Christmas really isn't the same now the kids are older.....

[Dickorydockwhatthe]

They are nearly 12 and 15 neither believe in santa or into toys this year. To be honest they haven't even asked for alot so it has been very hard choosing presents. Although it's been a nice day the magic and excitement isn't there. We played games last night and watched a movie ut they have been in their rooms for most of the afternoon and dh has een falling asleep 😁

DS13 told me he preferred this year to last as he felt there was less build up and he had a good day, with less disappointment because he had less expectations. I was so happy. We didn't go and join other family so it was just us four and I lost my father a month ago so I wasn't really in the mood to do a lot of xmasy stuff.

I love christmas now they are older (18-22). I do a stocking for everyone with small funny things (favourite this year was a mug for dd2 that said "You should see my active bitch face". They do small gifts for everyone. We open the stockings while having sausages and pancakes. Then we go to mass (only day of the year they come with us). They are in their rooms now and dh and I are having coffee while xmas music plays but later they will take the dog for a walk with us.We do a nice fancy dinner and then we play cards against humanity.

My DC are 23,21 and 19.

We have had the loveliest family day-a very different life stage-so nice to have them buying thoughtful presents for us and each other. Very chilled morning, then a drink at our local. fab dinner with everyone helping, then our usual geeky hours of trivia. Walked the dog, now waiting for Gavin and Stacy.
I miss the young children days like crazy but this has been one of the nicest family christmas days ever...

I'm looking forward to being able to enjoy more grown up games and TV shows with them, to them helping to cook properly, hopefully to being a bit more adventurous in where we go, when they are older they will be able to sing hymns properly etc. Going to midnight mass with them will be fabulous! We skipped Christmas morning service the last couple of years too so it will be good to get back to that.
I'm not looking forward to worrying about them coming home from Christmas Eve drinks though, I remember doing that as a teenager and now think how my parents must have worried, with some irresponsible friends and drunk drivers out and about.

My teen kids made me my Xmas breakfast and it was brilliant. They ran me a bubble bath, lit a candle then while I was in it made coffee, glass of apple juice, cinnamon rolls and bacon bap. I made the main Xmas lunch but they'd help prep yesterday so it wasn't stressful really. (I set timers on my phone to get stuff out etc)
They are an age where they can buy gifts for me online/in shops and they will humour me with talk like "I hope FC comes tonight" etc

I didn't have to wrestle cable ties off anything this year. It was fun when they were little. But dinner was 40 minutes late and it didn't matter as they are too old to cry about being hungry. I do miss the excitement about father Christmas and watching norad etc. But they are still the same people. It's different but still good. My dcs are the same age as yours.

I think it depends how you approach it.

In our house every present is still a surprise. They get up early and open their gifts with as much excitement as always. The only difference here is that they know it's me and not Santa. I don't buy to order or give money and I spend ages trying to get things they like. I haven't failed them yet and the oldest is 18. She was as excited this morning as she was when she was 8.

DC are 12 and 14. It's been lovely! Me and dd have built lego this afternoon and it's been magic in that family magic way, not father christmas magic. I love it

Ds is now in his bedroom playing fifa, dd is still fiddling with lego. Me and dp are drinking brandies and waiting for gavin and stacey. Feels pretty perfect to me.

What do we do together...

The 12yo criticises my cooking, helps get the fire running, talks about random rubbish in his head, natters about his fave pressies.

15yo wants me watch while he shoots things with nerf gun (has very good aim).
They both helped finish a jigsaw today.

Wanted a long walk but the older one has bad cold, hopefully tomorrow.

Mine are 24, 22 and 18. It is different but still very enjoyable. We do tiny stockings for each other and do give gifts (if we didn’t, when would we get presents?) We have a very traditional Christmas dinner and everyone prepares different parts of it. We play lots of games and might even put the tv on in the evening. We do usually have relatives round or go to relatives. Currently the only young one is my 8 year old niece.

We are in the wistful years, DS (age 7) told me last night 'I'm looking at santa right now, aren't I Mummy?' . Still had a fun day.

I've had the best Christmas ever!
My two are 16 & 19 and didn't wake up until after 10 am.
Due to family dynamics I did the big family roast thing on Sunday and was looking forward to a quiet day today with lots of tv and toast.
Kids offered to cook to give me a break and so we've had a fabulous meal of steak and chips - and cocktails 🍹😁
It's been very relaxing....

15 and 18 - both went back to bed after opening presents. No worries about hiding stuff and staying awake until they're both asleep. Gifts are definitely smaller and more expensive these days though !!

I can't wait until I don't have to keep up the pretence anymore and the kids KNOW I'm doing it all. So much constant pressure and stress and it's all on me as their dad left. I spent all morning in tears and didn't even make them a lunch. I needed a hug and no one was there because no one ever is.

for @straycatstrut
I feel a bit like that but I have DH as well.

This is my first year with no believers, they’re aged from 11-19. We’ve had a fab day, all the old traditions, walk, late dinner then we’re now doing a bonkers family quiz where everyone writes a round... I much prefer it - they really appreciate the time together, they eat the food and do the washing up 😁

My two are 18 and 15 and still woke me up to show me their stocking presents 😬
But it was 8.15am not silly o'clock like it used to be when they were little!
Yes it's different but we still do the same traditions that are now the law. Curry with friends on Xmas eve, to the pub on Xmas day lunchtime, lazy snacky tea.
It's lovely to sit and chat as adults over Xmas lunch and to really relax with them both.
It's been wonderful.
DD18 is filling her basket in the online Zara sale with her Xmas money 🙄 and DS15 is on his PS4. DH and I are snacking and snoozing on the sofa. Bliss.

I was just thinking earlier that Christmas is so much better when the kids are older,.
This year I have actually managed to spend a good bit of the day on the sofa. Unheard of previously.
I watched the rest of Home Alone with DC 3. And I had a doze.
Then read my 1940s Christmas whodunnit by the fire with a glass of something nice. Feel so relaxed!
DC are 15, 13 and 7. Have all played nicely and been kind to each other (older two usually bicker all day every day!).
We have just finished playing cluedo.
We have had a right laugh doing Charades (older ones had never played it!!) and we bought musical crackers with little numbered bells and have been playing carols etc —badly— on them.
No hours putting toys together. No playing with Paw Patrol, or watching Peppa Pig. No tears or tantrums.
It’s been bloody fab!
‘The magic’ for us is family time, not Santa.

17 and 20 here .

I do miss the toddler/infant school years but I was much younger then, I don't think I could do it now
I used to organise Christmas so it was 'seamless' . Presents were bought and wrapped and hidden.

Food shopping done while DH took them to the cinema .
Trips out planned - London to see the lights, cinema, feeding the reindeer , Father Christmas Trains .....

DS prefers money . I buy him some clothes ( underwear, PJs , hoody type) some showegels , a book, guitar bits .

DD does A List

So their presents are easier to buy , not like guessing which toy they;d like and hopefully not change their minds about .

Christmas Dinner is more relaxed too.

Mine are 16 and 17 - this has been a good Christmas. I found the Santa years hard because of the pressure of making Christmas 'magic'. The early teens also hard because they are growing up, being a bit difficult and it is hard to get it right (whatever that means). This year a corner has been turned - suddenly appreciative, happy to eat, chat and enjoying their gifts - everyone relaxed. Fabulous.

Ds(15) unwrapped presents, played with them for a bit and got him to show me what it could do (new mobile), helped make cooked breakfast, walked dog together, helped with dinner (chatted while he peeled /chopped carrots, warmed gravy, helped lay Table, poured drinks), watched die hard and who wants to be a millionaire together, played a new fun board game (made dh join in).

He was on ps4 with friends for an hour or so this afternoon and after WWTBAM (while I caught up with soaps!), but otherwise a good day.

My DC now very much older have always loved Christmas and continue to love it. Partly I think because we either went to other people for Christmas or hosted ourselves, partly because we didn't overstress and often had presents as late as Boxing Day to eke out the early overgifting. Now the DC enjoy their own homes - and have other families to visit - but they love things like the trees, charades etc etc. The utter enchantment of young children is gone but instead there are adults who love the celebration of family and friends.

Mine are early to mid-20s now. I prefer our Christmases now, much less pressure. The only bad thing has been that the eldest had to work today, but we adjusted our timetable to fit. It's been a very nice, relaxed day.

I never tried too hard to make Christmas 'magic'. It was always as laid back as possible for the sake of my sanity - we often spent the whole day in pajamas..

Now that mine are aged 18-29 nobody believes in Santa any more, obv, but I still do presents and wait til they're asleep before setting them out under the tree. I get something they want and a surprise or two each. They exchange gifts with one another and each one gives me a gift too on Christmas Eve. It's lovely to see how thoughtful they are about gifts. Two stayed in pajamas all day.