

He's asked me to write a letter to the council telling them he has the kids three nights per week because according to him since he gets no child benefit or tax credits for the kids he has to have me vouch for him. I don't want to lie for him but I am worried that he'll start kicking off over it if I don't, I don't want to give him anything in writing to say he has the kids more than he does because surely he could use that to his advantage when it comes to the kids money?

He doesn't pay any child maintenance for them and never has and we haven't always gotten along since we split I just don't trust him to not try and mess things up for me.

I guess I'm asking what anyone else would do in my situation?

Tia.

No. Just no.

By doing that can he use it as evidence towards being awarded any of your child benefit etc?

Why does he not pay towards them...

No fucking way. He’s not your friend, he’s a bully. Why would you lie for him? What would “kicking off” look like? He has no right to threaten you. Is he working? Have you opened a claim with the CMS for the money he owes your children? If you’re not pursuing child support because he’ll be unpleasant if you do, then I’d go for it anyway as he’s already being a dick.

Tell him to go fuck himself

Why would you help this "man"?

No way. It could really mess up your entitlement to child benefit etc. And also it's fraud. He can kick off as much as he likes - he can't make you do it. Say no, and keep saying no.

Dont do it but if you think he will kick off tell him you have done it

Ring them personally and tell them he only has them x amount of times a week and you would prefer it if he didnt know you told them that

No no no no no.

Why does he pay no maintenance? Does he work?

If you don't get along anyway, let him 'kick off'. And maybe tell him - actually I'm already supporting you and your wife financially as you pay nothing for our children. If that's not enough for you and you're going to kick off at me, I might as well go to CMS.

Absolutely fucking not.

And why isn't he paying maintenance?! Get on to cms. Immediately. Cheeky fucker

Ha ha ha. No.

The thing about being divorced is that you don't have to worry about him kicking off any more. What's he going to do?

Isn't it about time you put in a CMS claim?

Funny how instead of actually having his children for 3 nights to deserve a bigger house his instinct was to stick with 2 nights but get you to lie for him in writing to the government. Can't imagine why you split

He sounds like a total arsehole! Why does he not pay for his children?

Say you were to write the letter, how could it come back and bite you on the arse? The only reason I would consider it is so that your dc will have their own room when they go to stay. If his wife has just had a baby then it may get a bit overcrowded when it comes to bedrooms. This is in no way your problem I know, I’m just wondering if there is no down side for you, would you consider it to make life nicer for your dc when they’re round there. What could he do to mess things up for you?

That's what I'm worried about that he will use it as evidence towards claiming part of the child benefit and tax credits.

Him kicking off is never pretty I've had him arrested in the past for violence and when we first split he refused to give the kids back etc. That's the reason he doesn't pay maintenance, in the past when I tried to bring it up he told me if I tried to claim it he'd go for full custody and made a load of other threats so I always thought it was easier to just leave him to it.

And yes he works full time.

Nooooo!

Why haven’t you gone to the cms for maintenance?

Seriously claim CMS you have all the evidence that the DC live with you!

Go to the CMS. He won’t get full custody.

Tell him that if he wants to spend more time with his children then you will facilitate this (if it's safe to do so), then there will be no need to lie.

Do not do it.

He could use it as evidence to claim child benefit and tax credits and go to the CMS & claim money off you for child maintenance. Do not do it.

But definitely go to CMS and start a claim against him.

He’s not going to get your dc full time, what will his reasons be? I don’t see any judge disrupting the established child contact just so your ex wants a larger council house.

He’ll just need to work harder and scrimp and save or stay where he is.

No no and no, it's fraud and you could get in a lot of shit if found out.

Plus go to the cms for Cm, I know it's scary. He'll never get full custody with a record of dv, plus if he kicks off just phone the police again

Based on your latest update, don’t do it Op. In my post, I was asking as I had no idea how it can affect child benefit, tax credits etc.

Now you have split do not give in to threats.

Does he even want to see the girls twice a week? Who organises it?

I agree. If he kicks off, call police and tell them.

He has no chance of full custody if you are the primary carer and he's been arrested to violence against you! He's bullshitting.

Go to cms, and don't even think about writing him a letter which he could absolutely use to go after your benefit.

Why would you do this man any favours after the way he has treated you. He is an ex for a reason. The fact that he doesn't pay child support and expects you to do this is outrageous.

Definitely do NOT do it. Bloody cheek and he doesn't even support his children. He should be paying maintenance for them. Get what you are entitled too.