The most annoying yet commonplace Facebook status updates?

[Firecracker2019]

'And just like that, she/he was 1/2/3/4 (76?!)' when announcing a child's birthday

'Leg/arm/chest (ego?) day' usually with a generic gym shot and / or photo of body part referred to.

'Cheeky little (alcoholic drink name)? Don't mind if I do!' with photo of alcoholic drink

'This boy / girl / kid / guy / gal!' And a photo of that person. And that's it.

A massive long list of more things than anyone however efficient could realistically fit into the waking hours of one day, followed by, 'and relax..!'.

'Nom Nom' and a photo of some food.

I posted a 'so proud of my dc for passing his driving test' yesterday . Is this allowed in the big book of miserable fuckers ? I am proud, what should i be posting?

Stupid quotes by people with delusions of grandeur, such as 'throw me to the wolves and I'll return as the leader of the pack.'

Youve been unemployed for the six years I've lived in the area, and you can't even be arsed to get up and take your kids to school. Works at 'full-time mummy' and can't even clean your house. Yeah, you're leading no packs, dickhead.

‘Be kind’ posts and anti bullying posts from girls that beat me up at school.

Even more ironic is these girls liking the posts now doing the rounds calling out these types.

Post what u like. Other people find it slightly annoying. That's all that's being said here. Different opinions thats all

Oh I love the achievement of DC posts!!!! It's great seeing friends children hot milestones.

I am however, not a huge fan of the back to school in front of the door photos, but I suspect in 5 years I'll be doing it, so can't really complain. I just scroll on by.

Honestly, yeah i have all of the above on social media. I love all the people on there. What harm are they doing? If you don't like it, delete them. Stop being a judgemental twat.

@Sunnydaysrock 🖕🖕🖕

So... this happened (followed by pics of totally predictable event)

@Nirvana1979 you ok hun?

The people sharing posts of lost cats/ dogs which went missing in 2005 and bonus points if the caption says update darling has been found thanks for the support

The ones that are annoy me are the ones where they post the happy birthday/ remembrance post for when some died gushing about them when you know that they didn't bother with/ like or see the person

The ones where they going on about supporting mental health/be kind when you know for a fact they were downright nasty to people who did struggle with mental health - this one happened to me personally.

Or the ones where they say they are angry/annoyed/fed up but don't say why and then people ask and they respond with "I'll PM you"

Attention seeking posts are so annoying.

Climate change posts by people who have a profile picture of themselves under their patio heater

'Boy done good', 'girl done good' or whatever variant of that...

Just had a scroll through my FB and the only thing that stood out to me is the current fad for describing your pet as a 'furbaby'.That makes me want to vomit. Why you can't just say 'the dog' anymore is beyond me.

@Fedupwithmyhouse

Delete the bitches!! Why would you have them on your Facebook if they beat you up at school?! Seriously- delete them from your Facebook feed and your life!

Absolutely fucking fed up with all the hypocrisy surrounding the death of Caroline Flack.

Oh god... the if you care at all about x cause/disease you’ll cut and paste this otherwise you don’t care about me at all, or the ones where they’ll post a cryptic message so everyone goes are you ok hon...no reply. Can’t be arsed with the drama.
No one is saying you cant be proud of your kids but proud and smugger two different things

Smug!

"Proud of my DC" ones are fine if it's an actual achievement and you don't post it every day. They get irritating when it's a daily thing and full of mundane stuff.

I've a SIL who posts endless photos of what she does with her kids. They go for a McDonald's, we get 10 photos and a gushing status about their great day out. Last summer she posted almost 1000 photos over the course of the school holidays (loads of them blurred, or identical - like 20 shots of the same beach)!! Like, does she actually think anyone is looking at them?!

This makes me glad I've got less than 20 people on my fb.

When people write big long paragraphs to (about) their children who aren't on social media (because they're little children)...... happy birthday/congratulations etc (name) you are so loved, so special, we're so proud of you you're my world etc. I always just think they're not reading this go and tell them to their face, although obviously everyone wouldn't hear about their achievements that way.
Humble-bragging
Yes to the above about hospital check ins then no explanation.

This face, though...

My leg was amputated, and it's my 18th birthday. I bet not one person will share!
(Everybody's Nan instantly shares)

Handbag lost on 64 bus in Truro.

When people wish their OH (WHO THEY LIVE WITH!) happy birthday....just roll over in bed in the morning and say it to them instead.

AhoyMrBeaver I genuinely laughed out loud at your post

Oh, also the terrible poems about "the good old days" (usually including how the kids got a smack when they misbehaved, so were all angelic, and how women didn't have to go to work and were able to stay at home and enjoy doing the laundry), with a load of people commenting about how it must have been so great back then.

Also, when someone posts about their recent "good deed" (usually with a vague attempt to disguise it as a post full of concern for homeless people or something) and then people say things like "That's so nice of you, good to see there's still some decent people around these days" as if the streets are 99% full of criminals.