Dry January 2020. A new relationship with alcohol. Who’s joining me?

[ParanoidGynodroid]

It’s that time again!
I did my first dry January around 5 years ago, having seen it on here. It was a great thing to do: really helped my get control of my drinking. Since then I’ve done it every year, along with at least one or two other dry months.

DJ may help you:
Lose weight. ...
Get better skin. ...
Make healthier food choices. ...
Save money. ...
Sleep better. ...
Have more energy. ...
Improve your mood. ...
Improve your general health

and make you feel virtuous!

It’s not necessarily easy though, so it’s good to have support; especially if you’re feeling week and like you may give up. We can support each other here.

Join me!

@7Days that's really shit of your DH. Fuck him - sounds like you are doing brill.

First big challenge for me tonight. On a Thursday after work I normally like to sit down with a bottle of red wine, stay up really late and then end up knackered for the weekend!! Definitely a habit I would like to get out of!!

Where are you all hoping to end up with your drinking? I would love it if I could just drink on social occasions and maybe have a few on holidays. But not drink at home. I don't mind abstaining but I don't have an off switch at all!! I can't get to sleep after a drink either unless I'm totally wasted.🤔

I'd like to get to a place where I'm basically a non-drinker except for the odd classy cocktail, just one.

It's hard, I've been a drinker since I was twelve (my mother used to give me gin and bitter lemon, one of the reasons I quietly don't let my teens stay with her) and I actively love alcohol...but I have friends who don't drink and they seems so easy with it!

My parents also drink a lot @nibdedibble. They are both definitely alcoholics (my dad drinks 2 bottles of wine a day without fail). DH family drink a lot too - it seems difficult to get out of when it's all around you all the time.

My DH, although he probably gets down a fair bit of booze is much more controlled about it all. Yes he might get drunk on occasion but he can generally have a pint or have a glass one wine - I can't do that!!

I'm sorry your DH was so dismissive 7days

I'm not using the app but I reckon I must be saving around 20 euros a week - I think I'll spend that savings on something nice for myself too, what a good idea.

@ParanoidGynodroid

The Scottish Borders. I live on a farm and I got stuck a bit but managed to get out. Then 10 minutes along the road in town there's hardly anything.

Some roads locally are closed though.

It is very beautiful but does make getting around a bit of a drag. A few people didn't make it in today. Which means I lose money.

We usually get snowed in at least once a year. Which, once you get over the inconvenience of it is fab as the 5 houses all end up out in our winter wonderland together all shovelling snow and chatting about who is brave enough to tramp through the snow to get supplies. And it feels nice to be cut off. For a bit!

@7Days

It's a shame your husband hasn't understood how important this is to you and that his support would not only be helpful but kind.

He sounds like he's gotten into that negative mindset. Tell him to stop pissing on your parade. If this thread shows anything it's that positive support is a major factor in people achieving goals.

I would talk to him about this when you feel able to but until he stops being such a Negative Norman (aka a bit of a twat) then you can take all the positive support from here and buy whatever new clothes you want.

Well done everyone.

Just wanted to say thank you to @BettyJean for linking the Adrian Chiles documentary upthread. I've just finished watching it and it was really good and relatable - I'm in exactly the same boat of convincing myself that I'm not an alcoholic, but at the same time drinking way over the recommended amount and struggling with the idea of not drinking again. Highly recommended.

I also downloaded "The Unexpected Joy Of Being Sober" as it's only 99p at the moment, but that isn't resonating as much - I'm only partway through but I can't relate to her experience of drinking. Maybe the second part when she gets sober will be more inspiring!

Otherwise all good here and still not really tempted - much as I would like a glass of wine, my innate stubbornness means I'm managing to avoid it. Still having a dilemma about whether to have a drink when I go out for dinner on Saturday though - DH says he isn't going to, so that might be the deciding factor, as I'll just feel pathetic if he manages and I don't!

Posting for the first time on this thread. I had a drink on New Years Day but have been dry since and am aiming to stay that way until the 28th (My 65th birthday).

It's probably over 20 years since I have even managed a week alcohol free so am feeling quite proud. The last 3 years have been very stressful and I have averaged at least a bottle of red wine a night, with probably only one or two AF nights over the whole period.

After the 28th and the subsequent weekend I intend to go AF again for February and then restrict it to weekends and nights out (which are few).

My sleep has been crap but last night for the first time I got a reasonable sleep. Not brilliant but it never is. I have also had a headache at some time every day and today woke up with an awful phantom hangover, banging head and nausea - much worse than I have had on alcohol for years. I just keep reminding myself that I have been busing my liver for years and it's entitled to get its own back a little bit.

@7Days maybe try withdrawing the money from the bank that you have saved by not spending on booze, or at least transfer into a saver account. Then you really will see the money.

We are all doing really well, I’m thinking tomorrow night we will have a family game night - game of life, cards, or maybe some 2 or 4 player games on the Nintendo to do something different to mark the end of the working week.

Glowy skin and jawline have made an appearance today for the first time in a long time. Thanks DJ, this is good motivation.

I have questions Segregate!

Is the non-gin worth it, does it taste like gin? If it doesn't would sticking to a flavoured tonic water be a similar experience?

The Celtic south. Does it taste more like JD or whiskey (or dark rum even?)

I do like the not-gin. I have also tried Cedar and Seedlip, but I prefer this Caleno. You can get Seedlip and tonic ready made in a can, which is a good trial size.

Celtic Soul smells a bit like spiced rum, or possible a slightly smokey whiskey. Not as sweet as JD.

Thanks segregate the no- gin sounds promising. Not sure about the celtic. I like spiced rum and if but hate whiskey.

Another one saying boo to your husband 7days. I wonder if it makes him question his own drinking habits and he doesn't like it? This can be a bit of a thing apparently when faced with an abstainer.

Hello to the poster who is 65 (sorry I can't remember your name and posting on phone so can't scroll up). I'll bet you'll really feel the benefit in a couple of weeks.

Concur that the Caleno is decent. I paid almost £28 for it though which feels ridiculous

We are definitely saving money! Let's all think what lovely treats we can buy ourselves with our 'winnings'. Not sure I am saving calories as I have been eating loads of sweet stuff, even on days I never normally drink. Oh well. I usually drink 2 bottles of wine and 2 beers a week, and the app tells me that's £82 a month.

The try dry app is a huge motivator. Okay I based my usual drinking on an example of one of my worst weeks but the money and calories saved after just 10 days is incredible.

I think my Caleno was £15 in Sainsburys!

Today's bargainacious find is a silky blue wraparound dress from Paul Costelloe (for Dunnes....) £70 down to £15 in the sales. So around 2 bottles of wine. Stick that in yer pipe, 7Days'sDH!

I shall swan around the kitchen sipping my not-gin, light a scented candle, which I can't do when DH is here, and plan my weekend.

Ugh, I'm in a bad mood tonight and would have usually had at least one glass of wine by now. I'm not sure if not drinking is good for my family. I just eat my dinner and go to bed, can't be bothered watching tv. I really am in a foul mood tonight. I hope that by not drinking I'll feel proud with myself tomorrow.

What a day, so busy at work. Tonight is the first time this month I have a real craving for a drink. I even looked in 'tesco express for an alcohol free beer or wine but they didn't have anything. Hopefully this will pass, this weekend will be the real test

Looking terrific there, Segregate! 7 I suspect you made your DH feel inadequate - not an excuse but perhaps an explanation. Of course the money saved is real money!

Last night's planned drink for my birthday hasn't capsized today at all as I feared it might. In fact, it's made today feel like a Monday, so there's no chance of wanting a drink today.

I'm not craving sugar in the same way, either. Onwards and upwards!

Feeling proud and amazed that I have lasted this long. Not noticing any improvements as yet. Think I expected to wake up looking like a dewy faced slim goddess by now but no. No difference in skin, weight or sleeping. A little less anxiety and clearer headed though. I can do this! (Crosses fingers and toes). Determined to see it through to the end of the month even though the leftover wine from Christmas tries to entice me every day

I tried a non-gin thing from Asda and it’s vile. But on another thread someone said Angostura bitters in tonic is nice and I tried it. RESULT! The bitters themselves are alcoholic but apparently just 3 drops in a glass of tonic works out at something like 0.03% alcohol and I can live with that.
So day 9 done and into double figures tomorrow. Everyone is doing really well

Just checking back in. It's 2 weeks since I had a drink which is the longest for me in a very long time apart from my pregnancies, although I wasn't well at the start which made at a lot easier. Tonight is the first night that I fancied a drink, but I powered on through with a cup of coffee and by 8pm or so the craving was gone. Just really hoping I can get through the weekend, I need to prove to myself I can do this!

Well done demented. Angostura bitters really help with a lot of mixers (why are so many so sweet!). It also rescued fizzy AF wine (still AF wine is dreadful).

We still have a bottle of Seedlip from 2 years ago. I wish they'd done trial sizes back then. I don't want to spend £20+ to find it underwhelming. I need to find myself a "dry drinker" bar.

I still have some Italian AF aperitifs (Sanbitter and Crodino) that come in dinky little bottles and help me with the "i'm cooking, where's my glass" urges.

Please may I join you? I've been dipping in and out reading the thread, but also started DJ on 1st. Have found it surprisingly difficult. Fortunately my DH is doing it as well, and that makes a huge difference, I think.

We used to just drink Fri-Sun, then Thursday crept in and then Mon we'd finish up what was left from the weekend and so on and so on! My DH loves wine - we have a special fridge/cellar to keep bottles for aging and he will sit and read Decanter all evening!!

I've been finding it hard to relax and unwind though. Have had lots of hot baths and tonic to try and distract myself!! I expected my sleep and mood to improve, but if anything I feel more grumpy. However we've decided to have a curry take away tomorrow, as that doesn't go with wine, and look for an alcohol free beer. So something to look forward to at least.

Onwards and upwards!!

At this rate I’m going to gain weight, not lose it, as I’m replacing booze with fruit smoothies... still my skin is looking good 😀