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If WW3 kicked off, and you were forced to enlist, do you think you'd cope?

228 replies

BaubleTheLumpOfCoal · 04/01/2020 21:25

I 100% wouldn't.

I've looked at the army website and the fitness levels they require alone are way above my baseline level (out of breath when running up stairs Grin)

I'm very small and weigh 6 and a half stone, so would probably be a liability to my fellow troops.

How do you think you'd fare?

OP posts:
managedmis · 06/01/2020 00:53

I'm 37, am I allowed in?

Bunnyfuller · 06/01/2020 00:53

And the Armed Forces aren’t all ‘infantry’ jobs.

I was a Russian Interpreter.

And they already have a hefty commitment to military drone use.

LucaFritz · 06/01/2020 00:54

God people from the first two world wars would be howling with laughter and crying with horror at this thread Hmm you think they didn't have eye sight problems or disabilities back then! ❄❄❄❄❄

Youvebeenmuffled · 06/01/2020 01:12

I’m that lazy if I was in a ditch with folk shooting at me, I think I’d just shoot myself. Cba getting all out of breath and sweaty and scared to then most likely die anyway.

Always fascinates me in films when people try to outrun dinosaurs, you’ve no chance, just be eaten.

Aurignacian · 06/01/2020 01:29

I wouldn’t pass muster. I’m slim but not particularly fit. I think I would be too old anyway, thankfully. I wouldn’t cope well with any sort of war tbh, would any of us?

Graphista · 06/01/2020 02:03

Nope!

Very poor eyesight, even with glasses, poor hearing, Asthma,
Fucked spine...

But above all certified nuts!

Currently housebound due mainly to the mental health stuff. On the other hand insomnia and an ocd dx mean I’m less susceptible to being vulnerable to sleep deprivation and I can be extremely stubborn/fixated on things and can focus on reciting poems/essays etc when anxious so would do that if interrogated.

Half my family are military so it’s sort of the family business I considered joining up and was rejected on medical grounds. (The Asthma - I thought I might scrape in but didn’t)

I can shoot in terms of accuracy but would need a refresher course and I think I’d really struggle mentally with shooting at actual people, I was a guide then guide leader and did loads of camping, hiking etc as a kid so that side I’m familiar with but my back would be screwed meaning i wouldn’t be able to walk for several hours the day after sleeping on the ground

Ex nurse so have medical knowledge though again very outdated especially on trauma care.

But I think I’d probably be of use on the admin side if they were open minded and technologically equipped to accommodate me. I’ve worked for the mod before and know the score as it were and I can still remember all the info. But it’s highly unlikely that they would entertain this.

Regarding current fitness levels required my relatives that are/were military are always saying its MUCH easier than it was in their day, some parts they are able to directly compare (times for runs etc) so factually correct but they’re also basing it on their observation of fat/unfit new recruits which they say wasn’t the case when they joined as people with those physiques wouldn’t have managed the fitness tests.,

@darkriver19886 if you’re genuinely interested mod civil service always recruiting. That includes IT & comms support

“If you're not technologically minded, how could you help?” There are SO many roles that are important in peripheral support areas - logistics, general admin (record keeping is massively important), catering, engineering, mechanics...

I am good on lateral thinking and problem solving so possibly a bletchley park type? I do loads of puzzles every day from crosswords to logic puzzles to quizzes and anagrams so I’m good at that kind of thing always have been. While I don’t have knowledge of non European languages at this point reckon i could learn, I can speak 3 languages confidently and a further 3 less confidently at the moment.

“wars need good administration, HR, infrastructure, supply/logistics, medical services, catering, procurement, intelligence... by the sounds there's plenty of skill here!” Well said.

Thanks to all on thread who are serving/have served.

As an ex army brat and ex army wife and as I say loads of other family who’ve served across all the branches I know from that perspective it’s not an easy job by any means. Even in supposed “peace time” (which I think is often forgotten).

Dd LOOKS fit and healthy but is also asthmatic and has EDS so cant run more than a few paces without dislocating something!

But again her work experience and aptitude’s mean she’d likely be of use in civil service IT, admin or comms or like me she’s a good and much quicker problem solver she’d be good in intelligence or big picture logistics even.

Interesting a lot of posters focusing on nuclear warfare and I’m guessing you’re around my age and so were teens/twenties during the Cold War?

My understanding is warfare has moved on.

I think it could quite possibly be biochemical with genetically engineered weapons especially if there appear to be clear genetic differences between belligerents, so as to “only” kill “the enemy” and limit damage to food and water etc

“I thought it was just men who got forced to go?!” Absolutely not! Women were conscripted too.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/history/british/britainwwtwo/womennatwarr01.shtml

In December 1941, the National Service Act (no 2) made the conscription of women legal.

JamieVardysHavingAParty · 06/01/2020 02:41

I would think I'd be a liability, as I get left and right mixed up under pressure. You wouldn't want to be anywhere near an armed me in a crisis situation. Grin Friendly fire, here we come

In peacetime, I'm medically barred from joining up.

Could be useful admin-wise though, as I read and write multiple languages.

LovelyBrick · 06/01/2020 02:58

I'm type 1 diabetic so they wouldn't want me...also I'm a pacifist so would refuse to fight.

Mimishimi · 06/01/2020 03:37

Nope, have friends from all those countries they want to destroy, including Israel. So depressing.

Mimishimi · 06/01/2020 03:47

Missillusioned - I think that is a big part of why they are panicking. The cannon fodder class gave up on them** when we realised they were all in cahoots at the top

ChristmasArmadillo · 06/01/2020 03:55

I imagine I would, we’re a military family, but I’m exempt due to something arbitrary that doesn’t even affect my daily life.

AmelieTaylor · 06/01/2020 08:59

Assuming this hypothetical question relates to a hypothetical war similar to WW2...

If they get so desperate they need me, we are all very definitely fucked.

But to answer your question... would I cope?

Too many variables to answer your question really, but I guess it would depend what they needed me to do. Decoding - yep. Shooting someone - no.

All in all, if they need me, we are absolutely fucked

HigherFurtherFasterBaby · 06/01/2020 09:02

They don’t want my drugged up arse on the battle field, that’s a fact. My MH is in the shit pan. I’d probably lie in bed like nah I can’t go outside today.

sparepartalways · 06/01/2020 09:08

Even if I met the required fitness level i’d totally refuse

WineOrGinOrBoth · 06/01/2020 09:11

Hmm I don’t think people would refuse as much as they think they would. If your country, home, family, especially dds were at risk wouldn’t you fight?

Aaarrgghhh · 06/01/2020 09:18

WineOrGinOrBoth I don’t think I would. I’d rather be with my kids then away fighting and possibly dying.

TowerRingInferno · 06/01/2020 09:28

I could do all the fitness stuff but I’m too old.

MadMadMad · 06/01/2020 09:47

Oh dear, I don't think they would want me. I am disabled and can just about walk 1km in 20 minutes after which I am finished and need to sit down for a couple of hours.
I also have anxiety, am a complete coward, very emotional and like my comfort.
On the other hand if they need someone intelligent and good with computers to sit in a comfortable temperature controlled office, during normal office hours I'm their person.

BilboBercow · 06/01/2020 09:54

@helpfulperson. I can't see any good reason I'd rather kill French people than Iranian people. Conscientious objectors object to being forced to kill people.

Given the quality of life and excellent food in France, we'd probably benefit from them invading us.

LunaLovesgood · 06/01/2020 10:35

I've really enjoyed reading this whilst stuck on the maternity assessment ward. Thanks Grin

As for me, I have logistics and supply chain experience and, if I do say so, am quite good at it so would definitely go straight for that.

It was my grandads idea for WW2; volunteer slightly earlier and you can pretty much pick where you go. It's how he ended up some sort of tank boss in the desert rather than foot soldier.

Capricornandproud · 06/01/2020 10:50

I don’t think any Mumsnet thread has made me laugh as much in ages Grin

LemonPrism · 06/01/2020 11:31

I wouldn't be conscripted. I faint at blood so it'd be a death sentence so I'd likely be exempt.

LemonPrism · 06/01/2020 11:35

Failing that if they still wanted me ... I'm sorry but I'd get pregnant.

Lunafortheloveogod · 06/01/2020 12:09

I might go into labour on them... might scare off a few blokes in battle if I’ve got a head hanging out my arse end but I don’t think that’s much use.

Especially when you take in the seizures, not grand mal, but I still don’t think I’d be handy if i just freeze n go off into space momentarily n probably come round screaming since I’d likely have forgotten I was at war.

However if we want to start interrogation tactics I’ve probably watched enough sick horrors that I could be slightly more useful.

Dp would be as much use as a dish cloth in a tsunami, he’s physically fit, almost blind without glasses and fancy light adjusting lenses and will vomit n pass out if someone’s farts are too bad... all they need is a toddler with noro and he’s done for.

SciFiScream · 06/01/2020 12:12

As a Commissioned Officer in the Army Reserve (but not FFR for 14 years FFR = Fit For Role) I'd be one of the first to be called up.

I'd likely get a UK office job to release an equivalent fully fit and trained full time Army Officer.

Yes I'd cope. I'd be able to get FFR very quickly if employed to do that as I had time and pay to cover my efforts.

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