Innocuous conversations that you have overheard that have stayed with you...

[drownininplaymobil]

When my dc were pre-schoolers, I was in some toilets in a church, wrestling various small humans with their pants/handwashing etc.
A student (I think) came in and said to her friend "My hair felt weird so I thought I'd come and have a look at it in the mirror".
I can remember at the time wondering when the last time was that I had time to look in a mirror other than when I was brushing my teeth. And slightly resenting the fact that this gorgeous young thing had the freedom to just saunter about noticing how her hair 'felt'.
Such a small throwaway comment but it really stuck with me. Anyone else?

😆

@muscatelgrapes London's lovely Hammersmith. It does have its good points though!

Many years ago on holiday in Italy with my husband, we were all eating together with the other guests at the small hotel. A huge plate of grapes were put on the table for the pudding course. A small American boy near me asked his Mother " Where's the treat Mommy?" " The grapes are the treat darling" she replied. I felt just as disappointed as the small boy and we still quote that exchange when my husband tries to tempt us with fruit rather than anything more exciting!

On a coach last year a girl behind dh and I was chatting on the phone about the sexual escapades of her friend for some time.

The conversation then moved onto having a Hollywood wax and she said to her friend, "I'd like to try it but I have really corse pubic hair so I think it'd hurt."

"I don't know why they say you can't eat on the toilet, I do it all the time"

On holiday at a holiday park, eating lunch in the onsite ‘restaurant’

A couple with their offspring sat at the next table after ordering. On the menu were a selection of things you could either have made up in a wrap OR as a panini.

A young waiter delivered the order and we heard the woman have a bit of a discussion about it not being what she ordered. It ended up her saying she would just have it because she didn’t want to be waiting for food whilst the rest of her family ate. The waiter left and the woman spent several minutes ranting to her DH about how it was okay for him, he got what he wanted..... “I wanted a pah-narn-e, I didn’t want a wrap. I ordered a pah-narn-e, I can’t believe they messed it up and didn’t make my pah-narn-e.....”

God knows what other shoppers think of us in when I ask DH in the bread aisle if he wants any pahnarne’s this week.

Many years ago, a woman with a little boy passed by me on the street and he must have been yakking his head off (in the manner of small children) because all I heard as she walked by was a muttered "I wish you'd have mouth failure"

@potterycat

I left my sandals on a holiday in Cornwall a week before my parents were going to the same area so we agreed with the farmer (an actual farmer, I'm not being rude about the Cornish!) they'd collect them.

On the agreed morning, my mum telephoned to check it was still ok and to say they'd be there in half an hour, to which the farmer repeated back "aaaaf an oooour?!"
Now that's how we all say half an hour, for any reason 🤣

There was a Sportacus ride on outside the supermarket and DS was having a massive tantrum about not being let on it, he was throwing himself on the ground yelling "I wanna ride on Sportacus, I wanna ride on Sportacus" and I was all composed until a woman walked past and said loudly "don't we all, love"

“I desperately want to know where this fiesta of robbers and psychopaths is!” Pretty sure it’s the town I’m currently living in!

“American tourists in Windsor asking a taxi driver to take them to 'Sluff'.” To be fair place names can be a bugger if they’re not familiar to you especially British ones.

Scots ones in particular we often hear non Scots inc other brits mangling fuck outta them!

How many of you (non Scots miners) can correctly pronounce:

Tighnabruich
Ecclefechan
Milngavie
Culzean
Kirkcaldy
Kirkcudbrightshire

?

And there’s similarly tricky place names especially in wales and Northern Ireland.

And there’s also the same in USA, Brit’s often mispronounce

Arkansas
Baltimore
Banquete
Amherst

Etc there’s loads!

@chickenwing brilliant!

“I've often wondered if it caused them to sign the pledge ...”
As someone who’s done MANY journeys to Scotland from England by train that really tickled me!

@curlyhairedassassin - my dd doesn’t like chocolate or chips I’m sure when she was younger I was overheard telling her if she wasn’t good I wouldn’t be buying her coleslaw/beetroot/Edam/emmental/carrots...

All of which were particular favourites at various points!

@QueenOfOversharing The first one, they were talking about a project i was working on. The second one was along the lines of cologne4711, just going on and on about me. : ) So both times easily verifiably about me.

I was trying not to add this because I've shared it a few times over the years and it may out me, but --

Once on the bus I overheard two women who worked together and were a bit tipsy, just coming back from a happy hour.

A: "Jack???" in shock.
B: Nods slowly with a smug smile and says, "Bar none."
A: "Jack, from accounting????
B: Several slow nods, smug smile, "Bar none."
A: "Jack??? Short Jack??"
B: smug smile, more slow nods, repeats "Bar none."
A, "Bald, fat Jack?"
B, Nods, repeats "Bar....None," emphasis on "none."

I guess short, bald, fat Jack from accounting is surprisingly good in bed....

Love these

I overheard 2 students (1 white 1 dual heritage) discussing an acquaintance, “I always thought she was a bit racist ‘cos all her kids are white”. We spent weeks teasing out the threads of meaning in that.

Travelling abroad with English friends.

Waiter in restaurant: "are you English"
Me: "no, I'm Scottish"
English friend: "Does it matter, it's the same thing'
Me: 😱 yes, of course it matters! Are you happy to be called Scottish, Irish or Welsh if you are English?
Friend: er, no.

My downstairs neighbour had a regular visiting friend. Both women had jorkies....Jack Russell crossed with a yorkie and they were siblings.

My neighbours friend said in a very loud voice when talking about the dogs "Well his father should have been a schnauzer!!" I know this is the incorrect spelling! But I thought my mother was going to die laughing

Hang on @Graphista how is one supposed to pronounce Baltimore???

I a park with my DC and overheard a yuppy Mum say “His name is Orpheus (but she pronounced it “orfaaayyuss”. The other mother said “Is that like Orpheus? The Greek name?” To which the original mother said “Yeah but we changed the pronunciation so it sounds more Greek.”

In a park, not I a park

Youngest brother on holiday in Crete, floating in his lilo chatting to a man at the side. ‘Where are you from?’

Germany

Thoughtfully floating for a moment...

‘Were you in the war?’

The man was late twenties 😂

The other I can remember is me and my sister in our garden loudly stating ‘i hope daddy doesn’t tie us up again’ (we’d discovered Houdini and the current favourite game was escaping being tied up and I hope it doesn’t really meant I hope he does! As children do)

Neighbour overheard. Called the police and social services. That was an interesting conversation!

StoneofDestiny That reminds me of, not a conversation, but a newsreader on the radio when I was on holiday in the USA:

"... the new vaccine is being developed at the University of Cardiff, Wales, England."

I was in hospital and next to me was a really sweet old lady. She had a constant stream of visitors during visiting hours - seriously, 6-8 people per day, always different.

I caught enough of the conversations to know that she had travelled across the country to attend some sort of Christian conference and while there she fell down a flights of stairs and shattered her pelvis. The local church set up a rota for visitors and she didn’t know any of them.

One day she said “god must love me so much to send all these lovely people to take care of me”

I was really taken aback as to me, if I travelled for a religious conference and while there shattered my pelvis, I’d think god had it in for me quite a bit.

Made me think a lot about perspectives and I’ve never forgotten it.

Oh TheMemoryLingers - I wish that conversation was a one off, but it's pretty regular in various guises.
Recently on holiday abroad an English tourist told our tour group he worked in 'air despatch'. Oh said a Canadian, I regularly send packages from my firm to Prestwick airport.

Yes said English man, that is in the north of England! 😱

No, said I, it's in Scotland, and it's claim to fame was Elvis Presley's visit there.

How many of you (non Scots miners) can correctly pronounce

Not sure about Ecclefechan so looked it up and it's exactly how I would have pronounced it. How on earth do English people pronounce it?

Anstruther would have got me. Mind you we have silly pronounciations in England too like Althorp and Towcester.

See also "John Menzies" and "Dalziel & Pascoe"

Hang on hmm @Graphista how is one supposed to pronounce Baltimore???

I’m assuming you’ve never watched The Wire 😬

When I was younger I thought there was another place in America called Arkinsaw, separate to Arkansas.

Why the hell is it pronounced like that anyway?!