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Original poster

Do you get Christmas presents from your children ?

54 replies

Lardlizard · 29/12/2019 13:10

And if so does your dh go with them to buy it ?

OP posts:
ImportantWater · 29/12/2019 14:18

I don’t know what DH does, I suspect he buys something and wraps it from the kids. I take one or two of them with me to buy something for him, ask them what they think he would like but steer them to something I know he would like (a particular book for example).

Barbararara · 29/12/2019 14:21

Yes. They make, bake or buy. I think the giving part of Christmas is very important. Dh is more likely to take them shopping than to facilitate crafts or cooking.

GameSetMatch · 29/12/2019 14:23

Two children aged 2 and 5 both go with Dad to buy me a gift usually slippers from Next , I take the children out to buy DH a gift, it’s nice I like the fact they want to buy me something.

notnowmaybelater · 29/12/2019 14:25

I never expected presents from my children, and have never told them to buy them for anyone.

They buy them though, they seem to love to. We don't go overboard at Christmas and they're delighted with each others' presents, really genuinely thrilled with the giving and receiving. I think because they do it because they choose to freely and have never, ever been told to.

It's down to them - if they ask to be taken to the shops we make that happen. Littlest is 9 and spent his whole months' pocket money on presents - I discouraged this but he wanted to. He bought everyone food items with loads of thought out into everyone's favourite treats. He only gets 12€ a month and he did lots of sums working out what to buy to be fair. His siblings were really sweetly chuffed with what he chose them, as was I with my little mini bag of Lindt truffles :)

The older two are 13 and 15 and more independent and also able to order online with preloaded debit cards. They can be really creative and innovative and thoughtful, for one another as well as DH and I.

It's really lovely, but I'd hate it if it were forced or fake, it means so much because they do it freely because they want to. DH and I never bought things pretending they were from the children when they were little, only facilitated their own independent requests for help when they decided they wanted to buy presents too.

christmasathome · 29/12/2019 14:29

Some years we make an effort to take them shopping and let them choose presents for us but other years like this year we just put their names on presents we have bought / well I did, my DH just left all my presents blank so any with no label were mine 😢

I can't complain too much though as I got an awful lot of presents- must have had at least 20 to open.

allthesharks · 29/12/2019 15:03

My DDs are 3 and 5 so can't shop independently but my Mum has bought presents on their behalf, with their input since their Dad and I separated. This year, my DP took them out shopping for Christmas presents for me and my Mum got them to choose some things online for me. My DDs love choosing the gifts and they're so excited to give them to me on the day. I think it's important that they know it's not all about receiving gifts, so I do they same for grandparents.

We3kingsoforientareandabump · 29/12/2019 15:08

Yes my Dh takes eldest 3 (9,8,5) to choose me something and chooses something from youngest (1)

Wotrewelookinat · 29/12/2019 15:14

My daughters are 14 and 15. They got together and made us some beautiful homemade chocolates. The best thing for me was that they did it together and enjoyed themselves when normally all they do is bicker!

ManiacalLapwing · 29/12/2019 15:17

No, but my teen only gets chocolate and money from me anyway. If DC got me a bar of dark chocolate for Christmas or a birthday I'd be happy, but I'm not fussed about getting anything. I'm a single parent so there was no one to take DC when they were younger.

BrieAndChilli · 29/12/2019 15:23

We’ve always got the 3 children to buy each other and us presents. I think it’s really important that they realise that time, thought and effort goes into the presents that they receive and that Christmas isn’t just about getting but also giving too.

When they were really little we took them to the pound shop and let them buy something from everyone. Did result in some random things! Then we gave them a budget of £5 per person and took them to somewhere like home bargains.
Now they are aged 9-13 they get £10 per person, and we take them shopping to the big shopping centre and they also look online etc. Sometimes they add their pocket money to their budget if they want to get something a bit more expensive and sometimes pool together on a gift.
I think it teaches them a lot of useful skills and how not to be selfish and entitled.

DelurkingAJ · 29/12/2019 15:25

Yes. They are 3 and 7 and don’t yet have pocket money so we buy on their behalf but they “choose”. DS1 actually sits with me and decides, DS2 makes a suggestion which I then interpret. DH does the same with them for me.

My DP did this and I wasn’t expected to pay until I had an allowance. I most certainly have always bought for my DPs (and my other family) so it seems to have worked.

ayvasili · 29/12/2019 16:10

My children have bought presents since they were very little. At first it was the pound shop equivalent,now they get a budget and shop at flying tiger or some such shop, they have to think about who they buy for,and how much they have to do it. They both love Christmas shopping, and have done forever :) it's one of our favourite parts of Christmas

reginafelangee · 29/12/2019 16:14

No mine are still too young

Glittertwins · 29/12/2019 16:40

DD11 decided to buy us some presents when she was out with a friend. She kindly let DS join in as joint ones.

SunshineDays2019 · 29/12/2019 16:47

Yes, our teen DD bought lovely thoughtful gifts for me and DH. She has a part time job now and really enjoyed buying with her own money this year. In previous years we helped her choose for each other when she was young, moving on to giving her money to shop independently as she got older. I agree with PPs that it is important for children to learn to give at a young age, and our DD has always enjoyed giving gifts and seeing others delight.

skankingpiglet · 29/12/2019 18:01

My DCs are 5 and 3yo. They each 'buy' a gift for me and DH, plus one for each other. Mine and DH's gift are organised through the school's PA so we pay in advance (£2/gift), the PA set out a stall, the DCs choose what they'd like to given and it comes home with them already wrapped. I then take each DC separately to the shops to buy a gift for the other, with a maximum £5 spend.

Although at the moment it is our money they're spending, they are learning other skills from it. The 5yo this year finally understood that a gift should be what the receiver would like, not just what you want yourself. She also grasped a bit more of budgeting with her sister's present, and looked hard and thoughtfully to find the right gift at the right price (her sister was delighted with it, and she was very pleased with she got too). They both loved handing over their gifts on Christmas day and watching them being opened. It's never too early to learn to give IMO.

ManiacalLapwing · 29/12/2019 18:02

I think it’s really important that they realise that time, thought and effort goes into the presents that they receive and that Christmas isn’t just about getting but also giving too.
My teen DC isn't fussed about getting anything though, Christmas is more about quality time with family for us, not giving or receiving as much. We do token gifts with family such as consumables as we have most things we need already. I don't think that makes us selfish, it's about different priorities.

NemophilistRebel · 29/12/2019 18:02

Yes, child is nearly 3 and DH takes him shopping for me and I take him shopping for DH.

NorthernSpirit · 29/12/2019 18:08

I have 2 DSC - 11 & 14 and I’m embarrassed to say they turned up for Christmas without even a homemade card, let alone a cheap present for their dad. It’s the same on his birthday or Father’s Day.

Children should learn the art of giving as well as receiving.

Gibbonsgibbonsgibbons · 29/12/2019 18:12

They make us gifts Smile

I have a beautiful pin cushion, a cute pompom creature & a lovely drawing. The wee one got in a fankle & couldn’t find any of her presents —because if a picture is special she of course crunches it up into a tiny ball—

TheTurnOfTheScrew · 29/12/2019 18:20

Yes. H helps 9yo , but she knew what she wanted to get - Hotel Chocolat this year. 12yo gets something herself with her pocket money - got two nice pairs of slipper socks. I think it's really touching, especially the 12yo chosing to spend her own money.

JPduck · 29/12/2019 18:21

Last year and this year my dd went with a family member to buy a gift for me and dh, she took her own money, budget of £5 pp💕

JPduck · 29/12/2019 18:21

NB DD age 7

hazeyjane · 29/12/2019 18:25

Yes. Dd's (12 and 13) spent pocket money and went out on their own to get something for dh and I, they wanted something very specific for their brother and asked if I could order it. Ds is 9 and has additional needs, he said what he wanted to get for everyone and used the money in his money box (topped up by me!) to get stuff.

gamerwidow · 29/12/2019 18:26

DH took DD(9) our to buy a gift but needed telling ‘I am expecting a gift take her out and get one please’. Its not so much for me but I think it’s good for children to spend a little bit of time thinking about what to give to someone else.