Builders wrote horrible disablist word on my van.

[ArseholeBuilders]

NC for this. I'm pissed off about this and am fantasising about revenge.
A house a few doors down from mine is being renovated, so there has been a builders van parked outside on the street. The other day I came home for lunch and parked for half an hour before heading back to the office. Our street is difficult to park on and the only space was directly behind their work van, so they way I was parked meant they couldn't open their back doors. That's the way it is on our street, it's very congested with parked cars so you park wherever you can find a space. Also I was parked outside my own bloody house.
Of course they still had access to the side door, but they must have got pissed off at the inconvenience because when I got to work I noticed the word 'spastic' written in large letters I. the dirt on the back of my work van. (Sorry, it is a truly horrible word and one I would never use, and any decent person would say the same) I'm 99% sure it was one of them because I saw them throw me a filthy look when I got out the van, and that word most definitely was not there when I parked as I checked the back to make sure I'd left a couple of feet clear behind me. I really can't imagine any of my neighbours doing that. Most were either at school/work and those who weren't are quiet and pleasant retirees.

If it had been a swear word or a rude drawing it wouldn't seem so bad. It's the fact they used such a vicious word that upset me. their van has no logos or company names on it so I've no idea who they are. I've checked their reg for tax and MOT and they're all up to date.

I should probably let it go, and there's probably not much I can do, but I have to admit I've been daydreaming about getting revenge on those little shits. Any ideas? nothing harmful or illegal of course.

They were trying to work and you blocked access to the back doors of their van. That was unacceptable, regardless of whether there were any other spaces.

I agree you need to let it go. You made someone angry and they lashed out. They didn't scratch your vehicle, they wrote something that could be washed off. You don't like their language? Well they don't like your parking. Both actions class as fairly antisocial IMO.

MrsJBaptiste that is an appalling analogy and you cannot be so ignorant as to not know that. Of course I would not block a van’s doors in a disabled space and it’s nowhere near the same thing as an obligation to leave a space empty behind every van I see. I drive a VW Caddy which needs a bit more than the conventional space to open its boot, tough luck for me, I don’t expect others to leave me an extra parking space. I also have to get my DD’s wheelchair in and out of there when she is using but she doesn’t have a blue badge (rightly so as her wheelchair use is very intermittent and we can cope around it). And yet I still don’t expect the world to accommodate me.

Yep as I suspected, so many people on mn think the word spastic is a totally acceptable insult and using it is an acceptable reaction to something that irritates someone.
Nice

I am very impressed that the Builders can spell that well!

They weren't unable to access their van...... they just had to use the side doors. Obviously a lot of the above posters aren't capable of processing that part

Op, I'd tell a white lie and say it had been caught on dash cam. 🤥😏

Insane responses on this thread!

Vile word, their behaviour was totally unacceptable.

A lot of people equate 'Twat' and 'Spastic' as being much the same level of insult in my experience. Don't agree myself, but do think that's the case.

Wash your vehicle?

@missyB1exactly.

Suspecting we've got quite a few folk on here who also think Donald Trump is a really great guy.

There really are two types of people.

@Ofthread
Yeah it’s really quite depressing.

OP, you parked fine, of course you could park there if they could get out. Why in somewhere with limited parking would you leave them enough space to access their back doors? That’s for them to sort out if they want to.

1.You parked inconsiderately.
2.You have no idea who wrote the word.
3.You are making assumptions based on a "dirty look".

Just leave it.

This 100% ^

And don't be so silly missyB1

@WorraLiberty Would you think she was being silly if someone had written the N word on there?

Do people call the police or go knocking on random people's doors because of what's written or drawn on dirty vans? Does that happen in RL or only in MN posts?
I've never heard of anyone doing that in RL.

‘Spastic’ is a terrible word to my generation (in my 40s) and one we would never use.

However, I hear my kids’ friends bandy it about (mostly ‘spaz’) constantly.

The youth of today generally don’t know its perjorative connection.

Some adults, however, take everything far too seriously. You park like an inconsiderate twat, you run the risk of a consequence.

WorraLiberty Would you think she was being silly if someone had written the N word on there?

My post totally whooshed you. missy said....

Yep as I suspected, so many people on mn think the word spastic is a totally acceptable insult and using it is an acceptable reaction to something that irritates someone.

She's being silly because literally no-one on this thread has said the word spastic is a totally acceptable insult.

Just as the N word wouldn't be either.

It was a horrible thing to write, but it’ll wash off. I’d feel the same about any word.

As for all the people lacking in imagination - builders can’t get everything out of a side door! Especially not long lengths of stuff or heavy machinery that’s at the back.

It’s just incredibly inconsiderate to park behind a working tradesman’s van. It’s not their fault the homeowner doesn’t have a suitable driveway to park on so they can work from their van. And no it’s not always practical to get everything out of the van that they’ll need for the whole day - be sensible.

Dick kids of today definitely DO know and understand the word spastic is acceptable. We knew it but when I was growing up it wasn't treated as seriously as it is now.

The kids who call my ds spastic are doing so precisely to bully him.

Unfortunately there is still a hierarchy with protected characteristics in social and moral opinion but in law there is no discrimination.

If a child in school calls someone the n word or made homophobic or transphobic comments the punishment is always instant and severe. But with disablist language it's still excused (as you did) and rather than teach the children it's from and punish severely to make the point from the off it's handled in a wishy washy way.

My poor dad gets really upset with ds medical reports stating about his spasticity because he still remembers the way the word was used as an insult back in the 80/90's when he was teaching secondary. We should have moved forwards not backwards from this.

As for all the people lacking in imagination - builders can’t get everything out of a side door!

Exactly. A lot of work vans have a shelving unit at the side, so access to the actual large space is through the back doors only.

Surely if the builders needed back door they had options?

A) ask their employer (neighbours) if they know who's van it is.
B)knock on residents doors to ask if it their van.
C) pull forward out of the space and remove the materials and reverse back in?

I don't think the acceptable response was to write disablist language on someone's van that will then be driven around town offending many innocent members of society.

And I don't think if they'd written other types of hate crime words people would be so accepting and blaming the OP.

Why did the OP park inconsiderately? Should we all park in such a way that anyone with a van can open the back doors?
Not for every van, no, but when a van is only parked there because its owners are doing work for our neighbour - yes.

If the builders want to have permanent, guaranteed access to their back doors they should park on a driveway.
Yay, Mumsnet Bingo!
A land where every home has it's own driveway ...

A van with its doors open would take up most of two parking spaces and why are the builders entitled to two parking spaces?
Because they need access via those doors in order to complete the work they are contracted to do in the street they are parked on. You know - that street which maybe doesn't have an exclusive driveway per home?

I would approach the builders directly and ask them if they wrote this disablist slur on your van.
Riiiiiight ... of COURSE you would @Booboostwo.
Might be safer to just shout it from your sweeping drive though.

Nobody knows for sure that it was the builders. It could have been anyone.

Is there a chance it had been written before and you hadn’t noticed.

I can’t see why a builder would let you walk past them without saying something, if they needed to get something out of there van.
Perhaps you where feeling a little guilty for parking the way you did, although it sounds fine to me and you where on the lookout for ‘trouble’ when you returned to your car.