Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Any catholics on here who can answer a question for me?

136 replies

TrySleepingWithABrokenHeart · 15/12/2019 10:39

I go to church every Sunday and although I take communion, I don’t have the wine.

Is this disrespectful of me? Or is this optional?

I feel like I have a strange fear of it for some reason. I also struggle to share cups etc with other people so the combination of these two things is the reason why.

I definitely don’t want to be disrespectful so I’d be really grateful for your opinions on this. Thanks.

OP posts:
LazyDaisey · 15/12/2019 10:40

Hardly anyone takes the wine at ours.

fluffedup · 15/12/2019 10:42

It's definitely optional.

AlphaJura · 15/12/2019 10:43

I went to Catholic Church and school as a child. My mum is still a practising catholic. I was always annoyed that they never offered the wine! I'd only ever had it on rare occasions in different locations. Maybe it's just our church.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Philosophy & religion
Prokupatuscrakedatus · 15/12/2019 10:43

I my experience of more than 50 years only those that are helping to hand out communion take wine (or the non alcoholic equivalent) "ordinary" members of the congregation don't.

LaBarbera · 15/12/2019 10:43

I live in a Catholic country and usually only the bread is given. Please don't worry. The best piece of theological advice I was ever given is "show up and do what you can".

LynetteScavo · 15/12/2019 10:47

I ever take the wine. I'm not even sure why. It's just habit.

Original poster
TrySleepingWithABrokenHeart · 15/12/2019 10:47

Ahhh that’s a relief. The church I used to go to only seemed to offer the wine to the congregation on rare occasions, however, the church I go to now offers it every week and as far as I have seen, I am the only person who doesn’t take it so I was unsure if that was wrong of me.

OP posts:
PanicAndRun · 15/12/2019 10:48

The wine is there but very few take it. They know this as the cups have very little in.

ADogInTheManger · 15/12/2019 10:51

Are you a baptised Catholic?

ParkheadParadise · 15/12/2019 10:58

Only those handing out communion take the wine in my church.

PTW1234 · 15/12/2019 11:06

I grew up catholic and went to mass often. Not many people took the wine and was mostly people who where “involved” in the church.

People may take a dim view of you taking communion if you haven’t been baptised..

Original poster
TrySleepingWithABrokenHeart · 15/12/2019 11:06

@ADogInTheManger

Yes, I was baptised as a baby.

OP posts:
Original poster
TrySleepingWithABrokenHeart · 15/12/2019 11:08

People may take a dim view of you taking communion if you haven’t been baptised..

Why would you think I wasn’t baptised? Obviously you can’t take communion until you have received the sacrament of First Holy Communion.

OP posts:
ForalltheSaints · 15/12/2019 11:11

I don't think it is disrespectful. There have been occasions especially when at Mass abroad where it has not been offered.

ADogInTheManger · 15/12/2019 11:14

To be fair a friend started attending Catholic Church and she was unaware of that fact and took Communion. She's not the only one whom I've known to do so.

The only occasion when I've known everyone to be offered wine was when the church was celebrating a very special anniversary. Otherwise most people don't take it and often don't seem to be offered it so I think that you're fine.

GertrudeCB · 15/12/2019 11:18

Its optional.

thegreylady · 15/12/2019 11:20

My dh is a devout Catholic and I sometimes go to Mass with him. He says that the wine is optional. The priest distributes the Host and there are deacons holding a chalice on either side and you can choose whether or not to take the wine.

Honeybee85 · 15/12/2019 11:23

Is that still served at Churches? I don’t think it’s disrespectful at all.

The wafer symbolizes the body of Christ, the wine his blood. Most churches serve only the wafer.

I think it’s very outdated to let everyone in Church drink from the same cup and just wipe the cup rim with a cloth in between. It’s very unhygienic and for that reason alone already I wouldn’t take it.

Serenschintte · 15/12/2019 11:24

If you are receiving HC at Mass you receive the fullness of Jesus in the Host. There is not need to also have the wine. It doesn’t add anything more iyswim.
In fact before Vatican 2 when the mass was changed from Latin to the local language no one would receive the wine, only the host. Both our fully Jesus

ShamblyChristmas · 15/12/2019 11:28

Why not ask your priest? Explain about not wishing to be disrespectful. He should be helpful (sadly not all of them are in reality I've found) but try asking first.

I live abroad where wine is offered on high days and holidays. Here it's customary to receive communion by taking the host and then dipping it in to the chalice of wine (held by another priest alongside). I think that is a more practical way of doing it, but it does require more manpower. (Could a lay helper hold the consecrated wine, not sure?)

Rockbird · 15/12/2019 11:29

I don't think I've taken the wine since my first communion many moons ago. I never even think about it.

maddiemookins16mum · 15/12/2019 11:42

You only take communion after your first holy communion (which you must be baptised to take). One of my pals (48 years ago) was baptised the Sunday before our FHC.

cheezy · 15/12/2019 11:44

Wow I never knew it was optional! I’ve never noticed anyone not taking wine as well. I would have thought it was a fairly significant part of the whole thing (body and blood)

MsMellivora · 15/12/2019 11:57

I’m not a catholic but at my church I have never noticed anyone not have both. My mate is a Methodist and I know they have tiny individual tumblers which is appealing on a hygiene level. I remember during the swine flu epidemic we had no wine.

Rosere · 15/12/2019 11:59

Totally optional. Not all churches even offer it. I was an adult and in a different city before I even witnessed it.

Swipe left for the next trending thread